My first attempt came out too serious. The entire purpose of my life sounded like Contemplation of Mankind. My second attempt went too far in the other direction. I sounded like a K-Mart shopper, gazing at a wall of flatscreens all tuned into The Price Is Right.
It's not that I dislike Drew Carey. Or that I wouldn't love to snuggle up with someone special, both of us getting progressively distracted and forgetting that the Price Is Right was still on.
I thought about leading with my enjoyment of vacuuming. Not just because cleanliness is next to you-know-what, but because you can make the nap of the carpet stand up with that unwalked on look.
There was also the story about my friend's near death in high school and his matter-of-fact statement to me that he had learned the secret to life, which was saying yes to everything. But instead of all that, I have decided to go with the following:
I experience my life from the inside as something spectacular and extraordinary, even though from the outside it looks outrageously ordinary. I am a dad like many other dads. But I can't believe that I get to be my son's dad. I work like most people to pay my bills. But I cannot believe that I get to do most of it from home by researching and writing about things that matter to me. I also teach, just like many people. But I cannot believe some of the amazing discussions that take place with my students.
I think of myself as the falling-in-love, romantic type. Partly because I tend to experience deeply, partly because certain qualities in people are ridiculously attractive to me, and partly who knows. I am much more of the road-tripping-around-the-Northwest type than the off-to-the-airport type, and I would rather have casual Thai or Indian or burgers than dine somewhere formal. Still, lists of activities like this don't make a lot of sense to me when I am thinking about a special someone. When two people share that kind of connection, activities stop feeling like mere activities.
I am bad at telling good jokes. But I am good at telling bad jokes (what happens to frogs when they park in a no parking zone; what one cannibal said to the other cannibal when they started eating the clown; what you call cheese that isn't yours). And because they are politically incorrect, I also enjoy demented jokes (why the baby crossed the road). So please do not hesitate to reply if you are demented.
I feel like I should end with something constructive. Did you know that every car has a little arrow next to the gas gauge showing which side the gas cap is on? Thank you for reading :)