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tao-te

61 M Beaverton, OR

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Asian
Height
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Athletic
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Buddhism, and laughing about it
Sign
Cancer, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from masters program
Job
Other
Income
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Has kids, but doesn’t want more
Pets
Has dogs
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
A lot of people here are unsure about this online dating process. I think this quote captures how the online dating process is backwards: "An online profile is like reading the ingredients on a box of food and trying to imagine what it would taste like." So take my ingredients with a grain of salt ;-).

Speaking of food metaphors...I take the spaghetti approach to dating, i.e. throw it on the wall and see if it sticks. Just try it out and see. I am not looking for perfection, just someone who appreciates me and I appreciate in turn. I am willing to try and am open to the possibilities (throwing on the wall) and if someone "sticks" then that's great.

I embrace the life philosophy that we live from love or fear. I live consciously from love. I am not always consistent or mindful and I recognize that. I want a mate that does too. I want us to find our common humaness and in turn, our heart. Come join me and take the risk.

I view life and relationships the same, don't sweat the small stuff. For if there is a willingness to be in our hearts and to be connected then things can be worked out and life can be enjoyed.

I have been described as kind, grounded, open, honest, intelligent, empathetic, calm, centered, and positive.

I don't really have a "go to" thing to do. I enjoy being physically active, emotionally connected, and intellectually engaged so that can cover a variety of things. I am up for most anything for it is the company I share that is important to me more so than the activity.

I like this article on the criteria of finding the right person...
How to End Up with the Right Relationship:
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/insight/201404/how-end-the-right-partner
...
"When you do find that sincere, humble, fair-minded person, you might be shocked to discover how sexy he or she is. It might be overwhelming to finally share a passion based on discovering the person in front of you—free from the conventional gender roles and judgments. There is nothing to fear, however, because the formula for communicating remains simple: You always mean what you say."
What I’m doing with my life
I am a technology project manager but that's not my heart's work. In my exploration what I really should be doing with my life on this planet. I am going down this path of learning a healing process that involves mind, body and spirit. I find it a powerful modality for I experienced a miracle from it myself. Now I am investigating how I can bring it to others.

I like being active whether it is in the gym, outside running, hiking or biking with a friend, or walking my sweet dog. I also love listening to live music during our great outdoor summer concert season. I also like museums, art galleries, funky shops, parks, bowling, street festivals, pubs, indie movies, going out to eat,...

Basically I'm up to do most anything as long as i get to do it with fun people.

I don't consider myself a runner but did finish a half marathon late last year which I am proud of since I only have been running for 5 months before I did it. My dog Bodhi gets to run with me as well.

I love open hearted and authentic connection with people. I look to contribute in making world a better place; it can be as small as reaching out to a friend or expressing gratitude to a service worker for their work. Mother Teresa said, “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”
I’m really good at
Listening. I really am curious about people. I love authentic connection between two people who are willing to share our lives. I find it is my gift to the people I am present with.

I also very good at dancing wildly with abandon to R&B/soul/funk/African beat music. I love to "Dance like nobody is watching." I just LOVE this video for speaks to all of us who has the music and dance within us and we ALL should let it out! https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=525666190803173&fref=nf

I give a real good massage.
The first things people usually notice about me
That I am intelligent and a good listener. Physically I've been told I got great shoulders and a nice tush.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I got to see The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel during the 2 hours of laying down as I was giving my blood platelets. It was a very sweet movie. I thought this was a relevant movie quote for us here on OKC:
Carol: You haven't met anyone?
Madge Hardcastle: Single by choice. Just not my choice

Another Indian film, The Lunch Box was a nice, low key, sweet romantic movie.

I want to see Frozen and sing-a-long with the movie. I will wait so we can do this together.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0MK7qz13bU

I read books on communication and pop neuroscience books "Thinking Fast and Slow," "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking." As an introvert myself, I liked how the book validated my introverted talents.

Right now I got "Predictably Irrational, Revised and Expanded Edition: The Hidden Forces That Shape Our Decisions" which is about behavioral economics. I am fascinated how we behave and why. I especially love to understand how we are illogical (see above on Thinking Fast and Slow as another book about that).

I have read "The Trauma of Everyday Life" by Mark Epstein. He came to talk at Powell's. I love how he explains how Buddhism philosophy helps us and is in alignment of modern psychotherapy (Epstein is a psychiatrist and a Buddhist).

Music? I love Afro-pop and most any kind of percussion type bootie shaking music. R&B especially with a horn section like Soul Vaccination or 5 Guys Named Moe or Patrick Lamb, fusion jazz, and indie pop/rock. I think that the Waterfront Blues Festival is the best bargain bar none. There is no such thing as bad music anytime there.

Food? Most anything. Given a preference, I like spicy. Pizza I can eat every day especially wood fired pizza. What I don't like is Pho', some Korean, and Moroccan (well that spongy bread...). Indian, Greek, Middle Eastern, Thai, and of course Japanese are all great.
The six things I could never do without
beyond the usual conventional things like love, family-friends, health, ...
1. the Internet - I love connecting this way. This is an amazing technology where I get to communicate with people that I would have never would have "met" otherwise.
2. Optimism and faith - I would have never gotten this far in life without these two things. I have a hopeful belief in the Divine. ""Everything will be all right in the end... if it's not all right then it's not yet the end." which is from The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel movie.
3. Physical touch is my primary Love Language (see Gary Chapman's book, The 5 Love Languages). I just love giving and receiving hugs. I hug all my friends, male and female.
4. Being physically active and healthy. Being in touch with my body and feeling it is important as well as feeling strong (that's relative for it is more of a sense than actual muscles for me). I run and do gym workouts daily.
5. Laughing - especially with my kids for they just crack me up. They are true beings of Light. I also do the ironic laugh (laughing inside).
6. My comfortable bed especially with flannel or fleece sheets, very comfy.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I wonder about chemistry. Upon reflection of the rare occasions that I have experienced that chemistry, I have distilled it down to how the woman opens up to me. I find myself really getting attracted to her when she does that. When she puts her caution aside, lets her barriers down, become vulnerable and open and let her preciousness out then I find myself having that special attraction to her. The clincher would be how we kiss.

I also wonder how we are with each other when looking for a mate. This really helps me understand the skittishness I encounter: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/compassion-matters/201401/7-reasons-most-people-are-afraid-love

Basically I am working on living a more conscious and meaningful life that involves kindness and joy.
On a typical Friday night I am
Usually I look to get out to do a MeetUp or be with a friend. Otherwise I just do a hard workout and recover at home watching Netflix. Ideally I would be in relationship and share that time with you.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I cry at chick flicks and I cry when I talk about my kids.
The only time I swear is when I am doing home repair projects and not very often at that.
I use flannel sheets all year even during the Summer.
I don't need to drink in order to sing karaoke but i admit, it does help.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 40–64
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
anything I say resonates with you. Who knows? Maybe we can actually meet, connect and have some chemistry! Wow, what a concept *grin*!

Here's why I would rather talk and meet rather than exchanging prolong emails: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/unconscious-branding/201407/why-email-is-only-7-percent-effective-talking