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26 M Ovenden, United Kingdom

My Details

Last Online
Today – 12:05pm
5′ 11″ (1.81m)
Body Type
A little extra
Relationship Status
Relationship Type

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My self-summary
I'm an eternal pessimist or at least I hope I am. See what I did there? It's hard to sum up myself without either sounding like an arrogant, self important knob or somebody who feels far too sorry for themselves. I guess I'm kinda good, kinda funny and kinda intelligent. Now tell me you're not kinda interested!
What I’m doing with my life
Wasting it working in a warehouse whilst laboriously struggling through my debut novel. I'm pretty much JK Rowling, George RR Martin and all the contributing authors of the bible rolled into one. That is my prowess as a storyteller if I had to sum it up.
I’m really good at
Looking fine and kidding myself.
The first things people usually notice about me
Erm tits. Or my half beard. Or my ghetto booty. Or my majestic, noble steed named Dave who adores polos and xenophobia.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Pretty much digging Game of Thrones in all of its formats at the moment.

Alpha Papa made me laugh...a lot.

Neil Diamond. Need I say more on him?

Is there a better tasting food when done right than a roast potato? I don't think so.
The six things I could never do without
1. Hope
2. Laughter
3. People
4. Working joints - otherwise everybody would just be rigid statues and nothing would get done.
5. Teeth - what can I say, I have a nice smile.
6. A head - because then I'd just be 'that guy without the head' and that'd be embarrassing!

So there you go three serious ones, three not so serious...I don't really care about hope or laughter.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Writing the wittiest answers to the categories on an OK Cupid profile.
On a typical Friday night I am
Well I guess I'm marking it off on my calendar as being one week closer to the end. Is that too dark? I sense it's too dark.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
That if Neil Diamond was to ask for my hand in marriage I'd drop you immediately!
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 19–30
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating
You should message me if
You dig ugly, wannabe authors. If that's your bag then look no further. Here I am!