Oh hello. I didn't see you come in. I was too busy being Fancy and
Interesting. You may be asking yourself "Dear Myself, what am I
doing on OkCupid and why do I like this guy so much?"
Luckily, the answer to both questions follows thusly: You are on
OkCupid in order to learn the Art Of Fanciness. And I can teach
I consider myself lucky to have navigated the rise and fall of a
serious long term relationship. I've gotten a closeup view of long
term monogamy (5 years) as well as how to transition from monogamy
to nonmonoetcetera. It has afforded me the privilege of knowing
What The Fuck I Want In A Serious Relationship (WTFIWIASR) at the
young age of 26. I feel like most people my age don't have this
experience, which partially explains why so many of my peers still
aspire to be monogamous.
What I’m doing with my life
I live in Oaxaca learning about permaculture, social movements, how
not to die of a snake bite, how not to die of dysentery, how not to
die of malaria, how not to die of a scorpion sting, and how not to
die of exhaustion whilst farming in the jungle. I shall also be
teaching the Fine English Language (FEL). I plan to install myself
semipermanently in some type of hippie eco-village or
permaculture/intentional community. If you have advice (or even
questions) about this, message me! I desperately want to meet
like-minded people from all countries and backgrounds.
I’m really good at
My most obvious talent is placing beautiful words together in a
Very Fancy Prose Style (VFPS) that is evocative, redolent, and
intriguing. You may be aware of writers such as F. Scot
Fitzgerrings, Ernst Hemmings, George McOrwelles, Winston P
Churchsteins, Ian McEwok, and Christoff Hitchensts. They all
consider me to be a superior Writerman.
Perhaps you and I should determine which of us is the more fancy
The first things people usually notice about me
They notice my name (which they usually like a lot). Then they
notice my glorious pecs, biceps, quads, deltoids, calves,
abdominoids, and other Attractive Physical Features (APFs).
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Musics: Fancy Gogol Bordello, Fancy Devotchka, Fancy Britney
Spears, Fancy Rammstein, Fancy Tonino Carotone, Fancy Calle 13,
Fancy Junior Senior, Daft Punk (the fancy years), et ceteras.
Writings: I can only read the best of writings from the best of
writers like Ernst Hemings, Richard Darkwings, Zombie Orwells,
Malcolm Xs, Scott Fitzgerolds, Christoff Hitchends, Neal
Stephensonians, Jack P Skellingtons, RL Stines, and the Stephens
(Kings and Hawkings), et ceteras.
Food: fancy cigars, fancy wine.
The six things I could never do without
Micheladas, mi novia, libros, sexo (obvi), y mangos. That's 6
I spend a lot of time thinking about
whether I could marry someone who isn't desperately in love with
Also, if you don't think this video:
is the best vid on the internet, we're not right for each other,
not even for a one night stand. Sorry, but you just have no soul.
You're worse than Genghis Khan.
On a typical Friday night I am
Plotting the collapse of civilization. My alter ego (Zombie Orwell)
also plans the collapse of civilization, but with different
motives. Follow him on twitter (@zombieorwell) for more exciting
informations. Or follow @mexicopodcast for fancy informations about
the history of Mexico.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm not as fancy as I pretend to be.
You should message me if
Here's the situation, ladies and gents. I am in a blissfully happy,
fulfilling and committed relationship with the love of my life.
Lucky for me, she happens to be the sort of girl permits me to have
my fun in my limited free time... As you can imagine, I'm looking
for someone who shares similar interests and temperament and with
whom I share palpable sexual chemistry.
Obviously I'm looking more for a FWB arrangement, but a real
connection, sense of respect and ability to be completely
communicative is of utmost importance. Without the mental
connection, the build up and the ongoing sexual tension that comes
with legitimate chemistry, I get crazy bored. I need someone who is
challenging, who will make me think and laugh.
The preceding 2 paragraphs have been appropriated and paraphrased
from a lovely girl in Portland whose profile makes my spine tingle
with joy :)