Someone who fails the half your age plus 7 test communicates that she was hoping we could chat. Her profile features a single picture, Lauren age 24 from Houston, with her eyelids painted blue and her tongue stuck out.

Trying not to be too snarky here, I shoot back the following:

If we were to chat the first 3 things that come to mind are to ask why you're interested in a man from DC (since your profile says Houston)?

Has any man closer to your age than your father's age advised you to not stick out your tongue unless you mean to use it?

What are the first 3 things that come to your mind, assuming a girl from Texas younger than my daughter could actually say something worth my attention?

I have yahoo messenger and digits if I like your answer well enough.

Answers I DON'T like go something like "my really hot pictures are on this other site besides tagged that just needs my card number to verify I'm 18. "

The profile says I'm 48, I say I'm  48, and if you're not woman enough to take my word on that, I'm not sorry. Not trying to be ignorant, just factual. I play honestly.

Another bad move is to have a social profile in other than  your name. I'm Barry and I'm taking your word you're actually Lauren from Houston.

OK so that's my 2 cents. Remember free advice is worth it.

Namaste

I find myself in a position where I can share certain enhancements to quality of life for a lady whose presence would enhance my quality of life. So I posted the second picture from the top in my profile, a picture of my little girls and a picture of Joan Jett along with the following on Craigslist men seeking women : When a female coworker who is a fashion major tells you that you have The setup to this is I was coming back from lunch to work, and she ( 23 so too young by far for my 46 ) asked me if I was a model on another job. The truth is I was just listening to a tune on my ipod from when I was about her age ( France Jolie' s Come To Me, to get down to specifics. ) and feeling good for being a guy of middle years with a job, and a full belly and a place to lay his head at night without pressing worries about maintaining that status. If the disco tune made me put on a catwalk sort of gait, I just happen to be very affected by my personal soundtracking. About me: 6'5" 260, more into gothy type women than young sistas like my coworker. Respectfully disagree with conservative mindsets, but am by no means loony left. Cat, 420, brown liquor before labor day friendly. Ipod shuffles from Hole to Mason Proffit to Stabbing Westward to Live to ZZ Top to Doors, so let that influence your decision to send a picture. These 3 shots are me, my actual cats, and a girl that I really like the looks of. If you're straight up about wanting to meet, get in touch as long as you're not a bot, a hooker, or not fitting my personal aesthetic. So a few days later, I'd almost forgotten posting it, when a lady e mails me... Subject: i AM IDENTICAL to joan jett..... ...except i like doing it with guys... well, i must admit, you got me w/ the 6'5" and the stuff on your shuffle. mine is similarly diverse... 40+, 5'7", hwp, VERY curvy, rocker chic, well read, well travelled, funny, a little naughty. kind and sweet anarchist (yes, a dichotomy), returning student type. curious? You know I was so I wrote back a series of things I was curious about, and got back an e-mail with a phone number. Just to make sure of a good time to call, I responded like this: Is that phone number where you work or your cell? When is a good time to call? And are there more pictures of you? Talk to you soon Just about 20 minutes later as I am brusing teeth and bailing out of the door to head to work, she writes back and says # is my cell, home right now if you'd like to utilize. I have to be at work at three myself... So I call. Voicemail. There is a great debate as her outgoing spiel plays whether or not to leave a message, or just try again later. I go for the combination leave a message, try after work, get voicemail again and e mail route. Was getting teeth brushed and out the door for work when it came in you were home. Called and left a message, but I guess you must have been getting ready for work at the time too. Hope it was a good day. Mine was alright, and now thankfully over. Time to whip up some dinner now that the cats are taken care of. Slept on it, went to work, and called the same time she had e mailed she was home the day before. Voicemail again. That also added up to the 3 calls and no response that old school guys like me take as barking up the wrong tree. So she calls while I'm at work and leaves voicemail that I'm not, with some date suggestions, and I'm thinking ok, call while on the way home. We're chatting about things, and then her roommate comes in and needs her help bringing in groceries. So I say sure, she can call me right back. 2 hours go by, no call. So I call her. Voicemail. Figuring I'm barking up the wrong tree, I e-mail the following... Did I say something wrong, did you get frightened, or did your roommate and you get into something? If so, are you ok behind it? I just don't want to be the guy that calls too much and spooks you in any way. Not who I am or why I posted. Let me know if I should keep or lose the phone number, and if it's keep, what are your dealbreakers, other than the obvious peril to your sobriety and dishonesty? I can see where impatience might possibly be one, and I've been working on that. If it's lose, have a nice life and take good care of Keb Mo Kitty Smush Face. Peace out, Barry Cue Eric Clapton's "Why does Love have to hurt so bad...."