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30 M Saint Paul, MN

My Details

Last Online
Today – 5:42pm
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Mensch. Badass. Mr. Rogers is my spirit animal.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm an RN. I save lives and make lame jokes all day.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Making sure people don't die. I also am a massage and shiatsu therapist so I am pretty good at rubbing people and/or jabbing them with my thumbs.

I also study the martial arts. I'm a legit badass. If you're reading this I could punch you in the eyes through the screen with my word-punches so hard it would make your eyelashes wave gently, which isn't much, but it's pretty good for just sitting here typing words at you really hard with my shirt off while screaming like a lunatic.

I'm also half-way decent at the following: Playing guitar, cooking, drawing/painting, and generally brain-centric tasks.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Holy crap, that dude with the smouldering good looks sure can eat a lot of food in one sitting! He's pretty big to be spending so much time looking at action figures at target.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Jiddu Krishnamurti. Seriously, read Jiddu Krishnamurti.

I really like a huge variety of movies, everything from Robocop to Total Recall. I also like dramatic coming of age movies like Predator and The Terminator.

HBO and AMC. I love music. It is one of the best parts of being alive, but I am painfully allergic to pretense and stupidity. I listen to a vast variety of stuff, but I also really hate music for dumb people and boring people. I like a lot of weird shit. There are only two things that have ever made me cry independent of some horrible real-life stuff happening. They are the scene in Shawshank Redemption where Brooks gets out of prison, and my bi-weekly random unpredictable musical inspired soulgasm.

Also, if you ask me what I want for dinner the answer will invariably be tacos. I fucking love tacos.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I'm pretty self sufficient, there probably aren't 3 things let alone 6. Nevertheless, my quality of life is greatly benefited by coffee, sriracha, the interwebz, alternative comedy, doggies that I don't have to clean up after, and You! you beautiful saucy minx you. thanks for visiting my profile, keep being awesome.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Philosophy, Art, Absurdity, Time, Self-actualization, Jalepenos, Context, Consciousness, Guns, Nina Simone, Turtles both ninja and pedestrian, Couches, Paper Airplanes, Bike trails, History, The Internet, Aubrey Plaza, Chokeholds, Disguises, Guerrilla tactics, Little fat babies, Dogs I should adopt, Foods I should cook, Hobbies I should undertake, and of course where I might find someone just as oddly eclectic and fucking delightful as my self.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I am actually 6 racoons in a trenchcoat.

...also at any given moment I'm about 85% convinced that OKcupid is dumb and I shouldn't be doing this.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–33
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You think we have that rare inestimable "mutual weirdness" that Dr. Seuss was talking about.

Did you know that in Japan the show "Jersey Shore" is broadcast under the name "Macaroni Rascals." That is a reward to you for scrolling down this far. Great job.