Has mowed the lawn in the nude.
Doesn't eat cold pizza.
Likes his Coke cherry flavored.
Will never wear skinny jeans.
Takes care of his feet.
Uses the word literally correctly.
Knows Hitler was a vegetarian.
Will not offer you webcam action.
If I drop food on the floor, I eat it.
Will actually show up for a date.
Buys the good toilet paper.
And changes the roll
Drove all over the country just to eat at strange places
Is making an effort to be nicer
can't respect anyone that likes Kid Rock
Will not write LOL without actually doing it
Will actually read your profile.
Has actually slipped on a banana peel.
Won't stand you up
Draws the line at country music
Does the yoga but not like a pro
Likes peas but carrots can go fuck themselves
Makes his own chocolate
Always leaves the seat down so the cat can use it too
You can't see my eyes when I giggle
Knows what irony means
Follows Archer's butler on Twitter