I was recently described as, "classic but willing to experiment" and it fits me well. A fun loving, first date paying, traditional American boy all grown up. Lived in Philly long enough for it to feel like home, but still daydreaming of other locales. Overall its been good , but still love finding new things. I'm goofy and occaasinally highly rational, I enjoy explaining things but know that a lot of times when people are bitch ing they really just want to vent and not an explaination. Finding someone special isn't about finding the prettiest girl; I want to find a woman who's as impressive to talk to as they are to look at.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm an international jewel thief with a heart of gold, trying to
avenge my father's death and finally break free from this life of
intrigue and danger. Along the way, I plan on becoming a
professional brewer, getting a Masters degree in political science,
and teaching English overseas.
I’m really good at
Telling inappropriate jokes...like this. Jack, John, and Jill get
shipwrecked on a desert island. They find food, water, make
shelter, etc. After a few weeks they realize they may not be
getting rescued. Over time, men and women start to do, what men and
women do when theyre stuck together... One morning Jill wakes up
and says to herself, "This isnt right. I love two different men. I
feel so guilty. I cant keep living this way." and she goes to the
top of a mountain, throws herself off and dies. Jack and John wake
up, they search for Jill, eventually they find her, and are both
heartbroken... But time goes on, and Jack and John are still stuck
on this island together. Over time, men start to do what men do
when they are stuck together. Well a few weeks later Jack wakes up
and says to John, "This isnt right. I feel so guilty. I cant keep
living this way." and John replies, "Youre right. I think we need
to bury Jill."
The first things people usually notice about me
My glasses, then my eyes.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Steinbeck, Vonnegut, Eggers, Klosterman, Ellis, King, Niven,
Movies: Run Ronnie Run, Old Boy, Old Zombie movies, Jiro Dreams of
Sushi, Moonrise kingdom, Wet Hot American Summer, New Zombie
Movies, Caddyshack, Johnny Dangerously, In Brouges,
Comedy Shows: Henry Rollins, David Cross, Daniel Tosh, Ron
TV Shows: Mindy Project, Futurama, Arrested Development,
Workaholics, Archer, Walking Dead, 30 Rock, Colbert Report, Wire,
Star Wars Clone Wars, Firefly, Deadwood, Rome, Breaking Bad,
Food: I dont eat seafood. For realsies.
The six things I could never do without
Glasses, cell, too many ties, the internet, my sense of humor, an
idea of how really good life can be.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
What it is I'm supposed to do with my life. Being happy is so easy,
and yet sometimes it seems so hard. I have a challenging job, and
I'm really good at it, but there's a lot more to life, and Im not
as good at those things. ( heh, why am I on a dating site? )
also, Zombie apocalypse.
On a typical Friday night I am
At Bob and Barbras, listeing to jazz, playing Pacman, and
trashtalking against the ghosts. One of my favorite memories
involved a friend and I who got so into the trash talking that we
ended up with a dozen people rooting us on, "Ohhh"ing and "Ahhh"
ing as we played pacman. Weird, but awesome.
Also, just laying in bed and watching netflix. telling myself I
should go out and "live life to the fullest" but feeling like some
of the best times are just laying in bed.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have a botched tattoo. Its ok, I got a refund for it. It was supposed to be a 12-inch ruler on my penis, but the guy ran out of room just before he got to two.
FYI I don't believe anyone who messages me is actually real until I meet them. So if I treat you like you may be an attractive woman OR you may also be a guy in a third world country trying to scam me for money OR you may be a guy in a first world country who just wants to lock me in their basement "bring out the gimp" style OR a computer program that's designed to get me to navigate to specific websites don't be offended.
You should message me if
You like guys with glasses, or semi-upstanding citizens, or a guy who holds doors not just for his date but for old ladies too, or if you laughed at the necrophiliac joke in my "Im really good at" section.