"I have passed the test, just like all the rest, but never really understood the reasons why I took it in the first place."

Recently moved back to Utah after a failed experiment with Portland.

I'm generally very reserved until I'm comfortable in my surroundings, unless prompted or cornered. I'll tend to be fairly quiet or hang out near the people I know in a large, unfamiliar social situation until something presents itself as a good opportunity to make a joke or set someone straight. I try not to be a jerk to people that don't deserve it. People tend to think I'm either pretty funny or pretty mean depending on how developed their sense of humor is.

I'm not very good with talking about myself on the spot so feel free to ask about whatever.

Having as much fun as I can manage without sacrificing my sanity (well, not all of it anyway).

Making people laugh.

Calling out things as I see them (which adds to the making people laugh).

The roommates I had in Portland have also accused me of making the best bloody mary this side of the Orion nebula.

80's and 90's pop-culture references. Television, music, movies, what-have-you. I can't help it if the way somebody at the concert decided to stagedive reminds me to say out loud "that's a damn shame when people be throwin' away a perfectly good white boy like that." It's going to happen. Just try and bear with me.

Overwording OKC profiles to get 100% profile completion. (mission success)

My curvaceous morals.
How should I know what random people first notice. Why don't YOU tell ME what you noticed first?

...now that I think about it, my sarcasm is pretty obvious

My favorite author growing up was Roald Dahl and continues to stay at the top of a short list of writers I care to mention by name, which also includes Shel Silverstein and Carl Sagan.

Movies: The Point, Better Off Dead, High Fidelity, V for Vendetta, Batman Begins, Labyrinth, Office Space, Dazed and Confused, American History X, American Psycho, Empire Records

Music is another story. I grew up punk in Salt Lake (SLC Punk was made for a reason) and continue to go to punk shows. I have a Social Distortion tattoo on my shin so you can hopefully guess some bands I'd be into. I listen to a lot of drum and bass, hiphop, metal, breakbeats, house, jazz, trip-hop, downtempo funk, ska, rap, rock, and amalgamations of any of the above. My last.fm is http://www.last.fm/user/tardhat/ if you care much about music (and I kind of hope you do or we'll have to find strange new things to discuss as an icebreaker)
Specific artists to rattle off since I don't honestly expect you to go check out my last.fm on the first glance here: A Tribe Called Quest, Acid Bath, Aesop Rock, AFI, Against All Authority, Aphex Twin, Bad Religion, Ben Folds (Five), Blackalicious, Bob Marley, Bouncing Souls, Cake, The Clash, De La Soul, Dead Kennedys, Dead Prez, Dillinger Escape Plan, DJ Krush, Eels, Face to Face, The Flaming Lips, Flogging Molly, Goldfinger, Good Riddance, High Contrast, House of Pain, Imogen Heap, Jaga Jazzist, James Brown, Jamiroquai, KJ Sawka, Less Than Jake, LJT Bukem, Meat Beat Manifesto, MGMT, Minor Threat, The Misfits, Modest Mouse, Mos Def, NOFX, Oingo Boingo, One Man Army, Operation Ivy, Ozomatli, Pantera, Pennywise, Pilfers, The Prodigy, Quarashi, Rage Against the Machine, Rancid, Refused, Reverend Horton Heat, Sage Francis, Sigur Ros, Slayer, Sneaker Pimps, Social Distortion (refer to my shin), Soul Coughing, Sublime, The Vandals, Thievery Corporation, Venetian Snares, Voodoo Glow Skulls, Way Out West, World/Inferno Friendship Society, Wu-Tang Clan, Z-trip

In general I listen to most things but contemporary country. That shit is just terrible RnB with steel guitars and bad hats.

I put Tapatio on just about everything.

My friends.

The Internet (it is serious business)

My computer(s). It gives me access to the internet, and a means to communicate with all you lovely people (and play video games, and watch porn (let's be honest here, right?), and borrow intellectual property on a trial basis so I can decide if it's worth paying for) through said Internet. Also choosing my computer here allows me to skip listing 9 other things since music and movies and such are all contained therein.

My car. Not specifically the car that I own right now, or a car I have previously owned, but my freedom to throw everything I can fit into it and drive a thousand miles away and see what happens.

"Bad weather" I am truly happier when it's snowing than any other time. Barring snow, I really enjoy the rain. I like to jury rig little shelters up and sleep in the rain when I can. I've tried sleeping directly in the rain but realized that the rain falling on my eyes is quite bothersome and doesn't allow me to get the refreshing nap I was hoping for. I *have* remedied this by putting my ski goggles on and doing it anyway.

Sleep. Seriously, I love to sleep. I don't do it during the week because I also love to get wrapped up in conversations for far too long. But when that weekend hits, if I don't have anything to do, and no one calls to wake me up, expect your "good morning, what are we doing today?" text around 18:30.

...all that said, I've been known to take off into the mountains for a few days alone so I don't know that there's really anything I could NEVER do without. Just things I'd prefer not to be without for extend periods of time.

Why OKC seems to think all the best friend matches for me on here are feminist bisexuals, or lesbians. I'm starting to think maybe I really AM a lesbian trapped in a man's body. And not in that "lol it's a cool pick-up line 'cuz that means I like pussy like gay chicks like pussy, lol get it? lol!" sort of way.
That or feminist bisexuals/lesbians really like good music.

...Ok, so, maybe I don't spend a lot of time thinking about that but it was on my mind when I came back to edit this thing for more word content (can't stop at 80%. I mean, that's what, a B-?)

The first thing I do when arriving at a new profile on here is look to see what music you listed.

I'm not very private if you actually ask.
But I learned a very long time ago that a good part of staying out of trouble is not offering up any information that wasn't asked for.

You'd like to help me have a good time.
Whether that means going out for a drink, or driving around blasting music through the hillside with the sunroof open (Your car or mine isn't too important. Mine has heated seats, an ipod hookup, and 11 speakers though. :3), or watching a movie, or going for a hike or any other number of other things is up to you. I'm pretty easy to please as long as the company is good.

Or if you need more people on your buddy lists on whichever IM clients you run to harass about menial crap at 2AM because no one else is online.