im not sure what im looking for, but i do know that i need to get out and have more fun.

a few things: i am pagan, but i am not a crazy hippie, i do not wear a cape, i am very private about my spiritual beliefs. i am interested in men and women and everything in between. i might want to get married someday, but i have not yet sown all my wild oats. i dont know what the hell im doing with my life, if that bothers you, you need to look elsewhere. i like gaming but i dont play anything right now. i love all kinds of food, and beer, and bloody marys. i am VERY into fashion and you may consider me materialistic.... i work in retail and i love shopping, i hope you can handle that. i can be a very girly girl. i am a plus sized girl and proud of it. i have worked in plus size retail and i love my big girl friends. im very comfortable with my body and have very little patience for people who are not. my passion is for ethnic studies, social change, the arts and "culture" in general, for more info on that read on.

i went to st cloud state university for 3 1/2 years as a creative writing major. one semester off turned into more than i'd like, but im planning on going back spring of '10. when i left i was majoring in fine arts and humanities and minoring in ethnic studies, which im really passionate about. i was planning on doing something like arranging funding and booking events for an art collective for people of color, whether it's professional artists, writers and performers or maybe students of color or something. something along those lines. or working for a major company and doing diversity training. or travelling and researching and writing. or writing a screenplay. writing is what ive always wanted to do and no matter where my life takes me i'll always encorperate writing somehow. i want to write the story of my adolescence, i think my experiences could be helpful to boys and girls growing up.
truthfully im interested in so many things that im not even sure what im going to go back to school for. now im thinking maybe art history? im a bit of a lost soul, i still spend most of my time wandering. all i know is i love learning and i felt wonderful when i was in school, taking classes that have really changed my life. i want to get back to that sense of passion and wonder.

i'm really interested in the intersection of race, gender and sexuality... you know, your basic liberal nerd. but i almost shudder when i apply the word "liberal" to myself, because it makes me think of some argumentative, ball-busting hippie bitch who wants to argue about politics all the time, which is so not me. so what i'm doing with my life... trying to improve it. i've been struggling with depression and social anxiety for the past couple of years and i'm trying to get it under control so i can enjoy my life more and be successful in school. it makes it hard for me to meet people, but i'm trying hard to meet new people, date, and have awesome experiences, because you're only young once and there's not much longer for me to get away with this shit. i am just chasing my own happiness.

marathoning tv shows. keeping lists. trying almost any kind of food. collaging *everything*. getting obsessed with things really quickly. finding cool, cheap clothes. cutting my own hair. not being shy about my sexuality. getting dressed up for no reason. self-analysis. i used to think i was good at writing, but now im not so sure.

probably what i'm wearing (dresses and skirts, platform shoes or boots, tons of jewellery), or something that i've done with my hair (its been shaved, spiked, dreaded, and lately blue or purple). my mom recently informed me that if i dont want people to stare at me, i should stop getting tattoos and shaving half my head. whatever! i dont do it for attention, i do it because it makes me feel good. *** everyone seems to say that people notice their boobs... i guess some people might notice mine? they aint bad. i dont hide em. they are adorned with an extremely nerdy, bright blue tattoo.

BOOKS: encompassing the three areas i enjoy: caitlin r kiernan, william gibson, harkuki murakami. COMICS: anything alan moore, grant morrison, neil gaiman, buffy comics. MOVIES: the prestige, the darjeeling limited, eternal sunshine, superbad, doubt, the ring, the shining. TV SHOWS: buffy, angel, lost, the l word, veronica mars, house, dexter, criminal minds, its always sunny in philadelphia, no reservations. MUSIC: i'm really trying to get into different things now. mix cds are my babies. i find i listen to a lot of KMFDM, pzychobitch, missy elliot, theSTART, electric six, mindless self indulgence, MIA, nine inch nails, the dresden dolls, lady gaga ... a fuck of a lot more. FOOD: i could eat mexican or chinese every day. i love taco bell, chipotle, leann chin, chinese buffets, mongolian bbqs. and i LOVE perkins. i love cheap and fast food.

my computer (which allows me to have everything i've written, be able to write more, and have all my favorite music and pictures of pretty people), comics, cute shoes, sex toys, art, and tacos.

i also spend a lot of time thinking about sex, pretty boys and girls, what i'm going to wear tomorrow, things i want to do with my life, fictional universes, food, my crazy dreams. too much time worrying about what other people think. what im having for dinner. needing a mocha/diet coke. etc.

hanging out with my friends, watching lost/dexter/whatever, going to perkins at 2 am, or getting fancied up and going to walmart to buy makeup and shoes. i dont go out nearly as often as a 25 year old should. i like the kind of bars you can sit down and talk at. in st cloud i mostly like the martini bar or the tavern. and perkins MUST FOLLOW.

i have pierced nipples. it is not a big deal.
i also work in an adult store, which is sometimes weird or cool, but by now just a bizarre kind of normalcy.
im really interested in all things "adult," i do find it pretty fascinating.

you like boys who look like girls or girls who look like boys, you're proud of your nerdiness, you aren't snobbish about being alternative/queer/intellectual. *** i am very interested in dating a transguy or transgirl. im quite down with that.***i like to date someone who is concerned about their appearance, likes to dress up to go out. an alternative take on fashion is VERY appriciated. this goes for men and women. *** im on the fence about whether i want to be brutally honest [and REALLY bitchy] and make a list of people who i am not interested in. if you think i should do this, or you would like a list of these characteristics, please ask as it is really funny. unless, of course, i am describing you.