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42 Oakland, CA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 33-50
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
May 18
Relationship Type
Mostly non-monogamous
6' 0" (1.83m)
Body Type
Christianity and it’s important
Has kid(s) and might want more
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
When my kid was two, he asked "why are we here," and this was my answer: "to decrease the amount of suffering in the world, and to explore, and the best way to decrease suffering is to love people as hard as you can." He seemed to buy it. If that seems at all right to you, here's some more details:

I'm a political activist and writer, working on building better tools for democracy and getting the novel I've completed a draft of published somehow. I'm in an amazing open marriage that blows my mind on a daily basis and we are having a blast raising our kid. Between connections to a couple of wonderful communities and my extended family constellation I've got a lot of friends and love in my life. But I've found that there's basically almost always room for more connection - with just the right person, at least.

This was leftover from how okcupid used to work (describe yourself in three words), but I kinda liked it: I am intentional, insatiable, and insanely lucky.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Generally, I like things. I love music and dj a little and I love reading (always looking for a recommendation, especially fiction) and I try to get outside whenever I can. I've developed an every day yoga practice somehow (this still surprises me!) and run a couple times a week. I sailed and skied a fair amount as a kid so I still try to make those happen when I can. I'm a Giants fan and like catching the occasional game. And by catching I mean, watching - not filling in for the guy squatting behind home plate. That looks really damn hard.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I've been getting some really great feedback on my skills as a lover lately. Being in decent physical shape and being emotionally open helps, but it's one of the best things about open relationships. You just plain get more practice!
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My searing intellect, chiseled good looks, rounded buttocks and emotional warmheartedness just kind of hit you all at once. I understand it's quite overwhelming.

Seriously though, the last person to notice me out of the blue said, "hi, mind if I objectify you a bit?" Make what you want of that!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I've been reading a ton of nonfiction and economics, so I'm always looking for nonfiction recommendations. My top five movies are something like A Room With a View, The Mission, Until the End of the World, Almost Famous and, hm, maybe Short Bus. I listen to and play electronic stuff from all genres but diversity is the thing I love the most about music. I really am into everything. Foodwise I'm doing a fairly strict low-carb, lotsa veggies and grilled things type thing. I love food and cooking and I'm decent at it.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Everything, including thinking about what I can do to stop thinking so damn much about stuff.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Cooking a nice dinner, drinking some nice wine, putting my kiddo to sleep and then having happy fun grownup time in front of a fire.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm going to have to give this some more thought.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
...if you own a pair of running shoes (ok, and you use them I suppose) and you occasionally crack a book, there's a pretty good chance we'll click. I was joking about this to my wife the other day but she says it's true, and maybe it is. I'm appreciative, nice and fun. Looking for other folks in stable open relationships in particular!