You are the CUCKOO'S NESTMATE. The bird next to you pretending to be your brother is getting all the food, and you're about to be squashed.
SEEK: to get the hell away from those charming friends of yours who seem to have everything going for them. It's not their fault, they're not evil-- it's just that they're EATING ALL YOUR WORMS. Try hanging out with some losers for a change. (Trust me-- there's always someone lower than you are.) Just DON'T DATE THEM-- it's your turn to be the cuckoo. (Although just FYI: cool it with the loon thing, 'K?)
AVOID: setup dates. Cuckoos have a vested interest in non-cuckoos breeding-- but they have no idea what species their friends are. For instance, if you're a crow, odds are you'll end up sitting across the table from a very embarassed chicken.
Links to all the VPI categories: Curious Bloodstain, Cuckoo's Nestmate, Meaningless Advice, Second From the Left, Quiet Horror, Naked Mole Rat, Iceberg Hidden in the Fog, Incomplete Tarot Deck, Dead Houseplant, Mistuned TV, Burned Out, Zombie Flamingo, Nurse Shark, Paper Cup, Lamprey, Pyroclastic Flow, Cassandra, Sphinx, Futility, Coleocanth, The Star! (MV), Swamp Island, PANIC!!1!, Lone Freeway Shoe, Bad Tattoo, Unnecessary Heimlich Maneuver, Illegible Warning.
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