• Do you know your languages? Can you rub shoulders with the assorted non-Americans of this world? Or are you one of those people who goes around yelling "Do you speak English?" at shopkeepers and unlucky passers-by wherever you go? This test tries to determine your ability to wing it or win it, or your ability to appear an uninformed tourist.

    And yes, if you're European, you probably have a fair advantage in this test. Ahh, Europe - the biggest melting pot of the world, and nobody usually has a clue what they're saying to eachother. You Americans have it easy in your monoglot nation.

    The test measures four things: your comprehension of Germanic languages (German, Dutch, Danish, etc.), Romance languages (Spanish, Italian, French, etc.), Slavic (or Slavonic) languages (Russian, Czech, Serbian etc.) and Other languages.

    Here's a slight disclaimer: this test is a little silly in places, and very silly in other places. Expect to not only break your head once or twice, but expect to chuckle a little as well. Also, an appreciation of Eddie Izzard's stand up is handy, but not required.

    This bad bit of test writing is dedicated to the greater glory and memory of the great and prolific author, the late Robert Jordan, God rest his soul.