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30 Los Angeles, CA Woman


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I’m looking for

  • Men
  • Ages 27-40
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Oct 23
5' 6" (1.68m)
Doesn’t have kids
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm a smart creative. I like the weekends and I like wandering around. I like making breakfast and the use of apostrophes in text messages. I like trying new foods, taking new routes, and finding things off beaten trails. I make trails. I'm a runner. I like learning rules and knowing when to break them. I'm compassionate by nature and I have a dry sense of humor.

I frequently forget my wallet.
I expect my doors held.
I lie, cheat, and steal.
I carry ninja stars in my pocket for my common fits of jealous rage.
My dog matches my outfit.
My shopping addiction has ruined my credit.
I'll sleep in a hotel if I see a spider.
Beer tastes gross.
I'll drag you to anything starring Jennifer Aniston.
I consider myself a boring person.
I'll pinch my nose at your cigarette smoke and then ask for one later.
I'll complain 94% of my waking day.
I hate laughing.
I double park my car at every opportunity.
I talk on my phone while ordering coffee.
My dietary restrictions are written in 3 thousand page volumes (What to Eat, What Not to Eat, What to Criticize Others for Eating)
My love can be bought in 3 easy payments (plus shipping, handling, and my intrusive mother).
My personality can best be described as 'abrasive'.
Baseball is a waste of time.
Dudamel makes me yawn.
I can't see past my judgements of others.
I only make friends for my own advancement.
I have no soul.
I'm generally not interested in what you do.
I will not hold the elevator.
I'm mean to waiters.
California doesn't swing blue or red, everybody knows it's golden.
Motorcycles give me panic attacks.
I look nothing like my pictures suggest.
Most past relationships have restraining orders.
My nickname is 'Catfish'.
I eat with my mouth open.
I am entitled to (blank).
I take candy from babies.
The predominate color in my apartment is pink.
I'll exaggerate my yoga practice.
Who's Wagner?
I laugh at the expense of others.
I will most likely crash your car.
I'm a sloppy drunk and fastidious with my abuse of substances.
I don't have a conscience.
People describe my voice as 'shrill'.
I'm always late.
My boredom is depressing.
I've got zero personality.
I have no desires or ambitions.
I don't share chores.
Fresh air makes me nauseous.
Your friends will wish you'd never met me.

Sometimes my humor doesn't translate.

I only like pickles chopped up in tuna salad.
I only like gin with pickle juice.
I have no desire to add gin to my tuna.

I hate the word 'random'. There. I said it.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Managing endeavors. Finding parking spots. Negotiating solutions. Making lists.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Making people feel (un)comfortable.

Carrying a conversation.

Painting my nails (really fast).

Listening to stories/Telling stories.

Puzzles (the jigsaw type and others, too).

Making something out of nothing.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My dimple. (Singular)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Water. Headphones. Espresso. Spotify. Punctuation. Jameson.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Where is the nearest exit?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Out. Or in. Sometimes around.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm fascinated by hoarders.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
1. If you want more than a pen pal.

2. If you've got your shit together. (Mostly).

3. If you get that 90% of this profile is bullshit.

4. If you're an astronaut lawyer cowboy. Period.

*note that these are not ALL requirements.