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39 Oakland, CA Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–38
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Nov 24
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Aries, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from Ph.D program
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I am intelligent, educated, visionary, successful, and as modest as all hell. I find pleasure in writing and acting. I have a great sense of humour and eclectic tastes in music and entertainment. I discovered the Internet fifteen years ago and haven't really left it since. I'm generally happy in life and I am looking forward to finding out where it ends up taking me.

I am idealistic, thoughtful, and driven (you used to have to choose three adjectives to describe yourself on OkCupid; they're now just editable text, but I guess still apply.) I'm an INTJ.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I work for a non-profit organisation advocating for digital rights, based for the last five years in Southeast Asia, but now from a new organisation in the United States (but I'm Australian, that's why I write "organisation"). I have written a book and edited a few more. I travel a lot for work and pleasure. When at home, I occasionally do some acting for screen or stage for fun, and would like to have time to play some more PS3.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Writing, acting and coding.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Apparently I'm "fascinating". I'm not entirely sure why. Sometimes when they say that I feel like a particularly intriguing microbe being examined under a microscope. People often notice that I'm quiet and considerate, which is true but sounds boring. Once you get to know me, you'll find I'm actually anything but. I will spout on endlessly to you about the things I believe in, which are many, as I have a strong sense of fairness.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Frank Herbert, Greg Egan, William Gibson, Douglas Adams

Movies: David Lynch, Stanley Kubrick, Terry Gilliam, Charlie Kaufman, Christopher Nolan

TV: Doctor Who, Twin Peaks, The Prisoner, Neon Genesis Evangelion

Music: electronica, trip hop, jazz, latin

Foods: Malaysian, Mexican, Indian, Italian
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My MacBook, my iPhone (but I'm not an Apple fanboy - no, really), my DVDs, my family, my brain and sex.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Where I might be in five years' time. I am ambitious, and less risk-averse than most people. So three times I have left my job with nothing firm lined up to replace it, and so far it has turned out for the best - if not financially, then in terms of personal development. Money has never been my biggest driver; if anything, I suppose that achievement is: making a positive difference in the world.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
wondering where the week went. I've never really been one for drinking or clubbing on a weekend. I'm not that gregarious; I prefer to socialise in smaller groups with people I know well. I might be doing that on a Friday night, but more likely I will just be at home, with my computer on my lap and perhaps the TV on. Never in my life have I gone up to a stranger and asked them out. The prospect is both foreign and terrifying to me.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
By the time I turned 30 I had only had sex once.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I lent you something and you haven't returned it. Give it back, you bastard.

By the way, I am happily married to comedychick (whom I met on OkCupid in 2005 - much of this profile dates from then). However we practice polyamory and as such we are allowed to date others, so feel free to contact either of us. If you do though, then please follow through. One of my traits is reliability: if I say I'm going to do something, I do it. So I would rather you didn't contact me at all if you don't plan to reply to emails or to meet up when you say you will.

Have a nice day. :-)