Find better matches with our advanced matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


35 M Chicago, IL

My Details

Last Online
Today – 3:05am
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Full figured
Not at all
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Cancer, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Art / Music / Writing
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Likes cats
English (Fluently), Chinese (Poorly), Spanish (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
I'm just a 34 year old dude, making his way through the world. I'm as cool as the next guy. No... wait. Not that guy. That guy sucks. Look 3 guys to the left. Yeah, the one in the Sonic Youth T-shirt. I'm as cool as he is. His name is Greg. I talked to him a bunch. You should prolly date him.

I think I just cockblocked myself in text.

I am an ESTP on the Briggs-Myers scale.
I am a TOFS (too old for this shit) on the Riggs-Murtaugh scale.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm a branding manager. What is a branding manager, you ask? It's when a PR person, a graphic artist and a social media director love each other very much, and 9 months later, they give birth to a beautiful nearing-middle-aged nerd who will do the job of all 3 for less overhead cost.
I’m really good at
Cooking, graphic design, writing funny things, acting out said funny things, making music, trivia, being vague and dismissive, and other stuff or whatever.
The first things people usually notice about me
That I am humble and modest. Those are the two things that make me better than those who surround me.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Naked Pictures of Famous People by Jon Stewart, Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman, More Information Than You Require/That Is All - John Hodgman, The Tao Te Ching - Lao Tzu, Generation Ecstacy - Simon Reynolds, Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs - Chuck Klosterman.

Movies: Black Dynamite, Pi, Basquiat, Garden State, Robocop (a much better movie than you'd think), Xingfu Shiguang (happy times), Yojimbo, Auntie Mame, This is Spinal Tap, The Missing Gun, Let The Right One In, Shaft... I love found footage collections and K Dramas, because Everything Is Terrible and My Girlfriend is a 9-Tailed Fox, that's why.

Music: Old school EDM (early Prodigy, Underworld, LA Style, Krome and Time, The Orb, Madchester scene (Happy Mondays, James, Stone Roses) shoegazing music, Ska, (early Bob Marley, Toots and the Maytals, Skatalites Hotknives, Madness), Very old blues, (Leadbelly, Bessie Smith), old jazz, (Dave Brubeck, Miles Davis) hip hop, Indie, (Pavement, Yo La Tengo, Flaming Lips, Sonic Youth)... ummm... just about anything other than modern rap and recent country, really. Also Klezmer music does nothing for me.

Food: Sure. Love it. Ethiopian food is turrible, tho. And catfish tastes like dirt.

I almost bought a bag of pistachios, when I noticed the side of the bag said, in very cheery lettering, "These pistachios are chock-full of copper and manganese and contain over 64mg of phytosterols per serving!" and I was like, "Whew! Thanks, pistachio bag! I almost put that shit in my MOUTH."
The six things I could never do without
My Bike. Yup. I ride fixie. Wanna fight about it?
The shame of those I've outwitted
I spend a lot of time thinking about
how Light Cycles are a lot awesomer in TRON than they are at the laundromat.

How so many Presbyterian churches claim to be the first. Seems needlessly competitive.

Why my English friend is going to university to become a barrister. I don't think it should take a degree to pour a cappuccino.
On a typical Friday night I am
Riding my bike or maybe watching some fantastically bad footage of someone massaging their cat for fun and profit.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I find the marionette wife in those DirecTV ads disturbingly attractive.

I'm getting a little skeptical that the next one WILL be the final fantasy.

finally, you can also let your mom know that you didn't eat the last cookie that one time when you were 6. That was me, and I am sorry.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 22–46
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
I have made you laugh or think that I might be cool to hang out with.

My pictures have driven you mad with lust.

My profile has not driven you mad.

My profile has not actually made you mad.