Find better matches with our advanced matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy

very_funny_guy

52 M Oakland, CA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 7:27am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
Athletic
Diet
Smokes
No
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Never
Religion
Judaism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Capricorn, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Management
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Has kids
Pets
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I am a professional who finds time to keep very fit and active. I am what Malcolm Gladwell refers to as a connector, which means I like to meet people and stay in touch with them. While that probably means that I spend too much time on Facebook, I will say in no uncertain terms that I do not spend my days tending a virtual farm (and will stop playing Candy Crush as soon as I get through a few more levels). In reality, I am much more comfortable communicating in the real world than I am over the internet (although I probably text more often than I should). And, I was thinking that it might actually be nice to have a relationship in the real world, rather than just on the internet.

I like to play sports where people try to hurt me. In my younger days, I was a beach volleyball player. Then I switched to playing basketball most mornings. In the past few years, I have become a soccer addict. I am currently on two indoor teams and one outdoor team. Between these sports, I have been able to accumulate a relatively complete set of body braces (knees, ankles, wrist, elbow, fingers, crutches, etc.), and underwent knee surgery at the end of August 2012.

I am a numbers guy at heart and, according to my kids, a bit of a geek (I think they meant this in a nice way). I have a tendency to remember numbers and dates and see patterns and trends (don't expect accurate counting or complex multiplication, I am not Rain Man). My mind is filled with useless information (batting averages, state capitals, song lyrics), but I don't have a really good way to access the information. I am the kind of guy who will remember the birthdays of all your friends and family, the phone numbers of my best friends in elementary school, and the words to Bennie and the Jets, but forget the two things that I was supposed to get at the supermarket, the present that I bought for myself and had my kids wrap, and whatever it was that you did yesterday that bothered me.

I would like to meet the one woman that I will spend the next few decades of my life with, but I am not rushing into anything. I have a good life and would be ok with dating different people until the right person comes along. I am not sure what that person will look like. I like to meet people with lots of energy, who like to laugh (sense of humor required), who like to play (periodically channeling your inner child is a plus), and who are willing to accept that I will do some stupid things as part of this process because making mistakes is the way that I tend to learn (I try not to make the same mistake more than once, so you may get the opportunity to watch me do stupid things you have never seen before).

I believe in honesty. The age on my profile is my age in real life (they didn't ask how old I act, how old I feel or the average age of the players on the soccer teams I play on). I am not sure why some people make up ages, and I have trouble understanding how starting off with a lie can lead to an honest relationship (if you are only interested in my body and not my mind, please make that clear up front).

I also believe in common courtesy. That may not be the right term for it anymore, because it seems less and less common. I try to treat people the way I would like to be treated. I am far from perfect at it, but that is my goal. If you send me a message, I will respond. If I think we are clearly not a fit, my response will be very short, but I will not leave you wondering.

I am high energy, usually thinking, and always laughing
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I am looking for someone that I want to spend time with. Until I find that person, I tend to keep busy.

I started teaching at a business school about 2 years ago, and am really enjoying this part-time part of my life. I teach one or two courses a year, so I consider this more of a hobby than a job.

I am also the CFO of a non-profit startup that works with young men and women between the ages of 16 and 25 who have not been taught some of the fundamental skills needed for success (planning, organizing, teamwork, etc.).

In addition, I run a small consulting firm, which lets me work with government agencies across the United States. This has allowed me to reconnect with friends from elementary school, junior high, high school and college who have spread out across the country.

My latest hobby is standup comedy. After having knee surgery in 2012, I needed to find something to do that did not involve running. I started performing at comedy clubs in SF at the beginning of the year. Most of my material involves my family. I should make it clear up front that no matter how much good material you intend to provide me, I do not talk about my ex-wife or any ex-girlfriends while I am on stage.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My hair

My eyes

My smile

My sarcastic wit
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Chocolate

I love going to live performances. In the past year, I have been to see musicians like Bruce Springsteen, The Stones, Bon Jovi, Green Day, Jackson Browne, Wilco, Jason Mraz, Train, Michael Franti and Spearhead, Jane's Addiction, The B-52s, and Madness (along with some others that I am having trouble remembering. I post pictures of the concerts on Facebook to help my memory), and also comedians like Maz Kobrani, Kevin Nealon and Steven Wright. And, I am a straight guys who does not mind admitting that I like musicals.

Chocolate

I like going to movies. Some of my all-time favorites include: Casablanca, Citizen Kane, The Dark Knight, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Caddyshack. I have fallen behind on current movies, though, and am a big fan of the type of mindless action films targeted at teenage boys that come out during the summer.

Chocolate

I will listen to almost any type of music, although I don't like modern rap or funeral dirges or whatever the music is called where they scream and play the guitar loudly for no apparent reason. As a former NJ resident, I tend to have a bias toward artists from the Garden State. Some artist that have been in my cars CD player recently include:
Springsteen
Bon Jovi
Green Day
Barenakedladies
The Who
The Beatles
Weezer
Crash Test Dummies
Willie Nelson
James Taylor
Johnny Cash
Foo Fighters

Dark Chocolate

I read more than most. I like finding authors that I enjoy and go through as many of their books as I can. Michael Crichton, John Grisham, Dan Brown (don't waste your time with his books that don't have Robert Langdon as the protagonist), Michael Connelly, Isaac Asimov, Robert Zelazny, Larry Niven, Scott Adams, Michael Lewis, Ken Blanchard, Jim Collins, Malcolm Gladwell (tends to be hit and miss. loved Tipping Point and Outliers. disappointed with Blink).
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
my kids (they are in their 20s now, so I don't get to spend as much time with them)

diet coke (it is not just for breakfast anymore)

chocolate (don't act shocked by this one)

friends (I mean people who I have gotten to know in the real world, not just connected to on Facebook, who like to remind me of many of the stupid things I have done over the years)

an internet connection (I can stop anytime I want. Really)

warm weather (I prefer hot, hot, hot over cold)
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
In the past three months (March thru Memorial Day), my Friday evenings have consisted of 5 standup comedy performances, 4 evenings of soccer (I was playing 3 games a night on Fridays, but did not sign up to play this season), one evening hanging with elementary school friends in NJ, one evening on a boat cruise on the bay with my students, one evening at the Bottle Rock Napa Valley festival and one evening watching Steven Wright.
I’m looking for
  • Straight girls only
  • Ages 39–53
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you meet at least 3 of the following criteria:

1. You like to laugh (at the things I do, the things you do, the idiots inhabiting the world around us, etc., and won't mind me laughing at almost everything).

2. You like to compete in a positive way (if you are the kind of person who thinks you have to bend the rules because winning is more important than your integrity, don't bother).

3. You have a lot of energy to burn (and like doing it by running, or biking, or hitting a ball, or throwing a disk, or hitting the dance floor, or.....).

4. You like a guy with a brain