Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

perhaps the most important thing that Needs Telling at this point is that i'm transgendered. pre-/non op; small breasts and penis. if you want to know more, i recommend resort to google.

i'm a professional civil service drone. i'm 36 and it's effing Odd. had someone made a bet with me on the length of my lifespan, i would have lost. like ten years ago.

my life has gotten progressively stranger over the past twenty years or so. i'm a thelemite, or at least i'm called that, and that's the driving force in my life. some people might think that's kind of strange. i know i sure do.

what's strange about it, or what Seems strange about it, at least, are the apparently bizarre decisions i make with my life. i move to cities for no apparent reason. i am perfectly happy living on a mattress on the floor if i have a decent temple to work in. i'd rather get a book than eat.

my personal library is typically a jaw-dropping experience for people. my tastes have gotten so obscure that i'm reduced to printing and binding texts myself.

i'm vain enough to have maintained a weblog for some years, and prone enough to engendering fits of Mad Drama in others that i deleted it.

personally, though, i'm extremely low drama. i just don't care enough about the things that most people consider important to get too excited about most people's issues. the only major exception to that is politics. while i believe that spacial metaphors are woefully inappropriate to describe one's views, it would be fair to say that i'm so far to the left that i've nearly gone straight through to the other side on some issues. philosophically, i'm an anarchist. functionally, i'm a democrat.

. I would have started all this sooner but I spent too much time on Phish tour to really have a sex change at the same time.

i ride my bike a Whole Awful Lot in all manner of ridiculous weather. i am also one of nature's pedestrians.

what else?

at the moment i'm completely unattached, emotionally, although i do have a few partners i occasionally perform sex magick with. this is often a problem when it comes to dating non-thelemites. jealousy, in my experience, is something that happens to other people. unfortunately, it often happens to the one's i'm sleeping with...

Love is the law, love under will.

fighting the neoconservatives and generally doing my Will. sometimes I play the guitar. O.T.O. work. Magick. That's plenty.

after about ten straight years of completely avoiding the company of magicians in general and thelemites specifically, I've found myself embroiled in the A.'.A.'. and in one of the last remaining legitimate organs of O.T.O. Indeed, do many things come to pass.

I think there's something about magick that makes some people take themselves just Way Too Seriously. I've fallen into that trap myself a few times.

magick. sometimes i'm really good at playing the guitar. making people laugh, and, oddly, making people feel comfortable around me.

Editors

• nar55555

it depends. sometimes they notice that i'm riding my bike down 5th avenue in rush hour traffic, claiming an entire lane for myself and chasing cars that honk or make rude gestures at me. sometimes they notice that i dress like a refugee from an early nineties cure show.

occasionally, people even notice that i'm transgendered, but that doesn't actually happen anywhere near as often as i would have thought before transitioning.

Hmmm... Michael Moorcock, Terry Pratchett, Glenn Cook, Aleister Crowley, Fredericks of Hollywood (wait does that count?), Giles Deleuze, WDET, WYEP, Phish, Beastie Boys, Grateful Dead, Vegetarian and Vegan Food, Howard Zinn, moe, coffee, trey anastasio, ani difranco, rare earth, pete seeger, anything interesting on kabala, thelema, ceremonial magick or magick in general, the sims, NPR, can, steve kimock, homestar runner, herman hesse, final fantasy games, drinking really good beer, spicy food, jalapenos, tori amos, Joy Division, Bjork, the cure, switchblade symphony, depeche mode, rasputina, Squarepusher, Sisters of Mercy, cruxshadows, annoying the hoi-poloi...this category is silly. How about renaming it "my favorite stuff?" That's what it is from now on, okay? Here's more.

environmental activism, not answering my phone when I'm fairly certain it's my credit card company threatening to "get the lawyers," going to see live music, media reform, vegetarian food, christian baiting, shaking my fist at an uncaring sky...I'll put more on here as I think of it. I swear.

This question annoys me on a philosophical level. I want to say things like "Ummm...a heartbeat, air and stuff." but that doesn't do anything to help you get to know me.

So I'm going to be cheesy and use this space as the "What I'm Looking For" portion of the show. I'm really looking for a nice, interesting person who's comfortable with the fact that I'm transgendered but isn't -only- interested in me because I'm transgendered.

I'd like to meet someone who's seriously interested in music - preferably a musician, although that's not critical. And definitely someone who tell me what's up with them and what they're thinking 'cause I ain't no dentist and I don't pull teeth. Keep me wondering and you'll wonder where I went.

it's also worth noting that if you identify with christian, islamic or jewish religions, then just don't even bother. i'm not a big fan of hindus, either, and buddhists just make me want to puke. life is sorrow? F*CK that.

atheists, pagans, agnostics, various "minor" religions (i mean smaller ones), anything like that is fine. i usually do best with other thelemites, but it's not a requirement.

scientologists are Dead Out, though. bugger all that nonsense.

...stuff that most people don't give a rat's ass in a rainstorm about

it may be important to note that open relationships are a Must. i shy away from the term "polyamoury," for a number of reasons, not the least of which is that i can never remember how to spell it, but also on account of the people who seem to have popularized the term typically aren't people that i'd "amour" with.

what we need, friends and neighbors, is a new effing word.

i think, for now, that i'll just go with "Loose." i can live with Loose. i mean, hey, it Sounds like fun, right?

Out if it's payday friday, in if it isn't.

sometimes i think i don't care about other people. i spend a lot of time inside my head, it seems, sort of half-talking to myself and a few others who occasionally inhabit the region. i'll forget that there are other people around and just space/zone out.

Some people tell me that I'm an aggressive person. I think that means that when someone catches my interest, I follow up on it. That puts some people off, but if you're not put off by someone who doesn't make you guess whether she's into you or not, then by all means, drop me a line.

just because i'm Loose doesn't mean I'm not intense in relationships. It also doesn't mean that I don't have any class and like to be treated poorly. If we go out someplace, We are going out someplace. Not me and you and the person you meet while we're out. Get their phone number. Have a date with them later. That's all good. Do not, for example, leave me someplace without a word to have sex with them in a gods-be-damned bathroom in oakland if you expect to see me again.

People actually do that.

You should only message me if you're going to send something other than "ughugh do me" and a picture of your genitals.

I swear, people actually do that.

Seriously, at least make me Think you read my profile, even if you didn't. Don't say "hey wht's up wnna chat?" and Please don't send a message with a single monosyllable.

Oh, and if you're the kind of person that gets involved with someone and then never tells them what's going on with you and where your boundaries are with a relationship, don't bother. Been there, done it, it ain't no fun.

i am Not into long distance crap. i once "dated" a guy for nearly a year and half and never saw him Once in that entire time. never again.

you should definitely message me if you can hang with Liber Oz.

Basically, you should message me if you find me interesting. i may send you a message back and i may not. if there are things about you that are clearly weird or Other Than Mainstream i'll likely message you back.

it would be really nice to be surprised by this site for a change.