The "Which Member Of The Band Are You?" Test

Drunk

Late

Drunk AND Late

On time

Backstage, warming up, going over the songs in your head.

Backstage, making out/having sex with your significant other

Out front, making yourself known, getting as many numbers as you can, passing out the name of your hotel and room number.

Out getting hammered, snorting, smoking or injecting your drug/drugs of choice.

The first one on stage.

The second one on stage.

Second to last one on stage and you try and upstage anyone coming after you.

Waiting for the audience to become loud enough so you can enter the stage with fireworks, jet flybys and 10 minutes of thunderous applause before you even start the first song.

Something loose and comfortable so you don't get too hot under the lights.

sunglasses 

10 inch platforms, spiked shoulderpads, Devil horns and full body paint

Pants so tight nothing is left to the imagination, and a  fishnet sleeveless top.

Light yourself on fire just for the awesome factor!

Concentrate on not messing up, being creative and performing skillfully.

Jump into the crowd and let the adoring fans grope you!

Let the music overtake you, zone out and just groove man...

Spontaneously combust

Pass out from all the alcohol/drugs.

Go backstage to have sex with groupies while everyone else plays or sings a solo.

Still be on stage... playing.

Fans getting naked for you in the audience.

The floor

Your significant other who is in the front row/just off stage

Nobody! You're just focusing on how you can best put on a show for all the people staring at YOU!

Me! And you all better not forget it!

The drummer.

All the members are equally important.

Well, I am and everyone knows it, even if they don't say anything.

I don't want a solo.

Yeah right, the whole concert is my Solo!

Five minutes

Twenty minutes and it is EPIC!

With your significant other celebrating backstage with close friends.

Sleeping.

In the tour bus bangin' down groupies like its going out of style.

At the after party, where booze flows like water, everyone is naked and the debauchery never stops!

All of em! Quantity over quality I say!

Only the finest of the fine. I can't soil my reputation by settling for anything less.

I'm taken man.

Those who are knowledgable and passionate about the music we play and life in general.

Whenever. I'm not gonna show up anyways because I don't need to practice.

Five days a week.

Once a week is fine. Each member should practice more on their own.

I don't care as long as there is booze/drugs there.

To Hell with this city! There's no way I'm performing for these ungrateful bastards! Can't they read?

No Big deal man.

It's cool, we'll play the show but this hotel room is getting trashed!!

Who's Idea was it to put that in the contract?