Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Oh...you were finally able to tear yourself away from the pics, I
see! Welcome, welcome. If you're a waitress, nurse/nursing student
or guidance counselor then you have come to the right place. We
probably would have met out in the wild anyway, so you may as well
get it over with right here and now.
If you are dumb, then just leave. No, I mean it. All my friends
give me shit that I always go for pretty, dumb girls that have
nothing to offer...and they're right.
I am making some changes around here! So if you are smart, witty,
funny, like to laugh, like to have stimulating intellectual
conversations, know what "redundant" means, and/or wear cute little
hipster glasses, then please stay.
I don't claim to be the "best" guy that you could possibly date,
but I do have a few key advantages over the competition:
1) I am ridiculously charming. That sensation that you're feeling
in the pit of your stomach, having made it this far into the
"summary", is not disappointment...no. It's the little seedling of
charm starting to bud. I work from the inside out.
2) I am a master of supplication. If you are going to Google or
dictionary.com, deduct 300 cool points from your overall score, and
10 points from your IQ score right now.
3) I defy you to stay mad at me (see advantage number 2)
4) Unless by some chance you have already boned Louis CK or Chris
Rock, then I am one of the funniest dudes you will ever meet. At
least, that's what my friends say.
But wait, there's more!!!
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
What am I doing with my life? Hmmm...well, I guess by filling out
this profile I instantly qualify for the group that is doing "less"
By day I am a broker for an international electronics firm. Don't
ask...the short of it is that I sell stuff for way more money than
I bought it for.
By night I'm a DJ/producer. Now, if you're a reasonably good
looking woman, I am SURE that you have heard that before; many more
times than you wish to remember. I am also sure that you've heard
some really shitty music as a result. I promise you, I'm actually
pretty awesome at what I do, and I've had a good deal of success at
it. Insert humble-brag here (_____________________________).
Everyone wants someone that has things to be passionate about in
their lives - creating music is mine.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
- Making other people laugh
- Making myself laugh
- Making music
- Making something out of nothing
- Making great conversation
- Making sure people around me feel safe and comfortable
- Making awkwardness disappear
- Making love...now THAT I have trouble with, but other than that
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My rapist wit...chill out, it's a line from "Dumb & Dumber".
Kudos to you if I didn't have to tell you that.
My sense of humor. I didn't say it was good. I'm just saying its
My style. I clean up nice.
My eyes. My grandma says they're handsome.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
- Shows: Seinfeld, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Louie, Mad Men,
Workaholics, The Wire, Reno 911, etc.
- Movies: Anything that makes me think and/or laugh...not a big fan
of big budget action flicks, but there are some exceptions. I'm way
more Wes Anderson than Jerry Bruckheimer. If you know what that
means without googling, then I want to talk to you.
- Music: 90's hip hop, 70's soul & funk. I assure you, I'm
- Food: Anything except Asian...that's right, I just X'd out an
entire continent's cuisine! If you can cook, then you just got 10
pounds lighter in my eyes.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
In no particular order...
- My headphones
- My iPod
- My record collection (in the thousands)
- My MacBook
- My sneakers (I'm an 80's baby - gimme a break)
- My MPC - it's complicated, I'm more than happy to explain later
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
- My goals & ambitions.
- My Music
- My fears & how to get over them
- My strengths & how to exploit them
- Beautiful women!
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Hopefully out with friends having some drinks. If not, then I'm
working on some music, but I try to get my music work done during
the week, so as to free up the weekend for lovely young ladies such
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I don't give a damn if I was president of the United
States...picking out which cereal(s) to buy would STILL be the
hardest decision I make all week.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
- You want to have a great first phone call...I'm awesome on the
- You grossly undervalue your own time
- You understand and utilize the concept of sarcasm for the
enjoyment of yourself and others (see above - not the first two
reasons you should message me. The whole thing)
- You want to have fun sometime in the near future with someone of
the opposite sex.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.