You know that button in the elevator with the little fireman hat on it? Turns out that is NOT the button you push to order a fireman hat. Some things you learn the hard way.

I moved to Philly recently for a new job. I've had some good times, good laughs, and met some great people. What a fine city this is. Although, a few things I could do without are the backwards PA beer laws, the Roosevelt Blvd, and New Jersey. I live in South Philly and I love it.

I was born and raised in West Virginia (seventh generation and proud of it), and have lived there most of my life, save for about 6 years in Boston. And yes, my rural WV upbringing was exactly like MTV's Buckwild.

I wear a suit to work (sometimes), but prefer the comfort of a flannel and jeans. I wish I could wear my Chacos year-round.

I strive to be open-minded and nonjudgmental (live and let live), and always try to see things from the perspective of others instead of just my own.

Life is all about the company we keep, and we should all strive to be good to the ones we love. Friends, family, lovers, etc. You've got to give it to get it.

I try to keep things simple. I don't own a lot of 'things' and I'm constantly trying to get rid of what I have. Living in Philly for almost a year has made me realize I don't really need a car. So I'm getting rid of that, too. Wanna buy a car?

I prefer sitting at a bar chatting over a stiff drink to chatting over coffee.

If you play an instrument and would like to play some tunes, that is a definite plus.

In a moment of extreme lameness I installed the iPhone app for this site, and it pretty much says I am constantly online. So while it may appear ultra lame that I am always online, I am in fact not always online - thus the lameness level should decrease dramatically. But the fact that I installed an okcupid iPhone app in the first place raises it back up. So now I am at a healthy, balanced level of lameness. I could show you some charts and graphs if any of this needs further clarification.....

Shaping young minds (apologies to the young minds), and preparing future educational leaders (apologies to the educational system, also).

I am an academic by trade, and I have the grey in my beard to prove it. The next step will undoubtedly be the corduroy blazer with the leather elbow patches, but not just yet. (Update: blazer procured. Its more awesome than I ever imagined.)

Recently, a university made some grievous error and offered me a faculty position. Just biding my time until they realize what they've done. But until then, I am a professor and administrator at a local university, directing a doctoral program in education. Before that, I was earning some more expensive wallpaper at grad school in beautiful West Virginia. Before that, I was a music professor in Boston. Before that, I tried break into male modeling. But that dream died when I realized I'm not that good-looking. Some things you learn the hard way.

Sometimes my job drives me bananas. But lame jokes aside, its a good gig and positive work.

Procrastinating (certified, card-carrying professional).
The banjo (except the exact opposite).
Growing a beard.
Telling really bad jokes.
Playing guitar.
Self deprecation
Writing awesome songs and later realizing I've completely ripped off a riff or melody from another song.
Making your pets like me.
Listening to music at punishing volumes.
Dousing everything I eat with Sriracha.
Drinking so much coffee that I can see into the future.
Traveling light.
Climbing stairs two at a time.
Failing at sleeping in
Being on time (except for catching the last train of the night. I miss it every time).
Being polite and courteous - I say please and thank you to everyone (if you are rude to wait-staff, this isn't gonna work!)

I wear my heart on my sleeve. Really, its a serious medical condition. Doctors say they've never seen a thing like it.

I am what I am, and what I am is a yam.

Life in academia means unfortunately I am not able to read for pleasure as much as I would like, but authors I have repeatedly enjoyed over the years include Jack Keroauc, Phillip K. Dick, and Cormac McCarthy. Currently reading a biography of Meriwether Lewis.

I will watch just about any film, and I appreciate good cinema as well as nonsensical.

TV: I dig it. BSG, Wire, Party Down, and all the other shows that everybody watches. Seinfeld will never get old. Treme is pretty much the best thing ever.

I REALLY love music, and do not limit my tastes in terms of genre. If its good, its good.
All the time music: The Phish, The Ween, The Dead, Talking Heads, Rolling Stones, Beatles, Del McCoury, Yonder, George Harrison, Lou Reed, Sonic Youth, Fugazi, Miles Davis, Chet Baker, Dave Brubeck, Steve Earle, Anders Osborne, The Pogues, lots of bluegrass and roots music.

Lately listening to a lot of Dawes, Black Lillies, Alabama Shakes, Gary Clark Jr., and Infamous Stringdusters. Neil Young's Zuma and Jimi's Band of Gypsys have also been creeping in there. A whole bunch of jazz records too lately. I really wish I still had my turntable.

I especially love live music and am always down for a show. Recent shows I've seen are Anders Osborne, Galactic, Alabama Shakes, several Phish shows, and the Punch Bros. Delfest was awesome. Excited for Antibalas in December.

I am pretty much a huge obsessive nerd when it comes to music. I once crossed the Atlantic to see a band.

But mostly I just listen to sea shanties.

Travel
Live Music
Good beer, whiskey, and bourbon
Laughing with good friends and family
Burritos
The occasional good cigar

.....travelling to new and strange locales.

.....my two dogs who now live the good life on my folks' farm.

.....which direction people who don't own televisions point their furniture.

.....if there is anything more Caucasian than the fake-thunder sound that accompanies the produce misting machine at Whole Foods.

.....how people with office jobs procrastinated and wasted time before the internet.

.....is it time for dogs to have a social network of their own?

.....how can I possibly be in my 30s?

.....how much longer until retirement? 33 is close to retirement age, right????

.....whiskey.

At home playing music, at a show, sitting at a bar chatting over whiskey, or having strange adventures on the streets of Philadelphia. Lately I've been out of town almost every weekend for some reason or another.

My social security number is 2318344513 and my ATM pin is 7083.

I secretly almost kind of non-ironically enjoy the Fast & the Furious movies.

I have never seen one episode of Law & Order or any of its subsequent spinoffs.

I just discovered Ikea (never lived near one until now) and every time I go there, suddenly four hours have vanished and I'm in financial ruin.

I espouse that material possessions are not important to me, yet I own an obscene amount of Apple products and a giant tv.

I'm a huge Pittsburgh Penguins fan (I include this here as these could be fightin' words in Philly).

I was once shot down by Amy Poehler. True story.

John Corbett and I share the same hometown. I don't like that.

You are the person who keeps stealing the bulb from my porch light (don't worry, I actually think it's kind of hilarious).

You find my poor attempts at humor at least mildly amusing.

You are a huge nerd and not afraid to admit it.

You can take a joke.

You play an instrument or would like to learn one.

You won't ask me what part of Virginia I am from, and are aware of the fact that West Virginia is an actual separate state. Its true, I swear!

You think George was the best Beatle.

You prefer walking or public transportation over driving.

You like to drink good whiskey and beer and check out good bands.