Find better matches with our advanced matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


36 M Sunnyvale, CA

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sagittarius, but it doesn’t matter
Space camp
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Has cats
English (Fluently), German (Poorly), French (Poorly), C++ (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
My profile will be a challenge to you, unless you have telepathy - in which case you already know why you should get in touch with me. Until then, please know that it's difficult to write "funny" and "thoughtful" at the same time. Put another way: online, "the failure mode of 'clever' is 'asshole'."

Submitted for your consideration, one nonmonogamous kinky geeky introvert. I like digging into technology and admire people who excel at something. I'm more balanced than I let on - you could call me stoic and measured - but this is a good forum to be all awkward. While I'm very keen on physical intimacy and the thrill of NRE, I'm open to meeting all kinds of folks - there's no ulterior motive behind my quest for project hacking buddies.

"He's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same."
What I’m doing with my life
Decades after it happened, JFK's Gemini speech inspires me: "We choose to ... do the other things. Not because they are easy, but because they are hard."

Magical engineering behind the curtain to keep the internet as you know it from falling apart. At least, that's my day job. The size of my research projects list? Top gun fans might think "long but distinguished... So's my Johnson! "

I'm often inventing something that solves an immediate problem of mine, then giving it away -- open source, if you're into that sort of thing -- because I abhor the thought of humanity wasting more precious time on previously solved problems.

Procrastinating over a flying lessons while running a space program out of my kitchen. Space camp is no joke.
I’m really good at
I'm good at shibari, writing code and while I won't be appearing on the food network anytime soon, people like it when I cook. I'm amazing at tetris and tetris-like activities (dishwasher loading, packing moving vans, international travel with carry-on luggage...)

After a bad day I'm more likely to tell you how to terminate the offenders and where to hide the bodies than to offer comforting platitudes... though my snuggles are world-class.

Recent snippets of feedback: "you're so good at making me feel sexy", "you're the best husband ever", "you win so many boyfriend points", "you would make an excellent cult leader!"
The first things people usually notice about me
My well-written, yet intimidating prose.

I'm measured and purposeful - restrained, even. Occasionally people hit on me for being tall. At parties people tell me I have excellent posture.

I'm a terrible, horrible human being. Not really, but I do make some pretty awful puns. Ask me for a rant about the meaning of friendship, human connection, enlightenment, and titles.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
From time to time I'll sacrifice an evening on a pulpy thriller but preference goes the likes of Richard K. Morgan or Neal Stephenson. When not devouring something silly, I'll often be poring over some technical reference. XKCD, Sinfest, and A Softer World rate high in my morning comics list.

I'm fond of heist or caper films and spy movies, political or technological thrillers. Sneakers, Enemy of the State, War Games, Hackers, Thomas Crown Affair - you get the idea. Plenty of ground for debate on solving social problems with technical means. The last thing I watched on youtube was a teardown of a rubidium frequency standard.

I am something of a caffeine snob; it appeals to my fondness for ritual and craft, especially the daily ceremony of grinding coffee and running the aeropress. My cheesecake can take on Bettie Page and Betty Crocker, any day.

Among other things, my car CD is a mix of Gotan Project, VNV Nation, Delerium, Icon of Coil, trance, Deadmau5 and Bach cello concertos. Now seeking recommendations for a good baroque, chamber, or salon orchestra; SFCO was a royal disappointment.
The six things I could never do without
* My chosen family: My wife boundfaith , my sweety pianississimo; and my cat basementcat (rescued from a snowstorm a decade ago).
* the Internet. It's like someone put a coffee shop in the Library of Alexandria. And it pays the bills.
* Novelty and adventure, because boredom and monotony will eat you alive.
* Nonmonogamy. I was never really comfortable with the notion of exclusivity, and I've found that poly helps me to better appreciate everyone in my life.
* Privacy and secrets. I'll gladly bend your ear about it sometime, but not unless you ask.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Psychology and language. If you have some sort of psych background I have some questions for you. Linguistics, machine learning, and translation would also be good topics for discussion.

Privacy, security, liberty as both abstract concepts and operational contexts. Code is my activism - less complaining, more fixing.

I hack appliances and recipes, the end result of which is (genetically modified, polysaturated, high-glycemic, non-vegan, highly un-kosher) awesomesauce.

Kittens and otters. Yes, I saw the article asserting that all the cute animals are actually pretty mean.
On a typical Friday night I am
Building a telescope. You'll likely find me at Chabot grinding a big-ish mirror by hand, because I'm stubborn and tactile.

Previous weekends have included: tying someone up, playing with the cat, driving in the mountains, or building stuff.

What do you think we should be doing together?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
There is a lump of uranium on my desk, which I use to find (and fix) design flaws in radiation detectors. That probably makes me an atomic playboy.

I was stung by a scorpion when I was 12, permanently paralyzing the muscles that would have allowed me to smile. Sorry 'bout that.

Dusty burning man photos are way better than Dia de Muertos paint. I try to not be judgmental, but you must know that it's really #notyourbestface.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 25–43
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
You should message me if
... mocking movies is your preferred way to appreciate them.
...if you want to go driving on twisty roads with loud music and the sunroof open.
... If ethical non-monogamy works for you. I am reclaiming the term Polyfuckery (it sounds like fun).
... if you're looking for a project hacking buddy. Example topics: aerospace, machine learning, psychometrics, security, embedded systems. Or if you can teach me about things - a crash course in FPGA design would be fantastic.
... if you'd prefer to grab a coffee sometime rather than wasting time with online chat. I'm always up for a shot of espresso, not looking for a pen pal.

And you should really, really contact me if you like being tied up.