"raised by wolves from the age of 5 after the untimely death of both step parents will first came to the attention of the swedish government in 1988 as a ferral and semi-literate hound master. after 3 years of intensive mind programming he joined the swedish special forces and built a reputation for eating chocolate whilst all around him crumbled. this led to his first court marshalling after choosing to eat a kinder beuno rather than save the life of the notibly corrupt then swedish leader oyvind leonhardsen.
his career in the forces never recovered and very little is known of his life between 1993 to 1998. speculation points to a series of unexplained shootings in the russian mafia but all evidence is scarce. what cannot be refuted is that, having spent his life up to this point as a 3 foot tall troll with huge arms and a tendancy toward violent lunacy, will emerged from this unknown period well over 6 foot with a calm and laid back persona. it is thought that will only kills occasionally now and even when the bloodlust overcomes him his victims are generally chosen from a list of paul daniel's closest friends.
from 1998 to 2000 will grew a number of different plants and small trees on an allotment located on a roundabout on the a34 north of newbury. it is thought that this period of will's life would have taken him to the grave had it not been for the millenium computer bug, which killed all of the plants and left will distraught.
determined to bounce back however will moved to bristol and started a new life as a brain surgeon working for the top secret airbus military hospital. during this period he worked on brains of the famous and powerful, including george w bush and sir bobby robson. again tragedy was to befall him however as a series of incidents involving sugical equipment being left in patient's brains post op led to a swift dismissal and a large scale internal coverup.
his current location and occupation are unknown, though rumours persist that he is in the process of collecting a series of vehicles that fit inside each other like matryoshka dolls."
I am artistic, social, and egregious