Ashlee Simpson

Damn. Hope your parents kept the receipt, because the merchandise is defective. Your mom must be pissed. Nine months of physical duress, and the end result is you. If you were an animal, the pack would have killed and eaten you already. Shit, if I knew you, I would have killed you, just to get you out of the gene pool. Your score's symbol is Ashlee Simpson, number one on the Top Ten List of People Who Even God Hates.

All possible test results

Ashlee Simpson

Damn. Hope your parents kept the receipt, because the merchandise is defective. Your mom must be pissed. Nine months of physical duress, and the end result is you. If you were an animal, the pack ... Read more

Paris Hilton

Lacking any logic, your somewhat elevated score is probably attributable to the blind and stupid persistence which personifies your life. This persistence is a characteristic of the slightly-more-rea... Read more

Ben Affleck

You are the poster child for mediocrity. However, like your namesake, your position in life (being above a majority of the population) enables you to convince others that you're actually more intelli... Read more

Probably sentient

Your score transcends any association with a celebrity, because celebrities are vacuous dickheads, as a rule. The best things I can say for you are that 1) you are probably equipped with the basic t... Read more

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