First off you should totally call my google voice account and leave me a funny message (734) 252-9299. DO EET. Also if you do the twitter thing you can follow me @ we_suffer.

I am a hot complicated mess. If you feel that you'd like to know me better Lord have mercy on your soul. Also just so you can't say I tried to hide it from you I've got herpes simplex 1. If you've got questions let me know.

I personally believe in the Christian/Judaic God but I follow Noahidism. That is I follow the seven laws of Noah which Judism believes will allow me entry into heaven. The seven laws are

1. Prohibition of Idolatry: You shall not have any idols before God.
2. Prohibition of Murder: You shall not murder. (Genesis 9:6)
3. Prohibition of Theft: You shall not steal.
4. Prohibition of Sexual Promiscuity: You shall not commit any of a series of sexual prohibitions, which include adultery, incest, bestiality and male homosexual intercourse.
5. Prohibition of Blasphemy: You shall not blaspheme God's name.
6. Dietary Law: Do not eat flesh taken from an animal while it is still alive. (Genesis 9:4)
7. Requirement to have just Laws: Set up a governing body of law (eg Courts)

Now I do my best to follow all of these laws and live my life accordingly. I don't think any one could really argue there being anything particularly hard to believe or follow about them except for the idolatry law and the blasphemy law.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLhbjBIqA7g live it, learn it, and you better damn well love it

"There were many times I thought to ask you, but for reasons I will not express here I could never bring myself to do so. Who could have known there was never time? My memory is fragmented and hollow. I keep remembering some photo of us taken a few years before we were born; I think it was from 1982. We went sailing later in life searching for answers to questions we never thought to ask.

Though I may exude an air of confidence or calm I am really falling apart most of the time. I don't believe there has been a single minute in the past few months that I can say my mind has not been my absolute worst enemy and incessant tormentor. I seek refuge in something greater than myself but find it only for a fleeting moment. Like a former lovers perfume upon an autumn breeze.

Often we would watch all the world in water; floating with great effort for some cause we understood to be within the other. There you would lay on the dark mahogany wood floor for great lengths of time. It seemed to me at one time you had become part of the house and in every room your presence could be greatly felt. However we always returned to the bay window at night to gaze upon twinkling stars mirrored off the surface of Lake Tofts. Did you dream as I did, of drowning amongst the stars with no sense of despair?"

The honest to God truth is I am a fucking Wizard. Ok. There. I said it. The cat is out of the bag now. You happy? Now that I've exposed my wizardy secret I am going to be kicked out of the fat wizards guild. Hope you're happy ass hole.

Lets get some things straight right now before we go any further:

• I loved hallucinogens as a teenager. I'm not talking about magic mushrooms; well maybe amanita muscaria but not psilocybin mushrooms. If it were legal I'd still have a proclivity to use hallucinogens. There is nothing more fiercely compelling or life altering than being aware of the grass beneath your feet and the stars above your head.

• I am a firm believer in rooting for the under dog. Because we've all been in that terrible lonely place before.

• If I don't agree with you I don't agree with you. I am 100% completely open to discussion on any subject that I may or may not know about. But you damned conservatives just can't respect other peoples opinions! You're all a bunch of demons parading around in business suits with the souls of the working class in your breast pockets.

• I've come to understand that people are as crazy as the people they point their fingers at; I've pointed my finger at every person I've ever met. What the does that tell you?

• There are only five things in this world that are truly stimulating: Coffee, booze, drugs, sex, and conversation. Most everything else is filler unless you've got people you can do one of the first five things with.

• I love to meet people and get inside their heads and look out. I try to imagine how they view me viewing them.

• I believe if you can't laugh at the absurd, offensive, or yourself you have no business living in a world like this. You're far too serious a person for a world that is already as somber or grim as January 20, 2001.

• I am a difficult man to deal with. I'll love you unconditionally if you allow me my eccentricities and quirks. I've got my highs, lows, plateaus; just like the stock market there is never a guaranteed return with me on your investment/involvement.

The more exotic the sports car the smaller the drivers penis is. Similarly the longer an OKC users profile is the smaller their penis is. This is known as C.P.S. or converse penis syndrome. So for all the ladies take this paragraph how you will.

I want to be your comic relief. The fat guy comic relief. You know the kind. Big, dumb, oafish, but gentle as a lamb. Watch me fall over stuff, watch me become completely flabbergasted when someone of the opposite sex pays even the slightest hint of attention to me, laugh as others try to explain there complex situations in life asking me for help and I reply with simple one word answers! Yes you can have this all today if you act now. Ladies and gentlemen there is no telling how long I’ll be available. Put a bid on the table this instant to give yourself a chance at having me as a personal sidekick, friend, one night stand, emotional punching bag, or someone to get that PPO against. If you call within the next twenty minutes we’ll even include an amazing Buxton Bag!

I'm not the lady killing sort enough to hurt a girl in port.

I find the typical critical/cynical/cyclical demeanor on this site makes this place the largest collection of ass holes in the universe.

< really emo saying > I'll break your heart before you can break mine < / really emo saying >

WARNING: The pure raw awesomeness of we_suffer may leave you blind. We cannot be held responsible for the melting of your face or the blindness that may ensue! Please proceed with extreme caution.

Note: Based on profile activity, we_suffer has been rated by fellow OkCupid users as being 100% fire retardant and guaranteed to lower your cholesterol by as much as 10 points. He has also been nominated for the "Probably Could Take On Christopher Walken" Award for three years in a row.

I'd really like to meet a girl or guy who can show me a thing or two about the blues.

"The Edge... there is no honest way to explain it because the only people who really know where it is are the ones who have gone over." - Hunter S. Thompson

"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die." - Hunter S. Thompson

"And that, I think, was the handle - that sense of inevitable victory over the forces of old and evil. Not in any mean or military sense; we didn't need that. Our energy would simply prevail. We had all the momentum; we were riding the crest of a high and beautiful wave. So now, less than five years later, you can go up on a steep hill in Las Vegas and look west, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark - that place where the wave finally broke and rolled back. " - Hunter S. Thompson

“Identity would seem to be the garment with which one covers the nakedness of the self, in which case, it is best that the garment be loose, a little like the robes of the desert, through which one's nakedness can always be felt, and, sometimes, discerned.” - James Arthur Baldwin

“Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers” - Voltaire

“Life is thickly sown with thorns, and I know no other remedy than to pass quickly through them. The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us.” - Voltaire

“Every man is guilty of all the good he didn't do” - Voltaire

“I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it” - Voltaire

“Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared.” - Buddha

“You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.” - Buddha

“Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth.” - Buddha

“To understand everything is to forgive everything” - Buddha

“When you realize how perfect everything is you will tilt your head back and laugh at the sky” - Buddha

“A jug fills drop by drop.” - Buddha

“The tongue like a sharp knife... Kills without drawing blood.” - Buddha

“There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.” - Friedrich Nietzsche

“I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you” - Friedrich Nietzsche

“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” - Friedrich Nietzsche

“A thought, even a possibility, can shatter and transform us” - Friedrich Nietzsche

“This is what is hardest: to close the open hand because one loves.” - Friedrich Nietzsche

“We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the mental institution of the universe.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“All the knowledge I possess everyone else can acquire, but my heart is exclusively my own.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“If I love you, what business is it of yours?” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“This is the true measure of love: When we believe that we alone can love, that no one could ever have loved so before us, and that no one will ever love in the same way after us” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.” - Winston Churchill

“The price of greatness is responsibility.” - Winston Churchill

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” - Winston Churchill

“You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.” - Winston Churchill

“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” - Winston Churchill

“We shall show mercy, but we shall not ask for it” - Winston Churchill

“Kites rise highest against the wind, not with it.” - Winston Churchill

Leave your ego at the door. An ounce of modesty will get you much further with me than a gallon of pride.

Passions:

Politics
Science
Video Games
Making Music
Writing Lyrics
Egalitarianism
Feminism
Writing Terrible Poetry
Gender Equality
Racial Equality
Reading
Social Equality
Socialism
Writing
Laughter

I ask that if you are going to message or IM me please follow a few simple rules:

1) Do not expect me to carry the conversation or do all the talking, unless you are interviewing me. :P

2) Do not start a message off with “I think you are cute/hot/sexy/whatever. Such introductions seem shallow or halfhearted at best and trite at worst.

3) Do not message me in hopes that I can save you from yourself. I am no ones savior.

4) Please do not type LiKe tHiS. Also please do not use abbreviations such as u 4 or r as they come off as very disrespectful. If you are going to take the time to message me please put effort into your communication.

5) I advise you to know the difference between there/their/they’re, your/you’re and to/too/two. However I am not a grammar fanatic as my grammar skills are severely lacking.

WTF? (｡_｡ヾ σ_σ

TESTIMONIALS

Warning: Please be advised that we_suffer is not as narcissistic as this section may make him seem. While these testimonials are real they are displayed for humor purposes only.

"we_suffer is what we of the Eastern persuasion call a da-ren. Simply put, he is a Grand Master of the mojo, a guru; a lift of his finger channels the chi of the Universe in such a way as to shape the course of events 150 million years into the future. Yes, kids, he's that powerful.

Oh yes, he's also secretly Asian. That's the best part." - defysys

"I think I need some vitamin B." - startart7

"Hahaha it was like tingles down my spine. Your lips are so soft. Ahmazing! lol I didn't want to stop." - cleveralterego

"I think just reading your profile made me +10 logic.

*claps*" - MoonFlare

"You can be kind of a dick, sometimes you completely ignore me, even after you have felt me up." - StarTart7

"You flush the toilet "Always" *applauds*" - Azav

"Your profile is the most extensively filled out profile I have ever seen on okcupid. It's intensity made me smile and I felt oddly compelled to share that with you. I don't expect a response, mostly because I have given you nothing to respond to.. :) And with that... Enjoy the rest of your day.." - meleekitten

"Wicked profile....very cool." - Groovybbw

"You're like a caveman meets biker Neo." - denverbronco82

"I just wanted to tell you, that if you weren't far away and in love with someone else I would try to woo you. Not okcupid stupid woo, but actually woo ;) You seem like a wonderful person" - revolutionikita

"you take away all the fun
no woos
no cuteness

i have a feeling none of my
totally awesome pickup lines
would work on you" - missxholly

"lol but you'd probably only lose just enough so you COULD, then you'd end up one of those people we see a discover channel show 10 years from now about shocking deaths. You scrote dived so quickly you broke your back and were stuck and died of starvation. Not even your bacon balls could save you. Eventually petrifying into a husk before being found, a living monument to your shame. And you become another deliciously macabre piece of mythos for elemetary school boys to tell each other "Dude, don't lick your balls! I heard a guy died that way!! No seriously it was a guy at another school's cousin!!" And we here at the success-fail forums will mourn. And we'll say "Goddamn, couldn't he have just ate bacon instead?? What a fucker!" - becca_luv in response to me stating that if my balls tasted like bacon I might loose enough weight to lick them

"Dude lawl. Your sideburns are totally hot." - Msz0mbi3Sex

"You have a way with words. Indeed. +_+" - >

"this is my second time doing the okcupid thing and I've probably spent more time on your profile than on any other profile that I've ever come across. ;)" - mysong84

"You seem like a real person who can accept others flaws wich is rare to find these days." - havewingstofly5

"Seriously, I love hoe honest and upfront you are . Its like a breath of fresh air to see someone say openly "This is who I am....I have faults, I've made mistakes, I have passion." Anyway, just wanted to give you kudos. I would love to talk to you some more." - zombiejew86

"you've totally rockin face pubes." - Fiction_lust

"Your septum is really cute." - jollyliloyster

"I fucking love your blogs. Just thought I'd tell ya. Hilarious and also so true." - MarissaC0630

"so for some reason i can't reply at your journal, but i'm pretty interested in what you said. it seems like you think women are only attracted to a certain type of man, but there are as many different tastes as there are girls in the world, and you don't have to have oiled up egg-carton abs (bleh) to be attractive. as far as pretty goes, i think people just have different ways of expressing their attraction and for whatever reason some are predispositioned to use the word pretty. i agree it's not the most masculine modifier, but it is a nice compliment. and anyway, you are kinda pretty..." - autophobia

"You are the awesome sauce!" - PleasntlyPlump

"I find your profile really fascinating. You seem like an interesting, honest person who's willing to talk and share." - everydaydreams

"You look like a heavy metal Tom Cruise" - Deleted User

"You're really handsome. Your eyes are really enthralling, like they contain the mysteries of the world." - krishaheen

"You are the prettiest big guy I have ever met." - StarTart7

"we_suffer reminds me of the lead singer of smash mouth, and thats not a bad thing" - slaydonkeypunch

"yes my child you're learning the ways of murderers and thieves. oh wait lol you're the murderer and thief that I learned from." - shoegayzer

"'I say that you have combined features of Kevin Smith and Dave Navarro, with eyes that I could get lost in." - StarTart7

"FACT: A few of your exes, the ones you were best to, will always love you. Nice going." - OKCupid Test

Where there is nothing everything is fulfilled
Where there is nothing everything is in its place
Where there is everything nothing is fulfilled
Where there is everything nothing is in its place

It is in the darkest void that one sees most clearly.
When you are blind that is when you can see everything.
It is when one sees most clearly they are in the darkest void.
When you can see everything that is when you are blind.

All your questions are outside of you and all the answers are within you.

There I was. Alone in a room with the most hideous beast imaginable. It's eyes filled with a wild lust I had never before seen, but have since not been able to forget despite my best efforts. Through acid trips to the outer reaches of the universe and back, the endless depraved depths of a four day weekend ether binge, to drinking gallons of whiskey made in long forgotten forests of the Appalachian mountains those eyes have haunted my every waking moment. Utterly relentless those leering orbs of horror and suffering often haunt my sleep, turning images of reunions with lost loved ones and riches beyond my wildest dreams into scenes of murder and mayhem beset on all sides by a barrage of cacophonous screams. Still at this very moment I can feel them gazing upon me, boring a whole into my soul so that the hell spawn demon can pour itself into me. There is no escape from this curse it is mine and mine alone to endure for all eternity. Now and then I catch myself looking into a mirror and to my dismay I see the two terrors looking out from my own skull. Perched on each side of my nose as if to say "you and us, we are. We are inseparable, we are entwined, we are one, we are you, and you are us." I will not allow that to happen good reader, I promise you that. I will take my two hands and gouge my eyes out until my sockets are nothing but vacant.

I am a phallic fantasy of decadent ecstasy. (someone actually said this to me -_-)

Gregory House is the hottest fictional male character ever.

I like Spam. There I said it.

I've got a seriously screwed sense of humor which I am in constant internal conflict over.

I'm a human in an inhumane world trying to make some sort of difference in the lives of the people around me.

I doubt myself and my abilities constantly. I'm told it is aggravating.

I've been told I am an amazing story teller.

There is always an internal struggle within me about what is right and what is wrong. More importantly which path do I take?

I've been called ruthless, evil, mean, cold, soulless, heartless and distant. But I've also been called loving, warm, inviting, funny, amazing, and giving. There are two sides to everybody. I refuse to keep one side completely hidden. To those who get to see my less pleasant side I apologize, it is nothing personal.

In reality I am the single most laid back person I know. I hate drama irl. I have the patience of a saint and the sex drive of a priest! ZIING!

We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like “I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive... .” And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Las Vegas. And a voice was screaming: “Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?” Then it was quiet again. My attorney had taken his shirt off and was pouring beer on his chest, to facilitate the tanning process. “What the hell are you yelling about?” he muttered, staring up at the sun with his eyes closed and covered with wraparound Spanish sunglasses. “Never mind,” I said. “It’s your turn to drive.” I hit the brakes and aimed the Great Red Shark toward the shoulder of the highway. No point mentioning those bats, I thought. The poor bastard will see them soon enough.

Editors

• MysTifyLemon

I am living it. Making mistakes. Experiencing victories and failures. Learning more about myself every day. Trying to navigate the thin line between heart and mind.

I started my first true semester of college this fall. I plan on becoming a journalist/web designer. I hope to get a job with one of the blogging firms like Gawker Media.

I try to find something to be grateful for every day or at least something to meditate and reflect upon.

1) Making Lists
2) I think I am an excellent listener
3) Being me
4) Making the insanely simple obscenely complicated
5) Being a friend
6) Writing
7) Laughing at really inappropriate things

1) Septum piercing
2) Labret piercing
3) Tattoo
4) Beard
5) I am a big guy.
6) Shaved head with a Fidel Castro hat atop it.

I love video games, sci-fi stuff, technology, and science.

Music: 3 Inches of Blood, 8 Bit Weapon, A Life Once Lost, Abigail Washburn & The Sparrow Quartet, Adventure Kid, Ani Difranco, Animal Collecttive, Aphex Twin, Apoptygma Berzerk, Asphodel Fields, Arborea, Basshunter, Batmobile, Bayside, Ben Folds Five, Bit Mummy, Black Moth Super Rainbow, Bone Orchard Revival, Breakbot, Buckethead, Cake, Chiodos, Cof Cof, Clutch, Crispin Hellion Glover, CSS, Daft Punk, Daniel Johnston, Danny Elfman, Dave Matthews Band, David Bowie, Days Of The new, Death Cab For Cutie, Danger, devilinside, Diablo Swing Orchestra, Dr. Steel, Einsturzende Neubauten, Elliott Smith, Emilie Autumn, Emmanuel Jal, Everything But The Girl, Flogging Molly, Flying Lotus, From The Future, Genitorturers, gODHEAD, Gogol Bordello, Goldfrapp, Gorillaz, Gotan Project, Grandaddy, Hackensaw Boys, Haifa Wahbe, Haint Flannery, Heaven Shall Burn, Horrorpops, Hooverphonic, Inbred, Iron Horse, Jack Conte, Julia Nunes, Justin Timberlake, Kanye West, Keen Kousins, Kimya Dawson, King Automatic, Kitty In A Casket, Koby Israelite, Kokusyoku Sumire, kwest the madd lad, La Roux, Ladytron, Laurie Anderson, Leftover Crack, Liu Fang, Lovage, MACHINEMADE GOD, Marilyn Manson, Massive Attack, Matmos, Matthew Shipp, mc chris, Mike Doughty, Mike Patton, Misery Signals, Monsters & Mannequins, Monster Magnet, Mr. Oizo, MSTRKRFT, Nana Kitade, Narcissus, Nataly Dawn, Nine Inch Nails, Nirvana, NOFX, Oingo Boingo, Okkervil River, Opeth, Paul Potts, Peeping Tom, Pepe Deluxé, Piebald, Pink Floyd, Pomplamoose, Portishead, Queens Of The Stone Age, Radiation 4, Rafflesia, Rammstein, Reverend Deadeye, Reverend Payton's Big Damn Band, Robert M, Saves The Day, She Wants Revenge, Stereo Total, That 1 Guy, The Avett Brothers, The Beatles, The Blow, The Candy Spooky Theater, The Creepshow, The Dropkick Murphys, The Electric Mountain Rotten Apple Gang, The Frogs, The Hackensaw Boys, The Hellblinki Sextet, The Knife, The Koffin Kats, Thee Merry Widows, The Moldy Peaches, The Natural Yogurt Band, The Police, The Quakes, The Reverend Peyton's Big Damn Band, The Twelves, The White Stripes, Thievery Corporation, Thom Yorke, Tomahawk, Voltaire, Wolfsheim, ::wumpscut::, Yelle, Zeno Tornado & The Boney Google Brothers

In case you don't recognize some of the band names listed above I HIGHLY recommend you give them a listen. There is a mix of alternative, folk, blue grass, industrial, punk, rock, and more! If you have any bands to suggest please let me know. Music is my life! Also I have really been getting into blues lately. Something about the hiss and crackle of ancient vinyl that warms the soul!

Movies: 8MM, A Civil Action, A Love Song for Bobby Long, A Scanner Darkly, Adaptation, Bad Boys, Bad Boys II, Batman Returns, Beetlejuice, Big, Big Fish, Blood Diamond, Blow, Brazil, Broken Flowers, Casino, Cast Away, Catch Me If You Can, Constantine, Corpse Bride, Dogma, Donnie Darko, Edward Scissorhands, Face/Off, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, Forrest Gump, Four Brothers Four Rooms, From Hell, Gangs of New York, Goodfellas, Good Will Hunting, Hitch, House of 1000 Corpses, I Am Legend, I Heart Huckabees, I Robot, Imaginary Heroes, Independence Day, Iron Man, Jackie Brown, James and the Giant Peach, Jarhead, John Q, Lord of War, Man on Fire, Man of the Year, Mars Attacks!, Matchstick Men, National Treasure, Once Upon a Time in Mexico, Phenomenon, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl, Pulp Fiction, Quarantine, Raising Arizona, Reservoir Dogs, Road To Perdition, Romeo + Juliet, Saving Private Ryan, Slaughterhouse-Five, Sleepy Hollow, Spun, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street, The Aviator, The Big Lebowski, The Bourne Identity, The Bourne Supremacy, The Bourne Ultimatum, The Contender, The Dark Knight, The Departed, The Devil's Advocate, The Family Man, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, The Last Temptation of Christ, The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, The Manchurian Candidate, The Merchant of Venice, The Nightmare Before Christmas, The Ninth Gate, The Rock, The Royal Tenenbaums, The Squid and the Whale, The Terminal, The Tune, The Weather Man, Thumbsucker, Training Day, Wag The Dog, What's Eating Gilbert Grape, Zeitgeist

Books: 1984, Animal Farm, The Coroner's Lunch, The Tao Of Pooh, H.P. Lovecraft, Hacking Matter, The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing, How To Practice, Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas, God's Debris, The Religion Wars, The Cororner's Lunch

Television: Anything on any of the Discovery Channels or The History Channel, Aaahh!!! Real Monsters, Chowder, Cowboy Bebop, Death Note, Doug (before Disney ruined it), Duckman, Fringe, Home Movies, Invader Zim, Ren & Stimpy, Rocko's Modern Life, Seinfeld, Sifl & Olly, Squidbillies, Super Jail, The Colbert Report, The Critic, The Daily Show, The Marvelous Misadventures Of Flapjack, Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!, Trigun, Wonder Showzen, Xavier: Renegade Angel

My least favorite thing: The Great Gatsby - This so called "book" is the bane of my existence. I loathe it with ever fiber of my being. Could I go back in time and preventing Fitzgerald from ever writing this supposed literary classic I would have, while laughing maniacally the ENTIRE time. So help me God if time travel ever becomes a reality in my life time I will stop at nothing until that "book" is destroyed from the pages of history. I am being totally serious here people. I am getting sick and tired of everyone IMing me asking me if I am joking and then getting upset or laughing when I say yes. I genuinely do hate this "book"; as terrible as this is probably going to sound if you enjoy this "book" it could be a deal breaker and I'm probably not going to want to talk to you.

Editors

• MysTifyLemon

1) My Mom
2) Music
3) Late Night Country Drives
4) Friends
5) Coffee
6) Books

Why am I here? What is my purpose? Is this as good as it gets? Will I die alone? What is happiness? Why do people act the way they do? Why do I act the way I do? What is love really? Does love really exist or is it a mechanism humans developed to ensure the continuation of our species?

Buy it
Use it
Break it
Fix it
Trash it
Change it
Mail - upgrade it
Charge it
Point it
Zoom it
Press it
Snap it
Work it
Quick - erase it
Write it
Cut it
Paste it
Save it
Load it
Check it
Quick - rewrite it
Plug it
Play it
Burn it
Rip it
Drag and drop it
Zip - unzip it
Lock it
Fill it
Call it
Find it
View it
Code it
Jam - unlock it
Surf it
Scroll it
Pause it
Click it
Cross it
Crack it
Switch - update it
Name it
Rate it
Tune it
Print it
Scan it
Send it
Fax - rename it
Touch it
Bring it
Pay it
Watch it
Turn it
Leave it
Start - format it

Working
Drinking coffee at the local coffee house
Hanging out with friends
Playing video games
Thinking alone in my green leather chair

But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here

I don't care if it hurts,
I wanna have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul

I want you to notice
when I'm not around
You're so fuckin' special
I wish I was special

Slip Away by David Bowie makes me feel oddly introspective and unfulfilled. σ_σ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVnUxMjyR1Y

I have a thing for older women. Even if it is only a year older.

I stubbed my toe last Tuesday.

I have herpes simplex 1, you know the one associated with cold sores.

I've laughed so hard I puked.

I'm schizoaffective. If you have any questions I am willing to talk about it.

* You're never gonna give me up
* Never gonna let me down
* Never gonna run around and desert me
* Never gonna make me cry
* Never gonna say goodbye
* Never gonna tell a lie and hurt me

Note: Based on how likely we_suffer is to respond to IMs and messages from strangers we advise you to say something more interesting than "hi" or "how r u." Also please note that using u, r, 4 etc. etc. instead of actual words is very likely to cause him not to respond.

You should be absolutely hideous looking. Because I don't need to be physically attracted to you at all in order for us to have a healthy relationship. You're personality will over shadow your monstrous Mt. Everest to scale replica nose. I mean fuck, I know I am not sexy and I am a Tubby Lardo but sweet tea Jesus.

You are a human seeking another humans comfort. You aren't afraid to let your guard down. If you're humble. If you're not afraid of a challenge. The eleventh word is "sir." If you don't have your act together. If you understand what it means to be human and that forgiveness is divine. It'd be super cool if you were asexual.

You shouldn't message me if you are guarded, believe in gender roles, are looking for a savior, and are not compassionate/empathetic.

What is black and at the top of the stairs?

Christopher Reeves in a house fire. ;)

Take my test bitches and find out yourself if you should message me http://www.okcupid.com/tests/friends-or-more-test

If you saw certain parts of this profile were pure sarcasm you get bonus points.

my aim screen name is caustic jingle
if you want to text just ask i give my cell number to everyone