I love movies (I'm not as good as I used to be at recalling facts, but I still know more than the average person, so people still call me "the Human IMDb") and I'm open to seeing anything at least once (even the films of Michael Bay! *shudder*) but I've been told I'm a bit of a Film Buff Snob at times. I love reading, writing (mostly bad poetry, and stories that have no endings or believable shenanigans). I'm a Jackass with occasional wit and much sarcasm. I like going to comic book conventions and getting different artists to do sketches in one of my sketchbooks. I'm a gigantic, ginormous, hugantic nerd and bookworm. Always have been and always will be. I'm fiercely loyal to my family and friends.
I'm a self-described Apathetic Agnostic and "follow" the Pastafarian way of life. I openly mock organized religion both because I think religion is silly and hilarious and because if I didn't laugh at it, I'd probably cry. That being said, I DO believe and know that every religion has it's good points, and that there are some very beautiful things about religions. It's the dogma I usually have problems with... oh and a lot of the people, too, like the zealots n such. I'm a horrible, horrible liar. If I lie, it's almost always followed by me saying "That's total bullshit." All the other times, it's obvious I'm lying, so I've come to the conclusion that I really shouldn't bother lying. It's pointless, in the end. Best to just let my freak flag fly, as they say. I'm a rather voracious carnivore with moments of omnivore-ishness. I love sandwiches and Legos and poking dead things with a stick.
I love to laugh and love to make people laugh even more. I can't dance to save my life, and I don't care to learn. Dancing holds no excitement for me. I have ADD and an anxiety disorder, and both make a potent mix for some interesting times.
I'm always wrong, even when I'm right. I'm 20 pounds or so overweight. I'm not very active, but I'm not really lazy either. I just think about Batman an awful lot. I'm not into sports much. I like watching hockey and the occasional baseball game, but beyond that I'll only regularly watch sports when either of the Olympics are on. I should probably take the time to mention that I'm divorced, and I'm living with my parents at the moment because debt is a bitch, and I accumulated far too much for my salary. I don't plan on suckling the parental teat forever, though. I'm almost out of the hole I dug myself into. Almost. I know that's something that's not a great selling point, but it is what it is. Besides, I'm a decent guy (and I'm honestly not the only person who thinks so).
I'm a self-diagnosed chronic depressive and OCD. I am a hopeful pessimist. I'm sweaty. I like to blame the meds I take on a daily basis (none are anti-psychotics!) for causing my sweatiness. I like to sell myself short, like Bridget at the Bunny Ranch. If you got the lyric reference, you deserve a cookie. I like the colors red, black, and purple (because all cool people like me n Mr. Samuel L. Jackson, love purple!) I'm a homebody, so parties scare me, as do large crowds in general. I hate rollercoasters, but promise me something in return and I'll see what I can do. I have the body of a man, and the emotions of a woman... a very hysterical woman (meaning, my parents raised me to be a bit of a wussy). I am an introvert, but I have my moments of extroverticity (my own word!), I just have to feel comfortable with ya. I curse like a sailor (not that I know any sailors, living where I live and all.... I just imagine I curse like they would.) I'm a god-damn liberal living in Republican Central (or so it seems). I get distracted easily. Especially by squirrels and women-folk and shiny objects. I've probably repeated myself a few times within this section, but that's gonna happen when you're me. I do apologize for any and all repetitions. I'm not perfect. Hell, my family often claims that I am not even of this world. I say, "you mean like Jesus?" and they say, "no, like alien from another planet "and I say, "oh.... okay."
Holy son of a mother, this thing was much much much longer than I meant for it to be. Have I revealed too much? Have I pulled the curtain of the Great and Mighty Oz too wide? Maybe. Maybe not. In either case, this is all the absolute truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me Crimson King (aka Stephen King aka my own imaginary God.)
I am (mostly) decent, hilarious, and odd as I wanna be