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23 M Ottawa, Ontario, CA

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 7:12pm
6′ 1″ (1.85m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
When drinking
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Aries, but it doesn’t matter
Working on masters program
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), French (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly), Arabic (Poorly), Russian (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
As a Moroccan-Quebecois, I am technically more African-American than most African-Americans.

I write math for a living, and I play drums casually. If you want a guy who can talk dirty to you using extremal combinatorics while finger-tapping a drum solo all over your body, look no further.

I have a hard time taking any sentence seriously if it ends with "can u not."

I had 3800+ questions answered before, but I decisively cleared them all out a while ago. Now, my OkCupid personality tab says that I have maximum spontaneity. Working as intended.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Taxpayer money is being rerouted directly into my bank account so that I get to play unbelievably complex games of connect-the-dots with other adults, all day long—believe me, that is more accurate than you think. I also spend a lot of time sitting in a lab, watching videos of people playing video games, sometimes even watching videos of people watching people play video games.

In other words, I'm doing a masters in computer science at Carleton, researching stuff in graph theory. As for later: I'm undecided between pursuing what is guaranteed to be a great career as a prolific researcher on the bleeding edge of computing science and mathematics, or becoming a part-time Ottawa-based comedian. That was a joke. *cough*

Otherwise, I recently bought a 1 kg kielbasa for 2.49$. I mean, whoa, what a steal. That was a pretty exciting time.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
If you're white, you'll think I'm brown; if you're brown, you'll think I'm white. There is only one answer though, and it took me 23 years to figure it out:

Launch your favourite photo editor, select the "TOOTH WHITENING" brush, and try to smudge it across my face. I'll spare you the effort: it does jack shit.

I'm white as the devil, y'all.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Currently eating up books written by sad hermit-like misanthropic French old fucks, e.g. Céline and Houellebecq. I have a huge reading list and I somehow expect to get through it by turning at most 2 pages each night before passing out in my chair. What can I say—I'm an optimist.
Otherwise: The Pigeon, Notes from Underground, The Possibility of an Island, The Kreutzer Sonata, American Psycho, Neuromancer, Cat's Cradle, The Sirens of Titan, Whatever (I mean, that's what it's called), etc.

Game of Thrones, Firefly, Breaking Bad, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, House of Cards, Six Feet Under, The Wire, South Park, True Detective.

The Fountain, American Beauty, Donnie Darko, Taxi Driver, Fight Club, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Lost in Translation, Oldboy, Garden State, etc.
Okay, you get it, I mostly like movies about crazy people.

Mostly into ambient arctic-grind electrodeathcore psychodrone. I mean: ambient electronic, downtempo, trip hop, and jazz recently, but I really love post and math rock. For instance:
Ava Luna, Boards of Canada, Shigeto, Tipper, Lilacs & Champagne, Bonobo, Explosions in the Sky, toe, Grails, Mouse on the Keys, etc.

I am inexplicably healthy despite consuming at least 600% of the daily recommended intake of cholesterol, every day.
In terms of actual food choices: beans, tabasco, sriracha, unsalted butter, salted butter, just generally butter whatever I don't care how much fucking salt there is, etc.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
● Walking.
● Meaty bass riffs.
● Cranberry juice.
● Lentils.
● Mathemagics.
● Really strong coffee and really strong beer. Really strong coffee-flavoured beer.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Brains, math, shit that people do, things that don't make sense, chickpeas, roundabout ways of accomplishing things, and other essential questions such as:

● Why is it socially acceptable to be an outspoken fan of Fifty Shades, while people seem disgusted when I tell them about my passion for Japanese gameshow tentacle porn?
● How long could I survive on a diet consisting only of espresso, beer, and Sour Cream and Onion™ potato chips?
● Are people from Vermont really that weird?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Remembering that banks are closed on weekends, and getting angry about it. Getting angry about forgetting that banks are closed on weekends. Trying to remember that I always forget about it, and remembering that I always try.

Otherwise: relaxing, picking fruit flies out of my scotch, hanging out with friends, reading poorly typeset academic papers, or playing a video game.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I used to do magic. Like, sleight of hand sort of stuff. I stopped when I realized how much of a dweeb I'd become, but not before collecting over 50$ in vanished coins.

... that's a lie. I stopped when I got caught. The coin vanishing trick was done using a magnet concealed in my palm, attached to an elastic near my shoulders, that would retract through underneath my shirt. Once, I did the trick in front of an audience of kids in high school, and the magnet apparatus got caught in my shirt fabric. As the elastic pulled it back, it also lifted my shirt and bunched it up around my neck, exposing my innocent nipples... and so the wondrous mystery of my magic was lost to my peers. Seems like I couldn't inspire them anymore once I'd surprised them with my bare puffy teats.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–30
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You think you're the kind of girl I'd be comfortable enough not to clean my apartment for.

As a rough measure of compatibility: if you think that the existence of "Chicken Soup for the Horse Lover's Soul" is absolutely hilarious, we'd probably get along.