• Are you the thymine to my adenine? Florentino Ariza to my Fermina Daza? Sperm whale to my Architeuthis dux? In this test, I will use the finest algorithms ever generated by lead-weighted beetles crawling on typewriters that are missing various keys in order to determine if you could put up with me, or if you're consigned to the ever-growing collection of, er, ANTHROPOLOGIC SPECIMENS in my basement. *This test has been approved by the expert testweasel Lord Percival McStufferson III, Esq.