Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Who am I?
Being a casual libertine is all about valuing and celebrating human
interaction. The sexy stuff just happens as a side effect.
I had a wild youth, so I'll be able to match you story for story if
you want, but these days I stay healthy, eat right, and while I'll
still debauch, I find that a very occasional drink early in the
evening is my limit if I want to wake up sharp the next morning.
Partners who put effort into staying healthy, and can keep up, are
my ideal choice.
I'm single right now, but still open to ongoing romantic
connections. After all, everything gets better the more intimately
you know someone. Some of my most interesting friendships started
as casual hookups; we give each other relationship advice and
support even though we're no longer intimate. It's nice.
I hate that it has to be explicitly stated, but I've done the
ethical poly workshops. I understand the concept, process well, and
consider myself a fellow traveler, I'm just no longer that earnest
a revolutionary. For me, the revolution is the dancing (if you
recognize that misquote, we should talk).
Who are you?
It's snarky to say that this section has yet to be determined, but
dating should be about broadening one's perspective, and reaching
out to people you'll learn from. We can be each other's funhouse
mirror, and the more different we are, the more interesting the
I'm a strong believer that difference doesn't equal
incompatibility, but some common ground helps. It would be great
if; you really do want to get out and about, you're fascinated with
human behavior, and you genuinely enjoy analyzing life almost to
death. For all of this, an active life of the mind is the only
I love it when people comment on their match questions. I'd always
thought of book burning/flag burning as a simple left wing/right
wing litmus test. Recently, one of my matches commented that
regardless of politics, books have a real utility, flags are just a
symbol, so book burning is more wrong. Original thinking,
regardless of whether I agree. It was the reason that I messaged
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I spent many years devoting my energy to the program I ran for a
local nonprofit, and watched the organization grow from a handful
of iconoclasts meeting in the back room of a Chinese restaurant to
a stable power in local politics. The revolution has mainstreamed,
and it was time to move on. I run a small business, try to do right
by my customers and employees, and maybe get things done by closing
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Jack of all trades, master of none. That's always held an appeal
for me. In just about every area I can quantify ;-) I'm slightly
above the 75th percentile. I'm comfortable with that.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Damn, I'm hoping it's not the one thing I'm insecure about.
If we're talking physical attributes, I'm told that I have
noticeably well defined arms and shoulders.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I really like a nice walk around town. I've lived in San Francisco
most of my adult life and still manage to find something new around
most corners. Stopping into a little place that makes interesting
food - doesn't matter what kind - in whatever neighborhood I end up
in, is a favorite. Doing it with a friend is more than twice as
I ride a bike. Bicycling has been so much a part of my professional
life for so long that I sometimes forget how much it's shaped me,
physically and mentally. I'm looking forward to doing a couple of
short bicycle tours to my favorite local spots when I can.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
The Internet. I think that covers all six in one go. I admit to
reading for about 4 hours a day, yet having almost no books in the
house. Wikipedia is my best friend and I'm looking forward to the
It took a while, but I've just about read through all the stuff
that interests me in the SFPL Main library.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Why OKC forces me to choose between Mostly vegetarian and Strictly
vegetarian. I've always taken Strictly to mean Vegan, and Mostly to
mean not really. I eat cheese and eggs. I don't care what you eat,
but I guarantee you'll like what I cook.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I'm a seriously early riser, so unless I nap all afternoon, on
Friday night, I'm probably asleep.
I try to zig when others zag. I keep a nonstandard work schedule so
that I can shop when the lines are shorter, commute when the
streets are empty, and...
Oh crap, party when there's nobody at the club.
On the other hand, thank goodness for SF's service economy
schedule, because there's always somebody partying in the middle of
the week. On Wednesdays and Thursdays, you can often find me out
and about, dancing with myself quite unironically .
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
A little schadenfreude. I'll admit to being tickled when I notice
that someone with a really high enemy percent has clicked on my
profile and imagine their discomfort while reading some of my match
OK, fine. I'm a little bit kinky too, but I've softpedaled it here.
I know how to use a flogger and rope, but chain and complicated
fantasy play are my passion. I'm no stranger to play parties, and
I'm very good at sharing. Mission Control is a favorite.
Ask about my fl activity if you're interested.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
On sending the first message
Just because I don't send you a message doesn't mean I'm not
interested. It just means that absent the equivalent of a
smoldering gaze across a crowded room I can't tell if you are. Do
with that what you will, but I'd love to hear from you, I won't
take it to mean more than it does.
Note that I'm NOT waiting around by the computer for someone to
fall into my lap. If you're not going to make the first move,
you'll be more likely to interact with me at local events. See
"most private thing..." section for hints on what they might be.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.