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33 Auburn, CA Gender Nonconforming, Man

Gender Nonconforming, Man

Similar users

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 21-40
  • Located anywhere
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My details

Last online
Nov 24
6' 2" (1.88m)
Body Type
Other but it’s not important
Doesn’t have kids but might want them
Has cats
English (Fluently), French (Somewhat), Japanese (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Now completely rewriting my profile for the third time!

Let's get this out of the way immediately. I am far from a typical male or a typical anything and that's how I like it. When it comes to dating and my personal sexuality, I consider myself a submissive genderplayer, which means I worship women to the extent that I like to play in their world. As such, I'm only really compatible with women who are sexually dominant and at least a little bisexual. Although I'm very attracted to transwomen, I would never fetishize them. Hell, I don't even think I would fetishize a porn star. I'm too curious about people's personal struggles to indulge in a shallow relationship. As to the extent by which I gender play, I'll share that if you are interested and not a total asshat about it (obviously, my pictures don't really reflect that part of me).

That was my sexual disclaimer, but it isn't the alpha and omega of who I am. I'm a Taoist who loves pop culture. I'm an autodidactic learner, constantly seeking to acquire new knowledge and skills. I see myself as a writer, first and foremost, although the only things I've ever published were technical manuals. I have broad tastes in film, television, music, games, and comics. I can discuss these things endlessly with the right person. There is only one thing I like more than a good story and that is good company to share it with.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Well, I tried the smart, practical life that leads to marriage, a house, and children, but that wasn't really working for me. I dropped out of civilized society to work on my creative interests, but that was more difficult than I expected so I've gone freelance, picking up interesting jobs like construction and caregiving for a wonderful disabled woman who I feel very fortunate to help. I'd much rather make a small amount of money knowing that I made the world a better place, than make a large amount of money knowing that I made it a worse place. So if you are looking for a sugar daddy, it ain't me.

Other than that, I'm embracing my unique sexuality (see above). I often feel judged for being different, though people tend to assume that I am the same douchy guy as everyone else. Although I do not consider myself gay, bi, or trans, I am starting to consider myself part of the queer community rather than just an ally. My sexuality may not have a lobby, but it isolates me from the rest of society just as much and hiding that part of me has been just as damaging to my psyche (hence the profile rewrite).
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I'm a sensitive guy with a unique understanding of people and the world around me. I think I missed my calling as a therapist because I'm often the person people want to talk to when they are dealing with something difficult. I don't consider myself a people-person, but that's only because most people hide their true feelings, making them dangerous to themselves and others. I'm very good with those who are open with their feelings (including children and animals). This innate sensitivity even carries over in massage because I'm very skilled at detecting and relieving tension.

I'm also a "big ideas" guy. I spend a lot of time thinking about politics, philosophy, economics, the future, the past, where we went wrong... As Marc Maron says, "I'm doing the big work: making a world that functions in my head." It's like a model society of ideas in my brain, but if someone doesn't do it, how will we ever make a functioning society?

I write like a motherfucker. I can write anything. The trick is finding the proper motivation. I got a standing ovation to a paper I wrote in 6th grade. I've gotten A's on essay questions when I had no idea what the answer was. I write comedy, drama, horror... Anything the occasion calls for, but I always want to leave an impression, even if I'm writing a service manual.

I should also mention that I like to cook, since so many women seem interested in that. I mostly cook off recipes, but I like to challenge myself by trying something new as much as possible. I'm currently working on my baking skills but I can't get my %$#@ing cookies to spread!! (Yes, probably need to use more butter. That'll be my next try...)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
This is my arena. I was a film major and television addict, so my tastes are both broad and sophisticated. I'm totally open to trying new things, but as a cinephile, my palette is refined, so I may roll my eyes if you like cheesy movies/television. However, I do not discriminate against low brow entertainment. Life grows in shit, not on diamonds. There is more wisdom to be gained from the low brow than the high brow... even if its often unintentional.

FILM: There are way too many to name. I love the comedies of Mel Brooks, Steve Martin, Peter Sellers, Woody Allen, the Monty Python crew, Kevin Smith, Charlie Chaplin, the Marx Brothers, and the Zucker brothers (early work). I love the Marvel superhero films (for the most part), the Dark Knight trilogy, and Tim Burton Batman films, but I hate Fox's X-Men and DC's upcoming assault on human decency. I have a particular fondness for cinema in the eighties, particularly odd comedies (Ghostbusters, The Jerk, Vacation) and violent sci-fi action movies (Robocop, Terminator, Predator, Big Trouble in Little China).

TV: I'm a Trekkie who loves the first three Star Trek shows (not a fan of the latter two). My favorite TV shows of all time are Boston Legal, Bored to Death, Louie, and Mad About You. I like shows about weird people trying their hardest to live a decent life. I love all the Joss Whedon shows, but Firefly is my least favorite (heresy, I know). As for cartoons, Venture Brothers is the best thing ever and Gargoyles was my absolute favorite as a kid, but when it comes to anime, nothing beats Cowboy Bebop.

Sidenote: I love watching television with people. Many people seem to think that lacks intimacy, but I think they don't do it right. There is a certain excitement in sharing a story with someone. You can't read a book together, but you can cuddle up on the couch and watch something together. There are few things more intimate than sharing in someone's laughter, fear, and excitement.

BOOKS: I don't read as much as I should. Mostly, I like comics... and don't condescend because a great comic is just as sophisticated as any novel. Although I like X-Men, Batman, Superman, and Daredevil, the really great stuff can be found in Vertigo and independent publishers. Favorites include The Invisibles, The Maxx, Scud: The Disposable Assassin, Transmetropolitan, Preacher, Jonah Hex, Promethea, Strangers in Paradise, and many, many more. As for "book books," the last book I read cover-to-cover was Howard Zinn's A People's History of the United States. Favorites include Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and the Belgariad.

MUSIC: Again, pretty eclectic. I started with early '90s pop and, once I became embarrassed of that, I went to classic '60s/'70s rock over to blues and R&B, then to hip-hop... and then all over the place from there, though I recently returned to early '90s hip-hop. Beatles, Gorillaz, Cibo Matto, Yoko Kanno, Eric Satie, Otis Redding, Louis Armstrong, Digital Underground, MGMT, Cake, Stereo Total, Reggie Watts, Beats Antique, Ween, Fratellis... It changes depending on my mood.

FOOD: Everything... except eggplant which is mealy and disgusting. Many have said they would change my mind on this and some have tried. You can cover up the taste of it and I may enjoy the meal, but that's in spite of the eggplant, not because of it.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I do without many things I could never do without, so I do not understand the question. Let's rephrase.

"Name six things your partner would have to agree to in order to live with you"

Regular kinky sex of the mutually respectful variety, frequently watching my favorite movies/shows together, an endless capacity to discuss geek things (i.e. comics and Star Trek), a passion for social justice and the need to talk about it, visits to local art/entertainment venues, and trips to the beach and/or woods
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
comics, Star Trek, social injustice, movies, sexuality... You know what? If you don't know by now, I really didn't make it clear above.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
No such animal. Sadly, I'm too frequently poor and lonely, watching old movies by myself. I have a list of all the classics and I'm slowly making my way through it.

But if I have the money (and preferably, company), I like to go to any local art and entertainment venues. I love a good standup comedy show, a small musical venue, or a show. Some of my favorite times include seeing a high school production of The Twilight Zone and an Australian steampunk circus (Circus Oz. Look it up!). I also enjoy cultural events and art exhibits, but those are more daytime activities. I don't enjoying going to bars and, if we go to a club, they better have decent music. Although I've never been, I'd really like to see a good burlesque show, though I have no interest in strip clubs.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
By now, you should know if you should message me. Like I said, I'm a sexually submissive genderplayer, so if that's something you are interested in, you probably already know it. And if it isn't, then you definitely already know it. If you think its weird, gross, and pathetic, I don't need you to remind me, so kindly fuck off.

That said, I'm a pretty unique guy, so whether or not we are a match, if any of the above interests you and you just want to make a friend, I'm usually up for it.