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29 Chicago, IL Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–40
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 5:19am
Straight, Sapiosexual, Heteroflexible
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Graduated from university
Open relationship
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Has cats
English (Fluently), French (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Seeking: Gordon Lish.

I don't drink--and believe me, no one is more bummed about this than me--but I'm not living sober. Just looking for friends and networks and contemporaries and compatriots, and whatever else that might mean to you.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
- Reading short stories, and avoiding long stories. Trying to make my long stories much shorter.
- Writing, editing, revising, and submitting. And then, three to six months later, dissolving into inconsolable melancholy.
- Organizing things into lists.
- Werk. (I work at an animal hospital. No, I'm not a doctor. I would have led with that.)
- Internet.
- Video Games.
- Sometimes, when the mood is weird, I like to draw cartoons.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Terse exposition.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Beard / No Beard
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
The Things They Carried, Fight Club, Game of Thrones, Harvey Danger, egg whites, The Best of American Short Stories (any #0000), Iron Man 3, Supernatural (Apologist), Ben Folds, broccoli; Lolita, No Country For Old Men, The Walking Dead, Green Day (Apologist), Swedish Fish, Hearthstone, The Road, Cowboy Bebop, Coffee, The New Yorker, 30 Rock, Achewood, Cabinet: An Arts and Culture Quarterly.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
...Rock N Roll SCOTUS. Net Neutrality! Affordable Care Act! GAY MARRIAGE! diamonds are essentially rocks with no flavor. foundation looks gross up close. It clogs your pores, and then you have to buy a separate product to clean it off and clear your skin. That's called vertical integration. You're a slave. little I know about basic macro-scale physics.
...Chicagoan's idea of pizza. Stop over-thinking it, guys.
...Iron Man suits.
...what the perfect sentence is. (It isn't this one, or the last.)
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Invoking Primea Noctis.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
"I'm not creepin'," he said, lyingly.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You like meh face / we have similar interests / you are cool. Also, if you'd like to go on long weekend bike rides, that is something I never get to do, and would really like to. And also, if coffee. Coffee coffee coffee.

(I know you probably get a lot of messages, so I'm likely not going to message you first. But you should message me, especially if we "liked" each other.)