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31 M Austin, TX

My Details

Last Online
Today – 7:39pm
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and has cats

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Just an ancient demi-god from a long forgotten cult of cat worshippers. Lookin' for love and a sacrifice before the blood orgy.

My anaconda don't
unless you got
puns, hon.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Going to a stage somewhere.

Special of the week:
Vegan beet n' bean burger, heirlooms, almond, spinach, carrot butter on a house sesame bun.
Asparagus frites, veganaise
Pickled veg: turnip, parsnip, cippolini, tomato

I have a mind for cooking.

I took an occupational arrow to the knee in Cleveland, moved here in October to work through some growing debt. Yes, I'm currently shacked up with my parents. It's not permanent, and I promise, I am a high-functioning human adult. With a lotta bills.

Yeah I know that last bit is a total bummer, but I refuse to believe it renders me undateable, so politely: don't be a dick.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Being right in the god damn way.

Staring uncomfortably until the silence is broken by a cacophony of wet, rippling farts.

Cats. It's a thing you can be good at.

Oh and I guess I can cook or something nbd.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The savage-eyed look of a grim mountain man and the smell of something feral.

"Excuse me, can you not…"
" gigantic, please?"

from friends:

"it's like david cross was hit with gamma radiation"

"you're a 300 level communicator"

"lotta surface area"

"your head is so fuckin' small"

her: "you know you look like you're always on the prowl, right?"
me: "like, 'animal hunting' prowl? or 'doing it' prowl?"
her: "both".


Ok so that last one was from my cat.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Fingering through Pepín's "Complete Techniques" right now. Various cooking/practical texts. I like short stories. O'Connor, Asimov, Gaiman, Poe. I've read a lot of seminal Poli-Sci books (Kingdon, Baumgartner/Jones, Alison/Zelikow, Peterson, Judt) and yet, now living in the south, I have yet to even touch V.O. Keys. Zinn is also a fave.

You can pick the music. I like all sorts, but I've consistently found myself dating people with good taste.

Top Gear. I have a thing for laughing at British idiots.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Two evil henchmen.
My colon.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Menu items, what to do for my master's, white privilege, lgbtq rights, socialism, anarchism, the effect of social media on news cycles, will Ferguson be a focusing event for policy a la Baumgartner/Jones, sex, body-positivity, not shaving, my next work out, androgyny, sex again.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Working. Being an idiot.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm queer. Pansexual. I've been poly for about five years now. No primary partner, though. S'bout it, I think.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–45
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If "they're, their, and there" doesn't appear in your profile. C'mon now, if that mattered, would you have *really* come to the internet for dating?

If you've got no hang-ups about dating a guy who (currently) shares the same kitchen with his parents.

You want to start a YouTube channel with me.