A great man once said, "people are like cocktails. They make you feel good, they taste nice, and if you go the right spot, you can buy one for about $10." Actually, it was my uncle that said that and he spent a good length of time in jail after trying to put that idea into practice.
Truth is, we all know that people are complex organisms, made up of a whole mix of organs, stretchy bits, liquids, and other such things. But what if we were all liquid? If there were a drink that personified your good self, what would it be? You're about to discover the answer to that exact question. Across three variables and 27 categories - some alcoholic, some not - we'll sort out whether you'd be something fizzy and refreshing, or whether you're the sort to make people black out after they have too much of you.
So, have another double shot of vodka (unless you're under 18 - underage drinking is wrong, kids), and click ahead.
LAUNCHED: August 31, 2007.
UPDATED: October 24, 2008.