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49 Portland, OR Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 35–50
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Today – 6:56pm
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
A little extra
Mostly anything
Trying to quit
Other, and laughing about it
Cancer, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of university
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t want kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
caveat: i am looking for someone who is kinky and guided by a keen interest in BD/SM. if that makes you blanch or you do not know what that is you are wasting your time reading this profile. i consider myself a sexual deviant and i am looking for like minded perverts who feel empowered identifying as such. queers, freaks, outlaws, transgender peeps, faggots, cross dressers, leather fetishist, dominatrixes, and all around hedonist come on in!

the joys of self-summary are as boundless as they are ridiculous. i am not too serious. i like to tease and be teased. i really don't think dating is what i would call fun. i like to camp in the summer and take hikes in the gorge. i am a member of a supper club that constantly needs guidance. i use a sonicare. floss sometimes. my poker game is slow and steady. you either play to win or lose. sounds simple but there is a zen to it. i am clean. i am employed. i try not to close the perimeters on my likes because i think people are pretty groovy and this kind of profile business is mostly a drag. i like to think i am a good communicator. i'm house trained and friendly. i really like spell check and as you can see am not very fond of upper case letters. i only give a bit of a fuck for strunk and white, but i subscribe to the new yorker cuz i like people who write sentences that adhere to the rules. grammar and spelling mistakes happen. edit me. i welcome it. feelings are more important than a command of text. but if that is on your resume it is way hawt! i like to combine words and make up my own as caprice sees fit. ya feel me, girly big brains?
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
not enough dancing. you wouldn't know it upon meeting me but when it comes to getting down i can bring it. i spent the early nineties raving like a fiend in san francisco.
my job is cool and gives me a sense of doing something meaningful, valueable, with potential for learning new approaches to urban pressures.
somewhere along the line from becoming a little punk, to a mushroom eating raver, to a union organizing bike-messenger i became a productive member of society. just don't call me a cog.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
shaving my head. cooking. making sure i have a present if i am going to a birthday party. changing flat tires on bikes. playing air drums. being honest even if it means it will get me in trouble.
scrabble. i would go on a date with you simply because you love scrabble.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
that i am really good at shaving my head. that i am pretty confident about myself and that i have a laser like focus with regards to what i'm doing with my life. not. that i can stare hard. imagine my photos with my fist clinched and my arms all muscle. intense, right? henry rollins would cower.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
authors: thomas pynchon, jd salinger, james ellroy, lester bangs, william burroughs, martin amos, david sedaris, don dellilo, celine, p.k. dick.
movies: the big lebowski, apocalypse now, the big sleep, l.a. confidential, welcome to the doll house, 2001 a space odyssey, the usual suspects.
shows: the butthole surfers, sonic youth, black flag, emmylou harris, the dirtbombs, david byrne, luna, echo and the bunnymen, aimee mann, the minutemen, funkadelic, x...showing my age here.
food.: i will try almost anything although not that crazy shit, like, hyena ass, that anthony bourdain eats. or the balls of mammals. well, define "eat."
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
friends, laughs, cheese, a good campfire, garlic, and music.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
i am a male. engines, obviously!
tuneage, dude! i spend a lot of time listening to music. and my taste are eclectic. mostly indie. and i am aware for the semantic hang uppers of the contradictions inherent in those last two sentences. i wouldn't call myself a hipster but some would. i was recently told my profile made them think of portlandia. i felt equally unsatisfied and accomplished.
related to the music loves, which is just a chore to list, i will try this thing which maybe will work or seem pretentious or lazy or harebrained or kinda smart. which kinda captures what kind of dude i am anyway.
go here:
food is pretty high on this list. i am always up for trying something new and my palate gravitates towards savory and spicy. i read restaurant reviews and am up for trying something sumptuous and new times infinity.
sex in its endless permutations. although i quit reading savage love with any meals. some pleasures and curiosities are not meant to be mixed.
why i think about the the things i think about.
why people with otherwise good taste can indulge the band sublime.
why i pretended to not like led zeppelin when punk-rock happened.
how a band such as the xx can create such lush, sophisticated compositions of minimalism that are vaguely erotic and richly atmosheric and yet, uniformly, have abysmal taste in footwear.
what the political landscape of the u.s.a. would look like if the disenfranchised voted.
why some women feel it is acceptable to wear sweatpants with the word "pink" on the ass. for about two seconds i may forget you have a vagina and keep my end of the conversation flowing. not now. thanks for the reminder. how about i wear cargo pants that have the word "shaft" on the zipper cover?
why radio in this town is more or less terrible. especially "alternative music" on KNRK.
why we water lawns. how much water is wasted with bad irrigation systems that i could fix.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
having beers with my friends at the basement pub. my friends are boss and love as quickly as they ridicule the silly or dumb statement. which i certainly make my share of. and that, dear reader, only partly sums up me and what i give and take. love and ridicule. this spectrum is one of many offered by the springloaded experience. dynamics abound. paradigm shifts are pretty much guaranteed. irreverence is required. sweetness is in no short supply. hopefully, good belly laughs will top it all off.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
i had a mullet circa '82. i have no hair---on the dome---and will never make this ill-conceived choice again.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you want to chat. you want to make fun of me. you want me to make fun of you. you like awkward mutual attraction being revealed. you play air guitar. we could be the next black keys, white stripes, power duo. you think we could take down all fools and playas with our wicked air band. you like to go to genies for breakfast.

you are some kind of crazy. have a borderline personality disorder. secretly harbor an end of the world fantasy. are "kinky." like everything about leather. you want to wear a strap-on and play with gender roles. if you identify your sexuality as perverse. we probably wont be a good match if you are vanilla. can watch a baseball game and not find it boring. need directions.