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39 Pittsburgh, PA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–28
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Today – 3:38am
6′ 1″ (1.85m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Atheism, and laughing about it
Cancer, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of masters program
Open relationship
Mostly non-monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), Latin (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm doing some literal and metaphorical housecleaning after escaping a dreadful job in the best possible way.

Starting a new company building educational software that should have a sideline as a new framework for writing experimental fiction while being the house-spouse/superintendent/landscaper/landlord of my big goofy house in Friendship while watching movies, riding my bike, networking, figuring out how to make myself and the world around me a little better.

I still dress as the Toxic Avenger or Sgt. Kabukiman, N.Y.P.D. for Troma once in a while, though I'm more often found riding around town in ludicrous short shorts or attempting to look professional (short shorts and a tie) to convince nerds that I know what I'm talking about.

I'm in a long-term relationship with (and engaged to) a very special lady and somehow have enough time, luck, positive feelings, and optimism that I can be on here looking for other neat women to hang out with, befriend, date, and/or fool around with.

Finding a new girlfriend here would be ideal. New friends are always cool too, as I still don't know a ton of people here in Pittsburgh. I'm leaving 'casual sex' as something I'm looking for here since it happens once in a while (especially if I'm on a trip or whatever) but it's not my real goal. And if I didn't put it in, you'd assume I was a liar, liar, and my pants were on fire.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Learning stuff, petting cats, looking at cats, wondering where cats are. Helping cats keep the squirrels too frightened to chew their way into the attic.

Hanging things from convenient branches, trying not to fall off of my roof.

Making sure I'm not the one, mandatory person at a Meetup who hasn't put on deodorant.

Trying to write my second feature-length screenplay, although I keep flipping between too many different ones I want to write to actually DO it.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Loving 'Robocop' and emulating him in every aspect of my life. Eating baby food, staying out of trouble, recalling my grisly near-death, calling myself 'Murphy' at the end.


Telling embarrassing stories about myself.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I can probably tell what you wrote here just by looking at your picture.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
* my family: my fiancé and our 41 pounds of cats
* my friends: various weirdos
* electricity: everything
* my bike: fun
* dirt: it gives me fruits, flowers, and weedy enemies to vent my spleen upon...I'm looking at you, dandelion
* Alex Murphy, Robocop.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Gorilla gorilla gorilla was cool before buffalo buffaloed buffalo.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Man, I already went into too much embarrassing detail on my Fet Life account. And that still made me feel like a raging vanilla failure of a hedonist.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You have difficulty feeling embarrassment.
You crave the company of an ersatz Bradley Cooper or Hugh Laurie light. Or a bearded Eddie Deezen.