Eccentric retired rock star, romantic, freelance elephant exterminator. (Smirk if you like, but when was the last time you were pestered by elephants?) I used to be a homeopathic fireman. To be honest, sometimes the mister wasn't enough and I had to resort to crystals to put the fire out.
You are the dashing, imperious type and hold most people and all pet fish in contempt. You are quick tempered, impatient and scornful of advice. You are a dynamic figure, able to tread water splendidly, so long as it's not too deep. You have a deep and abiding faith in model trains, but are constantly dismayed at their inability to carry anything larger than a small piece of peanut brittle. Your name strikes fear into the hearts of the peasants of Bolivia. You patently refuse to believe in the existence of your own kneecaps, a position which you will tragically come to rue. In elementary school the other children mocked you, chanting, "Postmodernism is an affliction of the fin-de-siecle decadent!" You can play bluegrass pipe organ. You are an abstract thinker, which means that you will always be shunned and misunderstood, and rightly so. You think that letters pre-approving you for credit are "fan mail".