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37 M Emeryville, CA

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 9:55pm
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Buddhism, and somewhat serious about it
Capricorn, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Entertainment / Media
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Might want kids
Has cats
English (Fluently), Portuguese (Okay)

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My self-summary
Everyone has the nicest, most interesting things to say about whatever they are trying to sell you. Internet profiles are no different.

Oh, & btw... I'm actually not 37. The moment I turned 40 it seemed as though OKC was matching me up with people with whom I really didn't have a great deal in common. So' I'm not trying to be dishonest or mislead anyone, but I am knowingly & deliberatly misinforming the engine so that it might perform better for me.

Plus, having to "explain yourself" to total strangers is bloody demeaning. But if we are creatures who prefer validation over decorum, then we probably deserve it.

I'm a well-contained spill.
What I’m doing with my life
Native Arkansan who's lived all-over... Tennessee, Pennsylvania, Vermont, California, Colorado, Brazil... My first degree is a bachelors of fine arts. The most recent is a bachelors of applied sciences in motion graphic design. So, I'm working as a freelance designer. It's very challenging & comes with its own set of frustrations, but the work engages me to find solutions & solve problems. Everyday I walk away with having learned something new!
I’m really good at
Disorganizing the Feng Shui section of the bookstore.
Listening to At the Drive-in at the drive-in.
Wanting to play 6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon with Kevin Bacon.
Being sarcastic and "acerbic."
Viewing people's profiles over & over without making any effort to contact them. (I know you can view who's paid you a visit. I do it to be "creepy." If you think it's creepy, too, then you and I are already off to an amazing start.)
Looking presentable.
Getting the dumbest tattoos ever.
Tying people up with rope & slapping them around.
Spoiling my friends.
Fuck drum circles. I'm into GONG SQUARES!
Pushing people's buttons.
Throwing the goat.
"Polyamorous" & "monogamous" are good words to describe a situation or arrangement between partners. It's a poor way to describe people. A person is far more than the type of relationships they favor & the tendency to designate who a person is by their relationship(s) seems very two-dimensional to me & very much lacking in imagination-- "life" is to "lifestyle" what "person" is to "persona."
"Polymath," however, is a great way to describe someone... especially if you are one!
Finding eyebrow piercings rather provincial.
Eating donuts.
Listening to Prince records.
I will melt your fucking FACE on the dance floor.
Spitting in girls' mouths.
Hanging out with my cats.
Riding my bike.
Drinking coffee.
Being totally disinterested in Burning Man. (Seriously. Why would I want to pay hundreds of dollars to attend an event where I have to bring everything I would need just to be surrounded by really bad art and the people responsible for it, along with some aged cougars wearing fake fur and fairy wings... along with a lot of people who should REALLY keep their clothes ON... whilst listening to THE MOST INSIPID MUSIC EVER... and calling it a "spiritual awakening?"
"Radical self-expression" you say? Gosh! Bloody fascinating, that is! Well done! I do a lot of that, too... I'm doing it right now, only somehow I manage to not dress myself like a complete twat with 40,000 other folks when I do it. "Making things?" Yeah, I manage to do that pretty much daily at work as well as at home. "Creating community?" I'd rather (and do) contribute to those i already inhabit. "Radical self-reliance?" I'm more likely to cultivate that by actually going out to a remote place BY MYSELF & having to make fire & shelter find a clean source of water to sustain me, not driving an RV out to where there are tens of thousands of other yahoos & a medical tent. I abort you... with my eyes. Go take a shit in your stupid top hat with the feathers & goggles, you fucking farm animal. Please remove yourself from my air-space. Please remove yourself from my planet. Seriously -- please take your basic-bitch-ass & your little theme-camp of basic-bitch-ass-shit & go back to Planet Yawn. I'm not interested in your "experience" because your experience isn't interesting. We already know what happened -- you went out to the desert for a week to party & fuck while wearing something stupid, listening to crap music & watching blinky lights in a temporary sculpture garden. For reals. You are boring.)
The first things people usually notice about me
My eyes. My glasses.

That I am an "amoral, sensual & cunning monster," as one friend had once so delicately put it.

But another friend (whom I met on here!) tells me, "You are a far sweeter person than your OKC profile conveys."

So, I suppose I have THAT going for me, which is nice.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Too many to mention. Burroughs, Baudelaire, Rimbaud, Celine, Genet, Don Bajema, Dennis Cooper, Bukowski, Hubert Selby Jr., John Fante, Harry Crews, Walt Whitman, Dante, Marquise de Sade, Marcus Aurelius, Machiavelli, Salinger, Brad Warner, Chuck Klosterman, David Sedaris, a lot of history, a lot of reference and how-to's, a lot of coffee table books that are more for looking through than actually reading...

All the best food was created by the peasant class. They are the one's who had to be inventive with food and came up with the cuisine by which we identify nations. The wealthy eat the same stuff all over the world.

I'm a recovering music major, so my taste is rather all over the place. The categorical chunks consist of punk & hardcore, a lot of jazz and improvised music, metal, old country, flamenco, soul and old doo-wop.

When you take on the aesthetic of a given thing, but forgo the ethos, then you are not creating that thing, but merely making a reference TO such a thing. This requires adding a "y" at the end of the term used to designate said thing and thus clarify your position. EXAMPLE: Something that is "art" becomes something that is "arty." Something that is a "sport" becomes "sporty." "Punk" becomes "punky." "Jazz" becomes "jazzy."

TV: Luther, saxondale, Sherlock, twin peaks, the wire, deadwood, sons of anarchy, mad men, black books, the IT crowd, breaking bad, arrested development, the real football factories, orange is the new black, house of cards, twilight zone, the prisoner, oddities San Francisco

FILM: Cyrano de Bergerac, the shining, a clockwork orange, miller's crossing, over the edge, quadrophonia, an American werewolf in London, full metal jacket, bellflower, Paris is burning, streets of fire, cruising, in the realm of the senses, let's get lost, snatch, salo, ladies & gentlemen - the fabulous stains, dog town & z-boys, Times Square, taxi driver, the forbidden zone, blue velvet, until the light takes us, Rushmore, the royal tenanbaums, lost in translation, gummo, last exit to Brooklyn, fast times at ridgemont high, dazed & confused, the breakfast club, pretty in pink, say anything, the Rachel papers, l.a. Confidential, raging bull, this is spinal tap, the godfather 1 & 2 (not 3), fist of legend, enter the dragon, old boy, irreversible, the exorcist, the football factory, the firm, valley girl, wild at heart, blue valentine, last tango in Paris, hairspray, the great escape, Kelly's heroes...

My favorite movie is Jaws. I think it should be made into a musical.
The six things I could never do without
Food. Shelter. Clothing. Sleep. Water. A purpose.

If we're talking about objects, then a knife, a lighter, a camera, a length of rope & my glasses.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
With ALL the folks on here using words & phrases like, "spontaneous," "transformative experiences," "laid-back," "openness," "creative," "living the dream," "generating thankfulness," "expressing myself" & "various incarnations" -- makes me wonder if there's an app out there that simply generates profiles... & if there is, is it being marketed as novelty?

Understanding that the problem really isn't the problem, but my attitude towards the problem...
Understanding that non-attachment isn't the same as detachment.
Wondering what circumstances will result in my own death - as a method to motivate myself.
On a typical Friday night I am
in out-patients.

(Hint* It's a reference to a song. If you got it right out the gate, then you should get in touch with me immediately to collect your prize.)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I've been a non-drinker since I was 19 & have only recently started drinking socially. I was never in a 12 step program so I haven't "fallen off the wagon" or "broken edge." Drinking was just something I never got into & it was never big part of my social life. It also means I have no tolerance to alcohol whatsoever, so I'm a very cheap date.

I also have another profile on here that is assembled from excerpts of the dumbest, most banal profiles I've read on here. The sad part is that it has gotten 10-times more traffic from the worst people ever. Keeps me entertained.

I'm also finding that my sapiosexual side is at odds with most of my options within the kink community. In other words, my libido is like a zombie & just wants BRAINS!!!!! Oh, & "safe sex" is a lot more than just protection from pathogens. It also means a safe place emotionally & psychologically. And "sex positivity" means valueing people's right to choose what works for them in a sexual context, not basing their value solely on those choices. So stop reducing people simply because they take pleasure in something that you do not.

I will not allow a woman into my home unless she is wearing heels. It's a rule. It's radar-enforced. Which means I enforce it... and when I do so, it is with RADAR. 

Also, I've made "surprise appearances" in 6 books, so far. It all started out innocently enough... the first chronicled the work of a musician under whom I had studied in college. Another was a fetish photography book. Then there was that book about "one man's journey through the world of fighting" and things got incredibly strange from there.

I've also been on TV as a cast member of a science-based reality show, so total strangers will know me by name & it's something I doubt I'll ever get used to.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 26–40
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends
You should message me if
you are "interested."

You should definitely NOT message me if you claim to be "creative" and yet are somehow utterly incapable of using the word, "Vegas" in a sentence without immediately interjecting it with, "baby!"... because that just makes me feel lied to.

Please refrain from trying to get me to attend orgasmic meditation "workshops" that are cloaked in pseudo-spirituality & designed to "liberate" me [of my hard-earned money.] I don't care that Nicole Daedone did a TEDx talk. You folks are a total cult. I already have a healthy zazen practice going & I'm a total perv, so my life is already filled with plenty of meditation & orgasms & I needn't pay a dime to achieve either. So, go kick rocks.

Just really looking to hang out with good people & nothing more. A friend had said to me in conversation recently, "You may not want anything serious right now, but you always want to be around someone you can take seriously." I think that's probably an apt assessment. I like people who are genuine, honest, driven, daring, passionate, stubborn, challenging & yes, even flawed... people who are more curious than they are afraid. Fucking up is just feedback & feedback is the true breakfast of champions.

I'm a bit wary of folks who are inconsistent. If you're going to huff & puff about yourself as this or that, it should show in your behavior.

And please have the brass to be yourself, because these days being "different" really isn't very different.

I'm somewhat defenseless against:

glasses, accents, large noses, denim, knee socks, nerdy pervs and purdy nerves.