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33 M Rochester, NY

My Details

Last Online
Today – 7:01am
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
A little extra
Christianity, but not too serious about it
Virgo, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Science / Engineering
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly)

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My self-summary
"And I need you to give it meaning,
I need you to share the view" - Hum

I kind of live for the next highlight (the next fun event, whether it's a concert, trip, whatever). It's how I motivate myself to dredge through long days of work without (much) complaining. ;)
My last vacation was amazing. It was a Mayian ruins tour around the Yucatán Peninsula (Mexico, Guatemala, and Belize) at the end of 2011. I returned home to discover my closest friend (I've known him for 25 years and he was my roommate) had been hiding a crack addiction from me for the past few months and some guests he had over in my absence had robbed us. On top of cleaning up that mess, I also discovered that it had been 3 months since he had paid rent. He has since cleaned himself up using religion as his anti-drug, but his negligence cost him my trust and put us on the local PD radar. So I moved out of that small town (a couple hours South East of here) and came back to Rochester. I love live music. Living in Rochester again meant that I can see concerts in town, get to Buffalo in like an hour, or Syracuse in like an hour and a half to give me more convenient access to upstate New York shows (compared to the 2-3 hours I was driving a few times a month from the previous town to see concerts). I've been going to shows I wanted to see, pretty much as often as I could, for the past 15 years or so. I just get lost in the music and feed off of the energy from the crowd. I have trouble telling myself no and there are so many shows I would like to see. For instance, it's July and i've got a running list of announced shows that I would like to see which extends into December...
I thought that I would reunite with people I used to know from the last time I lived in Rochester (around 2007), but I seem to be on my own these days. About 1-2 weekends a month, I see some old friends from my previous town (I drive down there because most of them have lost their licenses to dwi's), but the rest of the time it's just me anymore. I've got a lot of extended family in the area, but they are very religious and I like to party, so I go my way and they go theirs (though we're friendly and see each other on holidays). I'm lucky enough to have a job that I can perform from anywhere with a strong internet connection, but i've got a lease in Rochester for the time being. I'd like to move to a bigger city some day (some place big enough to get all the bands to come around with reliable public transit so I don't have to worry about driving home), it'd be so nice to be able to drink at concerts without counting your drinks so you know you'll get home without incident. Right now I can't afford a place like NYC because i've got too much debt from feeding my passions like a glutton. I'm nearly always alone at shows and what not, so I guess i'm a bit defensive (I mostly keep to myself and do what I want, no one else is going to make sure I make it home "You gotta be your own best friend"). The friends I do have left are close friends, I may not see them often, but i'd trust them with my life. I'm going back to the Netherlands again in Thanksgiving 2014 (booked it a week ago :) ) with a friend. I kind of had my eyes on Greece / Turkey (where I haven't been before), but this was my first chance to travel with a friend (all my previous trips have been alone or with groups of strangers that mostly, eventually became acquaintances). Besides judging the Cup is a hell of a lot of fun anyways, so he didn't exactly have to twist my arm to get me to go with him instead of my originally intended destination. I aggressively pay down my debts, but frequently lose progress because I don't want to say no to the next fun thing. I guess i'm not so spontaneous because I always have plans down the road of what i'd like to do. I mostly don't notice people, i'm not anti-social, but i'm terrible with time so i'm always in a rush. I haven't met a single new person (who's name I can recall) since I moved back here in 2012.

The point of dating is to determine if that person is someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, right?

Sorry, I cannot date someone with kids already.
What I’m doing with my life
I recently resumed going to the gym a few times a week. I had tentative plans to see Greece and Turkey in 2012, but my car died on the way back from Bonnaroo instead (my vacation fund turned into a down payment instead). I'm horrible at being places on-time, but do what I say i'm going to do. I could care less what people think in most cases, but I find myself moved by songs. I believe in a strong work ethic.
um i've seen way too many movies..
I find myself watching alot of documentaries these days
one day I sat down and wrote out a long list of things I'd heard of, but didn't know much about or didn't know the context of the event and i've spent a good handful of nights reading online about those topics lately
I play guitar a bit (though fairly poorly) and i've been learning drums and bass a bit (mostly when screwing around with friends while drinking), I enjoy traveling and i've taken brief trips around the US, Central America, Europe, and Egypt
My non-productive nights tend to involve video games.

I'm usually stuck going to shows alone because I don't know anyone that listens to half of the stuff that i'm into - In 2012, I saw: The "Yardbirds", Voodoo Glow Skulls, Henry Rollins (Spoken Word), Jonny Corndawg, Disappears / Lotus Plaza, Clutch / Hellyeah, Kottonmouth Kings / Twiztid, Reverend Horton Heat, Cold War Kids / Kaskade, St. Vincent, Primus, Whose Line Anyway, Flogging Molly, Bonnaroo (Radiohead, Chili Peppers, Ben Folds Five, White Denim, SOJA, Rubblebucket, Bad Brains, Electric Guest, Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings, Avett Brothers, Foster the People, Puscifer, Danzig/Misfits, Dispatch, Alice Cooper, Skrillex, Gary Clark Jr., Grouplove, the Beach Boys, fun., Phish, etc), Big D & the Kid's Table / Goldfinger / Reel Big Fish, Mayer Hawthorn, Bonzai (Eve 6, Gaslight Anthem, Offspring, Our Lady Peace, etc), K-Rockathon (Public Enemy, Korn, Pod, Red Light Kings, Eve 6, Gaslight Anthem, Offspring, etc), Summerland (Marcy Playground, Gin Blossoms, Everclear, Lit, and Sugar Ray), Wilco, Toadies/Helmet, Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Agent Orange/Queers, Hed (pe), Dropkick Murphy's, Sleighbells, Ben Fold's Five, Marilyn Manson/Rob Zombie, Mike Watt, Primus, G Love & Special Sauce, Sleighbells, Cypress Hill, Mrs. Skanetto, State Radio, Reverend Horton Heat, and Ra Ra Riot.

2014 shows so far: KMFDM, Manchester Orchestra / Man Man, Dr Dog, Richie Ramone, Jimkata, I am the Avalanche, Reel Big fish, Less Than Jake, Hold Steady and Deer Tick (Ithaca, Rochester, AND Buffalo :) ), Whigs, Local H, Deerhoof, the Aqua Bats, Manchester Orchestra, Death Cab For Cutie, Ringo Starr, Bonnaroo 2014 [Flaming Lips, White Denim, Cake, The Avett Brothers, Dr Dog, Wiz Khalifa, Vampire Weekend, Cage the Elephant, The Bouncing Souls, Slightly Stoopid, Arctic Monkeys, Skrillex, Fitz and The Tantrums, Mastodon, Neutral Milk Hotel, Nick Cave, Grouplove, Andrew Bird, Head and Heart, Meshuggah, Green Sky Blue Grass, Okkerville River, Thao and the Get Down Stay Down, Jack White, Elton John, etc], Guttermouth, Jello Biafra, Weezer, Primus / Ween, Sublime, Queens of the Stone Age, Megadeth, Ben Fold's, Gogol Bordello, (maybe) Vandals/Offspring/PennyWise/Bad Religion, (maybe) Coupe De' Villes, Presidents of the United States of America, (maybe) the Krockathon, (maybe) Edgefest, (maybe) Bonzai, (maybe) Powerman 5000/Hed PE, (maybe) Bob Weir & Ratdog, (maybe) Fitz & the Tantrums, (maybe) Scott Weiland & The Wildabouts, (maybe) Afghan Whigs, (maybe) Greensky Bluegrass, (maybe) Foster the People, (maybe) Rubblebucket, Tom Petty or Lorde?,(maybe) Black Keys, (maybe) Biz Markie, Pinback, Mad Caddies, and (maybe) Hot Tuna / Donna the Buffalo.

I work at a software company. My dream job is probably video game development, but these days I pay the bills writing regression tests.

I like to take in a variety of foods like Indian, Chinese, Italian, Mexican, Thai, etc. I've been meaning to try Sri Lankan, Pakistani, and Korean eventually.
I’m really good at
This totally does not go with the topic of this section, but I don't care.
Henry Rollins:
"I want a woman who can sit me down, shut me up, tell me 10 things I don't already know, and make me laugh. I don't care what you look like, just turn me on. If you can do that, I will follow you on bloody stumps through the snow. I will nibble your mukluks with my own teeth. I will do your windows. I will care about your feelings. Just have something in there."
The first things people usually notice about me
"I don't know what to say...
I could say I want you,
That would be a bore
Maybe in a font you
Haven't seen before?
I could say I'll haunt you
Till your dying day
I could tease and taunt you,
But what would I say?
See, I don't know what to say...
I could say I crave you
Still, you little brat
I could rant and rave, you
Know I can do that
I could say I gave you
Everything I have
I could say I'll save you
You might think me mad
So I don't know what to say...
I could try and lead you
Down the garden path
I could say I'll feed you
You can do the math
I could say I need you
Offer you a ring
I'll be guaranteed you
Don't believe a thing...
I could try and shove you
Off the nearest cliff
I could say I lo..." - The Magnetic Fields

"Do you ever walk alone?
Like a drifter in the dark
Seeking out what isn't there
Looking only for a spark

From a girl who's all alone
Maybe she's a-driftin' too
Like a shadow in the night
Waitin' just to meet with you

And then perhaps in love you'll stay
Or fall and go your separate ways
Still searchin' for a spark
Like a drifter in the dark" - Ween

"Not everyone who is lost is
Wondering why
Sometimes a lonely way
Taking your name down from the Jumbotron
Find a new place to stay
And a new home for the trumpeter swan" - They Might Be Giants

"I'm so happy, when you're here
And I'm not a happy girl
So like a miracle occurs
I'm happy when you're near
And all my angels appear
And the demons leave my ear
And I want to clean the kitchen
We're two peas from the same pod
Bowing down to the same God
We're not sure exists

We both walk with heavy souls
With bullet holes
And a backpack full of bad affairs and fears
I'm happy when you're here, kinda
I'm so happy when you're here
We both laugh at the same cruel jokes
We both still drink and smoke
Well I'm happy when you're here, kinda" - Jill Sobule

"I can bleed as well as anyone,
But I need someone to help me sleep" - Counting Crows

"I'm in love with rock and roll, but that will change eventually" - Local h
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
(a) the elegant universe by brian greene, ethan frome by wharton, cyrano de bergerac by rostand, forbidden knowledge by roger shattuck, ender's game by orson scott card, various dream intrepretation books, always liked Dean Koontz books, usually buy one for the plane when traveling, etc
(b) falling down, half baked, bringing out the dead, punch drunk love, 10 things i hate about you, fear and loathing in los vegas, donnie darko, mothman prophicies, 7 television commercials, breakfast at tiffany's, brainscan, starship troopers, evil dead trilogy, high fidelity, vanilla sky, fight club, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, etc
(c) Radiohead, Eels, Tori Amos, The Magnetic Fields, The Only Children, Blake Babies, Juliana Hatfield, Some Girls, Corporate Avenger Tool, bad religion, Big D and the Kid's Table, Grizzley Bear, muse, Sublime, Smut Peddlers, Odetta, Count Basie, Little Walter, John Lee Hooker, Mother Superior, Otis Rush, The Format, Travis, Black Kids, Cold War Kids, Suicide Machines, Cardigans, Butthole Surfers, Toadies, Dr Dog, Local H, Folk Implosion, New Pornographers, Blonde Red Head, Rollins Band, smashing pumpkins, G Love & Special Sauce, Pain, Gogol Bordello, GutterMouth, Her Space Holiday, the Hold Steady, Hum, Jill Sobule, Magic Numbers, Ani Difranco, Oysterhead, Devotchka, God Lives Underwater, Joan Osborn, Mad Caddies, Massive Attack, Mazzy Star, Neutral Milk Hotel, Okkervil River, Pete Droge, Pietasters, Postelles, Rentals, Reverend Horton Heat, Saul Williams, Scott Weiland, Chris Cornell, They Might Be Giants, The Unicorns, Whigs, Ween, Zombina and the Skeletones, flogging molly, drop kick murphy's, andrew bird, bobby darin, everly brothers, counting crows, pantera, I am the avalanche, cat stevens, les claypool, primus, CIV, clash, rugburns, morphine, BML (Rochester band), cake, ben fold's 5, black sabbath, bob and ziggy marley, blind melon, four non blondes, nirvana, meat puppets, mother love bone, temple of the dog, pearl jam, sound garden, big bad voodoo daddy, apples in stereo, the aquabats, veruca salt, al green, alanis morissette (1st cd only), aerosmith, 6th's, future bible hero's, dead kennedy's, sleeper, everything but the girl, everclear, everlast, flamming lips, fiona apple, filter, deam martin, frank sinatra (love the sad songs, not so big on the happy ones), fuel, frank zappa, gg allin, goldfinger, ICP, janis joplin, jewel (1st cd only), johnny cash, johnny tillotson, Zager & Evans, korn (early stuff only), staind (1st cd only), K's choice, lea anderone, less thank jake, therapy, scars on broadway, nada surf, weezer (the albums before their music changed when Rivers went to Harvard), kotton mouth kings, our lady peace, letters to cleo, beck, refreshments, White Denim, Asian Teacher Factory, etc
(d) chinese, italian, indian, thai, mexican, sea food, steak, been meaning to try korean one of these days..
I spend a lot of time thinking about
physics, religion, music, movies, work related topics, psychology, linguistics, how old is the Earth? do multinational leagues have the right to maintain existing borders? is human life sacred? are the bible/torah and qur'an based on the epic of gilgamesh? by what basis do some groups consider electricity spiritual enslavement? should a social reform be carried out even if it is expected to do more harm to the majority than the previous condition did to the minority (and what should happen if this was discovered only after the reform had been imlemented)? can the grand unified theory be experimentally proven? why do most organized religions consider women as second class citizens? did the indigenous peoples have the right idea forbidding property ownership? should the popular vote be used for elections instead of electoral colleges? how old are the stories from the illiad and oddesy really? do those with more have a responsibility to give to those with less and stop human rights violations? why are humans the only species that are not prevented from breeding after genetic deformities are evident? has the arc of noah been found? should voluntary euthanasia be legalized? have we reached the point where survival of the fitest is no longer keeping morons in check? what's the most important aspect of a song to you? are we really any more advanced than our ancestors from antiquity or do we just have more things that a few smart people made for us? of the things you use on a daily basis, how much do you understand about HOW they work? if I sent you out into the woods with a hatchet, how long until you could make something to send me an e-mail? (Thanks Joe Rogan) besides blasphemy, where did curses originate? if there is a being with omniscience, would it be total or inherent? does omniscience preclude freedom of choice? how similar is the bacteria inside of our bodies and the people on the earth? is simultaneous reality just a figment of the imagination? where are the missing natural predators.. why don't they release hungry tigers and knife wielding chimps at nascar events? would a society that shed no tears be inconceivably mediocre? (Thanks Yonlu)
On a typical Friday night I am
playing games, hanging out at a friend's, or at a concert, hockey game, or comedy club
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
i've never had much interest in getting a cell phone
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–36
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
um you've actually read this whole thing and still want to?
I've got a reasonably good Software development position, but I did a whole bunch of traveling on credit cards in my 20's figuring I was going to do what I wanted to do and I'd figure out how to pay for it later, and well I guess it's later. I work a lot. I don't get to see friends all that often anymore. I can hold a conversation. I've got tons of useless facts rolling around and I can describe experiences from visiting Tikal, the Great Pyramids, the Cannabis Cup, etc but I think a better discussion would be to start planning our next adventure.