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34 Los Angeles, CA Woman


I’m looking for

  • Men
  • Ages 32–45
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
5′ 6″ (1.68m)
Body Type
Mostly vegetarian
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of space camp
Entertainment / Media
Doesn’t have kids
Has dogs
English, Yiddish (Okay)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Los Feliz based art curator,writer, podcaster, casting producer, webseries host, and cult film loving obscenester.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Trying to make people laugh. Laughing at people.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Suddenly acquiring Victorian illnesses when I don't want to go places. Talking my way out of (aka splanin') whatever Lucille Ball-esque situation I've gotten myself in to.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'll be sure to walk up to the next stranger I see and ask.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Disinfo/Feral House/REsearch type stuff, The Invisibles, Shock Value by John Waters, Sebastian Horsley, Jerry Stahl, James Ellroy, Alan Moore, Tony O'neill. Mags like Juxtapoz and Vice.
Alejandro Jodorowsky, Federico Fellini, David Lynch, John Waters, Danger Diabolik, Sunset Blvd, Forbidden Zone, Ichi the Killer, Showgirls, Happiness Paris is Burning. Kid Stays in the Picture, and documentaries galore.
Coil, post-punk, 60's French pop, 80's synth pop, no wave, shoegaze, Joe Meek, The Cramps, Yma Sumac, The Raveonettes, Joy Division, Einstuerzende Neubauten, Nick Cave, Birthday Party, Grace Jones, Kraftwerk, KLF, Fad Gadget, Serge Gainsbourg, Marc and the Mambas, Suede , Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, Mr. Bungle,My Bloody Valentine, Magnetic Fields, Jesus & Mary Chain, Zola Jesus, This Mortal Coil, Antony and the Johnsons, Angelo Badalamenti, Dead or Alive, Cocteau Twins
Astronaut ice cream, it's like eating the future
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My dog
Lysol wipes
Robert Evans
Road trips
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
That I wish I had the technology to make the perfect hybrid man I would call Mike Patton Oswalt. Stranger danger. Does this Hypercolor shirt look good with my fanny pack? Perception vs. reality.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Writing my manifesto. Kneeling before Zod. Watching twerking tutorials on youtube so I can later put on my Dolly Parton costume and make my own video where I'm "twerking 9 to 5".
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I thought my screen name would come off as as funny but it's really just obnoxious. I suppose it's better than Suppositori Amos which I was also considering.

Sometimes I say things I don't really mean like "Why don't they get the methed out people from Intervention over to clean up the houses on Hoarders" and people take me seriously so I run with it.

I often space out while talking to boring people and come up with totally awesome ideas like this Pat Benetarded one where I convince all of my friends to dance in front of the Scientology Center in a flash mob I call "Love is a Battlefield Earth".

My father was both a urologist and psychiatrist so everything about my childhood was nuts.

At parties I often like to let people guess what I do for a living after they ask. Most usually guess hairdresser or dominatrix of which I am neither. Sometimes I jokingly tell them I own a hair salon called Hairy Kari where I cut hair with samurai swords. Other times I wink and tell them I've combined the two and own a salon called MisTRESSES where clients are tied to the chair. No wonder nobody ever takes anything I say seriously.

People seem to think my hair defines me (it doesn't) and are surprised to learn that despite my candy colored shell inside is a Jewey center.

I'm a word nerd that often makes up stuff for the Lenora Lexicon. Recent additions: Batmanage a trois (a threesome with Batman & The Joker) and Dogarhea.

Lately I've been really addicted to watching Toddlers & Tiaras even though I know it's totally wrong to tart up your kid and make them compete for titles that sound like they came from the Taco Bell $1 menu. Lil Miss Grand Supreme...really?

I recently tried explaining the magic of Hypercolor shirts to a youngin'. Best I could come up with was that it's like a mood ring for your armpits.

I've been in the National Enquirer (twice)

Anytime I'm at an establishment with "mixologists" I make sure to order a Zima, jello shot, or purple drank.

I'm the kind if vegetarian that loves leather. I don't eat my jackets.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You are awesome. You have integrity. You actually do what you say you're going to do. You have a lust for life or you're a street walking cheetah with a heart full of napalm. I know it's really hard to write a stranger and put yourself out there. If I saw someone I was attracted to I'd be tempted to just write "Come to Butthead" and hope for the best but if you are going to write me please be respectful. If I get any more creeps I'm just going to deactivate this thing again.

I've yet to write any guys back with 69, 420, or GQ in their screename. Please be funny. Or at least not find Dane Cook or mustache finger tattoos to be funny.

If you are in your 20's or 50's + it is highly unlikely I'm going to respond. Sorry, just not my thing.

If you write me several times and I don't respond so you google image search my photos and figure out my name and then let me know you did this in yet another message... Ugh...ya please don't do any of that.

Also, I am well aware my hair is red. No need to tell me or ask me about it. It's kind of the least interesting thing about me.