Well I just moved to Tampa from Fort Lauderdale. But was born and raised in Massachusetts and have lived in Vermont, New York, Virginia and Rhode Island. I would like to find someone that has substance, class, and is a little bit of a goofball. I get paid for doing something I enjoy. I work as a wildlife biologist and enjoy not being stuck in the corporate world. I mean I get to keep my sanity and have a super awesome farmers tan. So if you like what you read hopefully I will hear from you. But regardless I will leave you one of my favorite quotes.
"Do not burn yourselves out. Be as I am-- a reluctant enthusiast...a part time crusader, a half-hearted fanatic. Save the other half of yourselves and your lives for pleasure and adventure. It is not enough to fight for the land; it is even more important to enjoy it. While you can. While it is still there. So go out there and hunt and fish and mess around with your friends, ramble out yonder and explore the forests, encounter the grizz, climb the mountains, and bag the peaks.... and I promise you this much: I promise you this one sweet victory over your enemies, over those deskbound people with their hearts in a safe deposit box... I promise you this: you will outlive the bastards"
Why is marijuana not legal? Why is marijuana not legal? Its a natural plant that grows in the dirt. You know whats not natural? 80 year old dudes with hard ons, that's not natural but we got pills for that. Were dedicating all our medical resources into keeping the old guys erect but were putting people in jail for smoking something that grows in the dirt. You know we have more prescription drugs now. Every commercial on TV is a prescription drug ad. I cant watch TV for 4 minutes without thinking I have 5 serious diseases. Like, do you ever wake up tired in the mornings, oh my god I have this, write this down whatever it is I have this. Half the time you don't even know what the commercial is, there are people running through fields or flying kites or swimming in the ocean. That is the greatest disease ever, how did you get that? that disease comes with a hot chick and a puppy.
The schools now, its all about self esteem in schools. Build the kids self esteem, make them feel good about themselves. If everybody grows up with high self-esteem who's gonna dance in our strip clubs? Whats gonna happen to our porno industry? These women don't just grow on trees. It takes lots of drunk daddies missing a lot of dance recitals before you decide to go blow a goat on the internet for 50 bucks. And if that disappears where does that leave me on a Friday with my new high speed connection?
Mastermind is another word that comes up all the time.
You keep hearing about these terrorist masterminds that are being killed over in the middle east. Terrorist masterminds. Masterminds sort of a lofty way to describe what these people do dont you think? They're not masterminds. Okay you take bomb right and you put in back pack and you get on bus and you blow yourself up Why do I have to blow myself up, why don't I put.. Who's the fucking mastermind here me or you?
Americans lets face it we've been a spoiled country for a long time. Do you know what the number one health risk in America is? Obesity - Obesity. They say we are in the middle of an obesity epidemic an epidemic like its polio. Like, well be telling our grand kids about in one day THE GREAT OBESITY EPIDEMIC OF 2004. How did you get through it granpa? Oh it was horrible Johnny but there was cheesecake and pork chops everywhere. Nobody knows why we are getting fatter look at our lifestyles. Ill sit at a drive through - I'll sit there behind 15 other cars instead of getting up and making the 8 foot walk over to the totally empty counter. Everything is mega meal, supersize, you want biggy fries with that, you want a jumbo fry, you wanna go large, you wanna biggie fry, you want thirty burgers for a nickel you fat mother fucker there's room in the bag take it! You want a 55 gallon drum coke with that? Its only 3 more cents.
Sometimes you got to suffer a little in your youth to motivate you to succeed later in life. Do you think if Bill Gates got laid in high school? Do you think there'd be a Microsoft? Of course not you gotta spend a lot of time stuffin your own locker with your underwear wedged up your ass before you think I'm gonna take over the world with computers. You'll see Ill show them.
Were in one of the richest countries in the world, and the minimum wage is lower now than it was 35 years ago. There are homeless people everywhere. This homeless guy asked me for some money the other day and I was gonna give it to him but then I thought you're just gonna use it on drugs or alcohol. And then I thought that's what I'm gonna use it on, why am I judging this poor bastard. People love to judge homeless guys. Like, your giving him money, hes just gonna waste it, hes just gonna waste the money. Well he lives in a box what do you want him to do with it save up and buy a wall unit take a little run to the store for a throw rug and a cd rack he's homeless.
I walked behind this guy the other day, a homeless guy asked him for money, he looked right at the homeless guy and goes - why don't you go and get a job you bum? People always say that to homeless guys get a job like its that easy. This guy was wearing his underwear outside his pants I'm guessing his resume ain't all up to date. I'm predicting some problems during the interview process I'm pretty sure even macdonald's has an underwear go inside the pants policy. Not that they enforce it very strictly but technically I'm sure its on the books.
Please do not contact me if you fall into the following categories.
You are still in love with your 'ex' or still have a BF.
One of your parents is having an affair or has just been caught.
You are super religious and cannot fathom the thought of someone who doesn't believe in the same thing you do.
You have an BF that will follow you on your date.
You are in the military (I have respect for what you do, but I don't like long periods of you being away. I have worked on military bases before.)
You can't date a man who hunts or fishes.
Your not sure if you want to date.
You answer, text, and look at your phone on the date.
If you are materialistic and only interested in how much money I can spend on you.