I have decided to update my profile, not because my previous profile was inaccurate, but because I think I can better capture who I am and what I'm looking for with a bit more care and precision.
I have many of the characteristics of an alpha male: I am confident, funny, secure, grounded, and generous. I have been in leadership positions all my life. I am an accomplished musician and performer. I have worked in warzones and risked my life to save others. I have been jailed for defending my rights and I have received awards for my commitment and dedication to worthy causes.
However, those are not the characteristics that define who I am. I am also very spiritual, warm-hearted, kind and gentle. I am sensitive, passionate and romantic. Above all, I am very loving. I care deeply about the world and the people (and animals AND plants) in it.
My heart pours out for people in need, wherever they are -- whether they 'deserve' their situation or not! I want the best for the people in my life and I want to help them to be the best they can be. My two daughters mean the whole world to me and I love them to bits. And my heart aches from the sheer weight of all the love I'm holding onto right now for that one special person in my life - and for all the people SHE loves.
There are lots of things that can get in the way of a healthy and sustainable relationship. And the older we get, the more difficult it becomes to adjust and adapt to another person's long-established habits and behaviours. However, for me, the most important factor by far is the quality of the love in that relationship. When that love becomes diminished and limited by jealousies and competitiveness, possessiveness or just plain self-centredness, it can no longer sustain a loving relationship. People may insist that the 'love' is still there, but in my experience it is a very 'small' kind of love and it doesn't work for me.
We all want love, that's not the issue. The issue for me is, how BIG is your love, how expansive is it, how 'unconditional'? Is it bigger than the differences that invariably exist between us, the conflicts that inevitably erupt, the stupid mistakes we all make? Can it encompass and contain all the annoyances, aggravations and silly things that undermine and wear down the love if it's not strong enough to withstand them?
Most importantly of all, is your love big enough and non-possessive enough to engulf not just your romantic partner, but also his children, his children's friends, his extended family, his extended friends and colleagues, his students, his supporters, his detractors, his critics, even his ex-wife?
I am looking for someone with a whole lot of love, not just because that's what I myself want or need, but because that is also where my life is taking me now. As it states above, I am a man with a mission! I plan to spend the second half of my life pouring out as much love as I can on the world and transforming lives with that love. I don't know exactly what that will look like yet, but it's going to involve a lot of speaking and writing and singing and dancing and loving!
I'm looking for someone who wants to be a part of something like that. Someone who also has so much love to give that you know there's more to it than just giving it all to one person. I don't know the exact shape of what will come because that is something that will have to be co-created together, as we each bring our unique qualities and skills to this endeavour. But whatever it is, with two very big hearts on the case, it's going to be good - REAL good!