(formerly the Celebrity Misbehaviour Test)
Did you cringe when watching Tom Cruise jump up and down like a six-year-old on ecstasy during an interview with Oprah about his relationship with Katie Holmes? Perhaps you find those teary Oscar-acceptance speeches excruciating (Ms. Theron, Ms. Paltrow, Ms. Berry, I'm looking in your direction). Perhaps you even get sick of hearing about the drug-addled behaviour of assorted musicians. And Courtney Love.
The point is, while it's easy for us to look and judge from the outside, being in the limelight that much can do funny things to a person's behaviour. Suddenly, you find yourself insisting on hotels where the sheets have a minimum thread count of 250. You stop buying your mother flowers for her birthday and start buying her harems comprised mainly of illegal immigrants. When you find photographers in the bushes outside your house, you sue them instead of punching them out like most people would. In fact, many celebrities don't change at all, but need only walk down to the corner store to find themselves on magazine covers. We're at a point now where we'll soon get tabloids with headings like "Nicole Richie eats a hotdog. Twice."
So if you were thrust into the spotlight, how would you respond? Would you be career-driven or would you only release a new movie in between each trip to rehab? Would you whore yourself out for constant publicity, or would you just become a recluse and develop a drinking problem like normal people?
Take this test, and my people will call your people with the results.
LAUNCHED: July 25, 2006.
UPDATED: October 22, 2008.