My second middle name is Random and I make comics. Comics don't pay the bills, managing a shitty movie theater does. I used to be a projectionist, it was a better job. Easier to smoke up during.

Before I was born my father would play the Beatles to me in the womb through headphones placed on my mother's stomach. He raised me to believe John Lennon was God. Now he seems shocked that I'm a super-liberal. We can't really be in the same room together without arguing about politics.

I went to the Ontario College of Art and Design in Toronto before deciding I loved the city, hated being in school.

I'm not from Canada, I'm from Philly.

It turns out I've been an Absurdist for the past 15 years. Here I thought I was just a Discordian.

I only look Scottish or Irish, I'm not.

The average American male body type is "FATASS" right?

Cars make me happy, happy enough that I own a '67 Mercury Cougar and a '69 Plymouth Valiant. For some reason, I moved to Brooklyn and left the cars in PA. Late '60s cars with V8 engines do not mix well with Brooklyn parking or NYC gas/insurance prices. I might rattle on about cars beyond any extent you can stand, but I do this with many subjects... Movies, music, politics, zombies, sex, etc.

I named my first car, a '95 Plymouth Neon, after Buckminster Fuller.

I put more stock in the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator than most other lame tests trying to classify people's personalities, and I am without a doubt INTP. Please plan accordingly.

I don't sleep.

I look forward to the zombie apocalypse.

You got to live, yeah, your life as though your number one. Yeah, you've got to live, yeah, your life and make a point of having some fun.

Drawing, driving, rocking out, brewing tea, getting through the crowd to the front of the stage, having the right tool for the job, killing zombies.

Probably me being a snob about something they like. Or that I'm a horrible nerd.

Black-framed glasses and perpetual scruff, if not a full beard. My razor and I are not very close.

(A) Vonnegut, Hunter S. Thompson, R.A. Wilson, Douglas Adams, Rudy Rucker, Thomas Pynchon, Joseph Heller, Hubert Selby Jr., Tolkien, Bruce Sterling, Capote, Joyce, Hammett, Greg Egan, Grant Naylor, Ted McKeever, Alan Moore, Warren Ellis, Mark Millar, Brian Wood, Transmetropoliton, Planetary, Hellboy, Blade of the Immortal, Neal Stephenson, Our Band Could Be Your Life, The Dark Tower series

(B) Evil Dead 2, El Topo, Dead Man, American Astronaut, Children of Men, Dancer in the Dark, Tetsuo: The Iron Man, City of Lost Children, Brazil, Battle Royal, Re-Animator, Mad Max, Wild Zero, Dellamorte Dellamore, Second Time Virgin, Human Highway, The Squid And The Whale, Me And You And Everyone We Know, the Coen Brothers, Sam Raimi, Bruce Campbell, Marc Caro and Jean-Pierre Jeunet, David Cronenberg, Takashi Miike, bad horror, cheesy 80s movies, anything with zombies, and a lot more.

(hidden category B2: TV!) Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Flight of the Conchords, 30 Rock, The Office, How I Met Your Mother, The IT Crowd, Peep Show, The Inbetweeners, Arrested Development, Futurama, Venture Bros., Firefly, The Young Ones, Blackadder, Black Books, Freaks and Geeks, Undeclared, The Kids In The Hall, Red Dwarf, Monty Python, Fraggle Rock, The Adventures of Pete and Pete, The Sifl & Olly Show, The Muppet Show

(C) favourite band of the week: The Mae Shi, favourite band of all time: DEVO, other faves: punk rock, indie rock, noise pop, noise rock, grind pop, weird noises, Bishop Allen, Add N To X, Mouse on Mars, Tom Waits, Neil Young, Stephen Merritt, The Magnetic Fields, Battles, of Montreal, Gogol Bordello, Andrew Bird, The Go! Team, Justice, Nick Drake, Busdriver, GoodBooks, Modern Lovers, Servotron, Sonic Youth, the Pixies, Captain Beefheart, Frank Zappa, Self, Enon, Stereo Total, Björk, Call Florence Pow, Apes And Androids, Oingo Boingo, XTC, Big Black, Pretty Girls Make Graves, Young Marble Giants, John Vanderslice, Melt-Banana, Six Finger Satellite, Pharoahe Monch, Chuck Berry, and way more.

(D) Vegatarian dishes! Thai especially. And Indian. And Chinese and Japanese. Anything but fast food and meat. Mangos might be the greatest thing ever. Avocado is up there too.

Absurdity is the only thing I can't do without. Good thing this world is chock full of it. Keep it weird, humanity.

Fat bottom girls, you make the rockin' world go 'round.

Looks like I'm going to be working Friday nights for awhile. And Saturdays. Fun times. Catch me on the weeknights?

I possibly have Asperger's syndrome, which means I'm totally awkward in all situations. This also means I sometimes come off as an asshole. I'm geared towards figuring out computers, cars, and complex analytical problems rather than people, but that doesn't stop me from trying.

You deeply identify with The Modern Lovers' "Roadrunner", you think Joy Division's "Love Will Tear Us Apart" is the greatest recording of all time, you only need the first four of Devo's albums to keep you company if you ever get marooned on a deserted island.

You don't actually have to know anything about music, as long as you have a brain. Brains are sexy.

Being a nerd and/or a stoner is good, but unnecessary.