I do this thing where I keep talking until someone else starts talking. It's a bad habit. I do it even when I have nothing to talk about. This makes me sound crazy.
I'm really bad at returning phone calls. Sorry.
I read magazines backwards.
I love sports. I will play any and all sports. I will watch any and all sports. Except golf. If you like golf, go fuck yourself.
My favorite animal is the great white shark.
I hate Celine Dion and I don't know why.
I enjoy the smell of bengay, gasoline, and cigarette smoke in leather jackets. But my favorite is orange peels.
I use ellipses like they're going out of style...
I take borderline creepy pictures of children in public places.
I am a grammar nazi. If your message begins with "i am to into u", you are what's wrong with this country.
I usually could care less about what people think, but I make my bed every morning because I feel like I might die every time I leave the house.
Manners are a big fucking deal.
Chelsea Handler + Karen Walker + Robin Scherbatsky + Debra Morgan