Hello. I am John. I live in a house with a big plastic shark called Mr Bitey. I don't talk to him though. That would be weird.
I enjoy things. Here are some: books, indie music, films, modern art, wine, whisky, playing guitar badly, writing badly, running (fairly well - I've not fallen over in at least 2 weeks), gym, Dogtanian, hedgehogs, snow, monkeys, science, cheese, silly stories, tea, clever people who can tell me things, sci-fi nerdism, narwhals, kinkery, coversations about silly things, conversations about serious things, sharks, Boosh, penguins, travel, Adam West, alliteration, Charlie Brooker, clouds, Flight of the Conchords...will that do?
With regard to less tangible gubbins, I'm a big old pro-PC, pro-feminist, pro LGBTQ, pro-socialism lefty and although I'm all about (do people still say 'all about'?) the empathy (cf David Foster Wallace's 'This Is Water' speech) if you've ever read the Daily Mail and nodded in approval then I probably won't like you too much. Sorry.
Sometimes I write stupid stories and post them here:
I'd like to meet someone who's clever and funny.