My mission, should I choose to accept it, is to make you love me in 1000 words (or slightly more).

I laugh with very little provocation, because you should never take anything too seriously (or sometimes just because I'm nervous. Or happy. Or excited. Or being tickled). I cry in equal measure; I guess passions run high in this body of mine. I cry at movies, commercials, and pictures of puppies.

I wish I could say I'm funny, but I'm usually not. It's a timing thing.

I'm loyal, I'm honest, I'm happy. I don't need much. Sometimes, I seem a little backwards, a little difficult, but I chalk it up to Feminine Mystique. All I really hope for is an adventure or two. Someone with big hands, a strong heart, and a little creativity. well, okay. what I'm really looking for is someone to hold my hand and splash in puddles with me. There, I said it.

I'm a music fiend, a junk-food junkie, and I love my mom. Sometimes I think I'm kinda hard to peg, because I'm so tolerant and malleable that sometimes I confuse myself.

Turn ons include but are not limited to: rumbly voices, belly-rubs (no really), enthusiasm, and something which I already forgot. Turn offs are, well, I think you know the drill: ignorance, insolence, indifference, and so on.

Also, I'm a skeptic of double brackets.

I am the girl, from ip, and ema

I'm in life limbo. No, really. I graduated from undergrad ages ago, on a pre-med psychology track. Spent a few years fighting with med schools, but I lost. Now, for something completely different, I'm in grad school for behavior analysis (but that probably isn't the end of my academic career). I have a Long Distant Future planned, and until then,

we'll just play some reggae and see how low can you go?

(So if you must know, I'll be a doctor someday. With the option to become everything else.

No seriously, bartender, bookseller, jewel thief, rock climber, magician ((magic magic not illusion magic!)), you name it. I wanna be it.)

I'm Really. Good. At. Academia. That's about it.

No, wait. I take it back. I give pretty good advice, or so they say, and I give one HELL of a massage. I do a mean tarot spread, because I think tarot might be a really great psychological instrument. Also, I don't know if this will turn you on, or what, but I could kick your ass in Tetris Attack, and quote almost every line in The Matrix.

THINGS I WISH I WERE GOOD AT: Lock-picking, bow-hunting, bar-tending, rock-climbing, and speed-reading. (and, obviously, mind-reading. That one's a work in progress.)

Well, my hair changes a lot. People mention that. Also, they say I have a well-proportioned set of curves. If you've ever met my mother, you might tell me I look just like her. But mostly, I think I just give off this Wise Vibe. People are either drawn to me or intimidated by me, based on that "wow, she must be smart" factor. Or maybe that's just the kickass glasses.

(a) Orson Scott Card. Madeline L'Engle. Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff. I like sci-fi and fantasy, (sidenote- you are NOT culturally literate until you've read the standards: Tolkien, Hitchiker, Harry Potter, Narnia, Dune, and so on.), romance, and every-so-often I go through a mystery phase. I could also read a philosophy or psychology textbook end-to-end without getting bored!

(b) Mind-fuck movies. anything both romantic and profound. What Dreams May Come, The Fountain, Practical Magic, The Matrix, Powder, Harold and Maude, Amelie. ... I can't say I'm a big movie-buff, but I often think I'd like to be.

(c) When I first joined OKC they didn't include shows in this question! Whaaaat! How I Met Your Mother, New Girl, Big Bang Theory, Castle, Firefly (duh), Star Treks: TOS, TNG, and Voyager (don't judge), Battlestar Galactica. I mean, I'll try out pretty much any sitcom or syfy show.

(d) This is the big one. MUSIC. I have more music than I could listen to in a lifetime, and yet I keep collecting. Top 10, off the top of my head (I'm sure it'll change soon), are: Nick Drake, Beyonce (don't judge man that's my jam), Jump Little Children, Magnetic Fields, Dresden Dolls, The Shins, Maroon 5, The Mars Volta, The Music, Of Montreal, The Beatles, Regina Spektor, M Ward, Sigur Ros, Mindless Self Indulgence. ..wait, that was more than 10. I lied.

(e) Mmm. Food. I like food. I'm a sushi fiend, a junk food junkie, and a breakfast-aholic. I'll try anything twice (and I'll probably like it), but when it comes to food, I'm a cheap date. Gimme some Taco Bell or maybe a Frosty from Wendy's, and we'll be friends forever.

This is the worst question.

a) I could never "do" anything without an action verb or modifier, hello.

b) I couldn't LIVE without: water, air, food, sunlight, etc. I'm like a flower. (Oh, what's that? I'm not the only one, you say? What?!)

c) I couldn't live in the style to which I'm accustomed without: the masterchief(that's my computer); VV Blue(that's my car); Worthington (that's my cell phone); music; hot water; and the English language.

d) Finally, I could not live the life that is uniquely mine without:
1. the way grass feels at 3 in the morning.
2. that moment when the irritation you feel at the overstimulating, undersatisfying world around you becomes for a moment sublime and everlasting Oneness.
3. my sweet real-world tetris skills, my pervasive childhood love of maps, and my innate sense of direction. (i.e, Best. Traveler. Ever. This is the underutilized trait combo of my life.)
4. things that vibrate.
5. Visual aids. (This is probably cheating because a bunch of my favourite things are Visual Aids Which Exist to Improve Your Life. I would argue that color wheels and the periodic table and venn diagram jokes and the Karma Sutra are all of this category, and vitally important to our lives. Clearly that's a bunch of important things, not one. Cheater, cheater.)
6. the first, perfect sip of each and every cup of coffee. Also, the first taste of every IPA, margarita, and man I've ever had.

If I really want the things I say I want. (I am a girl, after all.) Here's a hint:

I want someone who agrees with me, but I need someone who will argue.
I want someone (something) practical, but I always have my head in the clouds.
I want wild passion, but I never put both feet in.
I want a super-successful career, but I need a family.
I want a man whose weapon is his mind, but I think a man who works with his hands is dead sexy.
I want a man who is ambitious, but I find people who are restless or dissatisfied highly alarming.
I want to find someone who is fierce and creative and insatiable in bed, but who doesn't think from his pants.
I want someone who feels dependable, but I loathe the moment I find him predictable.

Well, I think you see my point. The worst (best) part is this: I don't usually think this impossible laundry list is a contradiction at all. Men of the internet beware. This is an honest look into the woman's psyche. We are all this complicated.

Find me at the lake, or a concert, or hiding under my covers, or maybe staring at the moon. If I'm lucky, though, I'm with a bunch of friends. But if I'm really lucky, only the ones that I love the most.

Taboo subjects are nothing more than social barriers which stymie honesty. (Read: Privacy? What privacy?!)

Wait. I take it back. The most private thing I'm willing to admit here is a terribly vulnerable secret. Ready? I fall in love --just a little-- every.single.time I meet a new person. I hide it from myself, of course (I'm a very strict master). But the truth is, I'm attracted to people. All the time. For their smiles, for their honesty, for their magic.

I know two important physical laws: opposites attract, and like dissolves like. I haven't quite decided which law rules emotional relationships, but I have a feeling that it's a little bit of both.

So you should message me if any of these things apply: You believe in physical laws. You believe in transcendence. You know the answer to my opposite/like dilemma. You want to talk to me. You want to know me better. You want to flirt a little. You want to fall in love. You think you can teach me a sweet skill that I don't yet possess.

You should definitely message me if you can demonstrate this highly attractive skill: If I perchance ask "How was your day?", you can reliably answer with something cleverer than, "fine."

You should message me immediately after you read Nicole Daedone so you can tell me your thoughts:
How to fuck a turned on woman
A letter of apology to men

Having spent nearly four years on this website, here are the reasons you should probably NOT message me: if you're well over 40 cause frankly I just find it a little weird. if you have nothing better to say than "hey gurl ur hawt hit me bak at ### ### ####." If you're looking for candidates for threesomes. If you have no picture, profile information, and no profile matches. And listen, I know that my profile is long, but you don't get brownie points for reading the whole thing so no need to mention it. Especially if you misquote it or didn't bother to understand my point.