entrepreneur, designer, roller derby wannabe, closet romantic, sexy fat lady who sometimes wears red lipstick and drinks bourbon and ginger ale...i'm a smart, sassy, secretly nerdy homebody (natural introvert and currently working from home) stepping out onto the internet to meet dudes that aren't my mailman or the old guy who smokes a cigar on the stoop next door.

in the past few years, my cynical smart-ass shell has cracked a bit. maybe it's age, maybe it was actually experiencing a functional relationship but i now know that love and romance can exist in life without it devolving into kate hudson movie cliches, and i'm ready for more of that, please.

oh and i should say this. my username. no it's not some unsubtle winking double entendre. wonderpus octopus. look it up. magical.

i was an actor for a while. then an office drone. then i started a sweet little interior design firm with my best friend. i work from home and work a lot but i love it and the business is my little bundle of joy.

making pancakes
singing along with guitar solos
putting together ikea furniture
doodling

my old lady style glasses

i love tv. so so much. i can't wait for breaking bad to come back and am dreading game of thrones leaving again. between those two i plan to do a rewatch/series completion of the wire. i love quirky comedies anything british, archer, and arrested development or course. and i feel like my sense of humor was shaped 100% by seasons 6-9 of the simpsons.

movies...
right now, i adore the godfather, annie hall, and dog day afternoon. i guess i'm into the 70's. oh my gosh, and you know how there are those movies that you will always watch when they are on tv every single time. they're not your favorite necessarily but they suck you in no matter how many times you've seen them. mine are anchorman and the fugitive.

music...
i'm obsessed with npr and history/science podcasts. that's not music but it comes out of my ipod so shut it. arcade fire is my favorite band. and i just heard wonderwall on the radio and it reminds my how awesome oasis was when i was 15.

books...
non-fiction, pop science/psychology stuff, literary fiction and

food wise? really thin crust pizza, cereal, pineapple, sultan's market falafal, the whole foods salad bar, burgers, dark chocolate...and if someone told me i'd have to choose between a life without oral sex or a life without cheese, i'd just throw myself off a bridge.

iced coffee
a really good pen
netflix
rosebud salve lip gloss
black tights
google maps

if i should get more tattoos.

i have a crush on nick offerman. partly because of ron swanson. partly because he's a woodworker and makes amazing things like canoes and tables from tree trunks. that's hot.

you want to! i want to start going out on more dates so if you think i'm cool and i'm feeling it too, let's get a drink. why not?

you're confident, gregarious and up for adventures! i'm naturally a bit shy and can fall back into awkwardness so it's nice if i can both lean on you, and be pushed out of my shell a bit.

you're, as dan savage says, GGG. sex is fun, silly, enlightening, cathartic, and totally rad. leave your hangups at home, please.

you're a geeky smarty-pants. i mean really, nothing beats an brilliant mind, sharp wit and intellectual curiosity.