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22 M Denton, TX

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Virgo, and it’s fun to think about
Working on university
Entertainment / Media
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
English (Fluently), Japanese (Okay), Spanish (Okay)

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My self-summary
My first year of college, my entire floor was sitting around a table and we were posed the question: "what's a special talent you have?" I buckled under pressure and did the only thing I knew how... a Richard Nixon impression.

Some days I'm a pirate, some days I'm a superhero, most days I'm asleep, and every day I'm ridiculous.

So... hey, I'm Justin. It's nice to meet you!
What I’m doing with my life
I refuse to grow up, and I'm looking to make a career out of it.

Radio/Television major at UNT. I'm very interested in voice acting and audio engineering. I've recorded for a handful of video games for PC and Xbox 360, among others.

For examples of recent voice acting things, hit up

Just moved from Maryland to Dallas to finish up school. It's literally my first time here, where am I?

I have 4000 followers on tumblr... am I sexy now?
I’m really good at
Dodging red shells, Patrick Warburton impressions, the letter L in Scattergories, mixing delicious Mario-themed drinks, typing in all caps when I get too excited about something, making terrible puns, forgetting to charge my laptop, reading people's okcupid profiles in wacky voices, and never getting the goddamn shortcuts in Candy Land.

Uh huh, laugh it up, Queen Frostine--you're not even candy.
The first things people usually notice about me
Probably my hair or eyes? Or maybe my ridiculously animated eyebrows.

I mean, really, these things have a mind of their own.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Of Mice and Men, A Game of Thrones, The Phantom Tollbooth, Don Quixote, The Good Earth, Cookin' with Coolio, anything by Neil LaBute, David Sedaris, J. R. R. Tolkein, George R. R. Martin, Big Willy Shakes, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't own three Calvin and Hobbes anthologies.

Movies: The Dark Knight, American Psycho, Pacific Rim, In the Company of Men, Tim and Eric's Billion Dollar Movie, There Will Be Blood, Frost/Nixon, A Beautiful Mind, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Ms. Doubtfire, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Primal Fear, Donkey Kong and the Legend of the Crystal Coconut, everything Disney and Pixar (Toy Story 3 had me bawling), pretty much all Hitchcock, Kurosawa, Yimou, and Miyazaki; and I'll fight anyone who says Donald Duck in Mathmagic Land isn't a cinematic masterpiece.

Television: GAME OF FUCKING THRONES, Breaking Bad, One Piece, Seinfeld, South Park, Dexter, Always Sunny, Arrested Development, Tim and Eric, Harvey Birdman, True Blood, Archer, Gravity Falls, Cowboy Bebop, Adventure Time, Dexter's Lab and Johnny Bravo.

Music: I'm sure we've got some common ground here somewhere, I listen to a wide variety of ridiculous jams.

Song Currently Stuck in my Head:
"Rather Be" - Clean Bandit

Food: I'm definitely not picky. Burritos, sushi, the occasional hotdog wrapped in bacon. I like my food spicy; you can win my heart with a bottle of jalapeño tabasco sauce. I like my hot sauce like I like my women: soaked in a little salt and vinegar and aged for three years in white oak barrels.
The six things I could never do without
1. Shrek
2. Shrek 2
3. Shrek the Third
4. Shrek Forever After
5. Shrek The Halls
6. Shrek in the Swamp Karaoke Dance Party

It's ogrewhelming to be honest
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Wumbology, the study of Wumbo.
On a typical Friday night I am
Clad in spandex and a cape, lurking on the rooftops and thwarting crime by moonlight (whether that implies I'm Batman or Sailor Moon is for you to decide).
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm a smurf.

I was gonna say snork, but would anyone even get that?

This song runs through my head 24/7 -
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–23
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You want to be the Jessie to my James. Protect the world from devastation, unite all peoples within our nation, you know.

I'm tired of being INTERNET ALLURING, let's just be cute and hang out.