The Freudian Character Test

Freud thought that the ideal character was the genital character. These people are sexually mature. They are capable of loving others and being loved in return. They don't waste their libidinal energies on immature fixations. The genital character doesn't exist on this test. We wanted to see how dysfunctional you are, remember?

So what does my highest score mean?

The Oral Receptive Character

This character occurs when an infant is overindulged. As a child, they were likely unconditionally encouraged and praised. In adulthood, they tend to be dependent, gullible, and overly optimistic. Their friends find them very demanding, which is confusing and hurtful to the Oral Receptive Character. This character needs to learn to accept that not everyone will love them.

The Oral Aggressive Character

This character occurs when an infant was often frustrated. Later in life, they learn to exploit other people. They frequently argue and like to debate...as long as it's understood that they are always right. They also tend to be a little sarcastic. And yes, they like to chew on things. (Oral-fixation anyone? Yeah, now it makes sense.)

The Anal Retentive Character

This character stems from problems in toilet training. Yes, indeed, the Anal Retentive Character had something against the potty. These people tend to be very regimented and orderly. Everything must be perfect so that they feel in control.

The Phallic Character

Ah, what would a Freudian test be without a phallus? The Phallic Character results when the Oedipus conflict is not entirely resolved. For men, they felt threatened by their father and consequently feel castration anxiety. For females, apparently they just really want a penis. Either way, Phallic Characters tend to be exhibitionists, often trying to seduce others to make up for feeling threatened as a child.

How many Freudians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two: One to screw in the lightbulb, and one to hold the penis.
Um, I mean, ladder.