• Hi! And welcome to my How Blonde Are You? Offensive Test. I will measure your Dumblondeness, Girlieness, Sluttiness, and Shallowness, which (when combined) will determine your Overall Blondeness Score. This test will probably be somewhat offensive to non-blondes and especially offensive to blondes (or the ones who are smart enough to be offended), but I don't care, get a sense of humor! Also, please keep in mind that this test is meant for girls.